Me...photoshop is cooool!!!
My Beliefs
Throughout most of my life, I was very confused about spirituality. When I was very young, about 10 through about 13, I experimented with religion. I went to church with friends, and with my grandparents. I've been to Mormon, Catholic and Baptist church. Somehow, christianity never felt right in my soul. So, I kind of gave up on religion. I went through high school kind of lost. I didn't know what I wanted to do with myself. I didn't know what to believe. I wrote lots of dark poetry and was obsessed with death.
I experienced a "manic episode" (that's what the doctors call it), but to me I felt I was suddenly enlightened. After I got out of the hospital in '97, I began to seek spirituality again, but not in the same places as I had before. I began to study the occult. Wicca at first, but too many aspects of wicca didn't feel right to me. I went to my first pagan gathering last September ('98) and met some of the most wonderful people I've ever met. (note: I've been off medication and haven't seen a doctor in over a year, and have been quite well balanced since...better than ever)
In the last year, I've been studying paganism under a mostly Celtic (but very ecclectic) teacher who I shared a tent with at my first gathering. I've learned a lot from her, from channeling energy to history and mythology, and have gained a great friend and guide.
I always felt there was something more than just eating, working, sleeping and breathing. I no longer believe much in coincidence. I've had dreams that came true in every detail. I've had past life visions. I can feel when someone close to me is in pain, or has had something wonderful happen to them. I've always trusted this intuition, and most of the time (but not always), it's turned out to be right. I'm not sure what path lays ahead of me, who is? I don't pretend to "know" if there is or isn't a god or many gods and goddesses. I only "know" what I experience. I've no experience with deity. Faith is something that has never come easily for me. It is the connected events that convince me of the existence of "something else" out there. I take into account every little detail that goes on around me. If you walk with blinders on, you only see a small part of what's ahead and nothing of what's happening around you. I hope this makes sense to whoever's reading it. It's only a small part of my thinking. I'm so busy, it took me at least a month just to get this far. Send me an email if you want to delve deeper.