Katti cried herself to sleep again that night. There face to face with her own daughter
and not a word came out of her mouth. She flew away from the scene, with her heart
throbbing for her daughter. When the car came down the road she was almost
positive that the girls were going to be hit. Her mind snapped {not again she thought,
you can't let it happen to me again} Katti flew out toward her daughter and grabbed
the girls up into her arms running for safety. Realizing she had heather in her arms, Katti
didn't want to put her down. Her eyes filled with tears for the child that she had never
known, the little girl she never picked up and held before. Yet she was here in her arms
now, how hard would it be to just say my precious daughter I love you sooo very much.
No word's came and she continued to hang onto Heather. Then the frighten look in
Heathers eyes as she demanded to be put down brought Katti back to her sences.
She had to get away, to run before she burst out right there.

All the way home Katti kept her mind focused on Heather. What would she have done
if something happened to the little girl. Ohhh god! her mind was going wild. Once home
she tried to take a warm bath and get the incident out of her mind but she couldn't. There
was no way. Sleep came upon here hard, she tossed and turned as the nightmares of
5 years ago came back into her head. A sound suddenly awakened Katti, she jerked up
sitting straight up in the bed, sweat was running down her face. Looking around to get her
barings Katti slowly climed out of the bed walking toward the bathroom. Bent over the sink
she threw water in her face. {Get a grip} she told herself. The gazed into the mirror show
the stress of the night on her pretty face.  {Help me Joel, help me get our little girl to love me.}

The night a lonely and Katti coldn't sleep, she thought she would turn on the computer and
do a little bit of that web page she working on. An hour later she was still sitting there no
futher ahead than when she started. Her mind just wasn't into it. Yet sleep would not come
she knew the early morning sun would come up before she would lie back down. To keep
her mind occupied she started surfing the net. Link into link. Finding herself into articles about
the middle east. She read a bit on Islamic women, and then a bit on christanity in the middle
east. Then she found a link to a site that told of young women dying. Dying in the name of
honor. Reading the stories she was overwhelmed by the ideal of being stoned to death or
murdered over virture in the 90's. Barbaric customs. She found a site on Aladdin. The
cartoon charater. Flipping through that site Katti smiled {quite a contrass from stoning your
daughters to death} she thought to herself. She found a site called Welcome to Jordan (dalnet)
It was colorful, and she smiled at the amature construction of the site, yet she flipped through
it page after page.  Someone she thought loved the ideal of being an arab, the pages produced
a picture of romantic nights and loving familys. The intrigue caused her to continue. She clicked
on LIVE CHAT, never being in a chat room she thought it would be interesting just to watch.
Upon entering the chat room no one was there. {Hahaha,} she thought {serves you right}
An empty chat room just like her empty life. {Damn!} just as she was about to click the room
closed a name appeared. AnAngel, came in.

"Hi there" came the greeting
"Hi back" Katti typed
<AnAngel> What's Up?
<Katti> Not much how about yourself?
<AnAngel> Just making my daily ck of the site and making sure it is in working order.
<Katti> Yeah, I was just in checking it out. Cute site. Your arabic I take it?
<AnAngel> Yes, I am, where you calling from Katti?
<Katti> The windy city Chicago.
<AnAngel> :)) Ohhhh well I'm your neighbor over in Michigan.
<Katti> Really, so you don't live in the middle east?
<Katti> Goodness no, American born and bred right here in gods land of Michigan. :)
Katti had to smile to herself.

<Katti> excuse me but what is that mark you are doing the dots and the line?
<AnAngel> This :) it's a smilly face in puter talk and this is a sad face :( hehehe just
some silly thing they came up with to give the key board a personality I guess.
<Katti> :) I see.
<AnAngel> I see you catch on pretty fast. So, what would you like to chat about
this evening?
<Katti> Oh, you don't have to keep me company. I am sure you have many things to
do.
<AnAngel> Ahhhh but for the moment you are my quest in life. To get to know you
and to keep you company or have you keep me company in these wee hours of the
morning.
<Katti> :)
So for the next two hour's they talked AnAngel was polite and energetic and made
Katti smile often. Something about the conversation. Katti didn't understand herself
but she was sitting here telling this female her whole life story and the woman was
listening. As the tears flowed down Katti's cheeks the words kept coming, type
type type went the keys. Once she thought she was borning AnAngel, but no Angel
assured her there was nothing more important than being here with her at this very
moment in time.

The morning sun, gleemed through the blinds in the corner of the livingroom where
Katti sat.

<Katti> Oh my god! I must have kept you from sleeping. Didn't you say you had to
work in the morning. I am sooo sorry.
<AnAngel> Sometimes life is strange but there is always a meaning in what we do
and I was brought here just for you to talk to. So don't worry about me. I have
found a new friend and I hope you come back often. But! yes I do have to get
going to work. They both bid each other goodnight or rather goodmorning and
Katti clicked closed the screen but not before making AnAngel a promise to return
that evening.

Crawling into the bed and slipping a sheet over her, Katti smile for the first time in
quite a while. Thinking of AnAngel brought a smile to Katti's lips and she fell asleep
to a deep calm sleep. When she woke  the evening was just coming upon her again.
She thought about AnAngel. Something about talking to the lady made her feel
comfortable. She thought she would do some work and then check out the site
to see if her new friend had come back.  With some coffee into her, Katti hit the
computer again. First checking the email. Everyday there was ton's of it from one
client or another. Yet the screen seemed to flash out AnAngel  (Goodmoring)
Surprisedm not even remembering she had given her e-mail address Katti
opened the log.

Dear New Friend

It was so nice meeting you last evening, I feel we are about to embark on a new
error for you into the field of cyber friends. I had a wonderful time talking to you.
I regreat with all my heart and soul the pain that has befallen upon you, yet our
God has assured me that you are about to see some wonderful changes in life.
Do not feel my crazy for talking with my Lord, for he is always with me and I
will bring him back to be with you. We are about to share dreams and hopes
and wonderful thoughts of the future together. I would love you to come and
meet some wonderful ppl in the channel's I hang out in. Do you have the pro-
gram MIRC. It's a chatting program allowing you to talk to ppl around the
world. If not go to this site www. mirc.com and download the latest version.
Once  you have it downloaded. Type /server irc.dal.net to log on. Once on
choose a nick and don't for get to register it by typing  /msg nickserv register
(password). It's as simple as that and we are in business. Come find me in
a channel called  Jordan but type a # before the word jordan. If I am not
there wait for me my friend for I will have no thoughts except to find you there
this evening. If you find a nick (nickname) Boldheart, Passanger or Brave^^Heart
please feel free to talk to them. They will welcome you and care for you until
I arrive. Good luck and don't you dare let me down. :))))))) That's a big smile.
Gotta run, God Bless you Katti.

Alexandria.

Katti sat there smiling, at what she was not quite sure, but something told her
she was about to find out. Her day went wonderful, her work seemed to
just flow the whole evening went rather well. Katti was excited for some
reason as the time approached 9:00 p.m. the designated meeting time Katti
found she wanted to talk to this woman that called herself AnAngel. Alexandria
was Angels name, hmmmm she thought to herself. A connection there, Alexandria
was a strong name, and AnAngel was the gentle nick. Two sides to this woman.

Fixing something to eat, grabbing a coke, Katti pulled up the chair before the
computer and did just as she was told to do. She downloaded MIRC and entered
the DALnet server and typed /join #Jordan.