Coffee And Baptism
Ben Bogard, a Baptist debater wrote the following poem to demonstrate
that Scriptural baptism requires immersion in water. After reading
the poem, my brother W. Curtis Porter, wrote a sequel demonstrating
that baptism was also essential to salvation.
The Preacher's Coffee
I have a pleasant story, which I wish to tell in rhyme,
About a circuit preacher, who lived in recent time.
He was a circuit rider, for good John Wesley's brand,
And rode the finest circuit, in all the blessed land.
At one of his good charges, some members, not a few,
Became quite sorely troubled, about the word "into."
The good Book say quite plainly, in Acts in chapter eight,
"They went down into the water," as Baptist people
state.
The preacher preached a sermon, of extra zeal and might,
And to his satisfaction, he set the passage right.
"Into" does not mean "into," but only "at"
or "near by,"
They went down to the water, and got a small supply.
But near the place of worship, there lived a sister Brown,
And for her splendid cooking, she'd gained a great
renown.
Her yellow-legged chickens, her luscious cakes and pies,
Had often made that preacher, roll up his weeping
eyes.
And her delicious coffee, in all the circuit round,
The preacher oft admitted, its like could not be found.
So when he preached his sermon with extra power and length,
He loved, at the Brown's table, to revive his ebbing
strength.
But sister Brown was a Baptist, the strongest in the land,
She oft reproved the Methodists, for changing God's
command.
She heard the preacher's sermon, and thought the subject o'er,
Then asked him home for dinner, as she oft had done
before.
She ground her good brown coffee, her kettle steaming hot,
And she put it "at" or "near by," the
famous coffee pot.
She poured her guest a cupful, (I think it was no sin),
"But you forgot, dear sister, to put the coffee
in."
"No, no, dear sir, that's coffee, I ground a good supply,
And put it at' the kettle, ("into" is "at"
or "near by").
By the logic of your sermon: (I thought it rather thin),
If "at" or "near by" is "into," I put
to coffee in.
So if you will truly promise, no more such stuff to teach,
I'll go and make some coffee, in line with Bible speech.
And this time I will follow, instructions to the dot,
And put the coffee "into," not "at" or "near by"
the pot.
Ben M. Bogard, Baptist preacher
Sequel To The Preacher's Coffee
Just then in stepped a preacher, who wears a Bible name,
The simple name of "Christian," of apostolic
fame.
God put into the Bible, no human names to wear,
And hence he was contented, the inspired mark to wear.
Then Mrs. Brown he questioned, if surely she'd admit,
Whether "into" had the meaning she had given
it.
She said she would most surely, and who would dare say not?
"No coffee's in the vessel, till put "into"
the pot!
Then gently spoke the preacher, "Don't censure preacher Jones,
You have spoken condemnation, to yourself in strongest
tones.
No need to hold tradition, such never did suffice,
The Bible says that baptism, puts people "into"
Christ.
"No, no" replied the hostess, "Such preaching is a sin,
Sir, the preacher gives baptism, to those already
in."
"Well, well," then spoke the preacher, "It surely gives
me fun,
To see this faithful Baptist, throw down her Baptist
gun.
If "into" has the meaning, you have given it at last,
Your shot at circuit riders, has gone into a blast!
Then Philip and the eunuch, went not "into" the creek,
For they were "in" already, and had been for
a week!
When Christians are invited "into" that heavenly clime,
They'll really not go "into," they were in
it all the time.
And when the Lord will banish the wicked "into" hell,
They'll merely stay in pleasures, on earth they love
so well.
You thought you put the coffee, "into" the coffee pot,
But it was "in" already, and really boiling
hot.
Now, Mrs. Brown please promise that you'll not have the gall,
To hit folks with the Bible, unless you take it all.
The Bible says so plainly (to which you have referred,)
"They went down into the water," I trust its
every word.
It tells us that the righteous, to "into" mansions fair,
It tells us that the wicked, go down "into"
despair.
It tells us as surely, not only once, but twice,
That that which is called baptism, puts people "into"
Christ.
Now take it all, dear lady, false preachers you can rout,
Or else just raise the window, and throw the Bible
out!
W. Curtis Porter
For years my brethren have been trying to get folks
to see that the final act of the "new birth of the water and of the
Spirit" involves water baptism which is immersion (John 3:3-5)
The design of it is "unto" or "for" the remission of alien
sins (Acts 2:38). To wash away sins (Acts 22:16). Into Christ
(Romans 6:3-4; Galatians 3:26-27). Into the one body (1 Corinthians
12:13). It is to be saved (Mark 16:16; 1 Peter 3:20-21). Still,
the majority of our religious neighbors teach that man is saved "by
faith alone." Such is written in the various creeds of most of the
Protestant churches.
The following argument I believe is un-get-around-able!
When our Lord instituted His memorial supper (called also communion),
He took the fruit of the vine after they finished the "last supper"
and said the following: "...drink from it, all of you. For this is My
blood of the new covenant, which is shed for many for the remission of
sins" (Matthew 26:27b-28).
You can't help but notice, it appears to me,
that Peter told believers to "repent and be baptized" (immersed)
for the same reason that Jesus shed His precious blood on Calvary's cross!
It was "for the remission of sins" (Acts 2:38). Both in the Greek
and in English this means looking forward to or in order to the remission
of sins. If believers are to "repent and be immersed because their
sins have already been forgiven" (as we are told by most Protestants)
then to be consistent, they would have to teach that "Jesus shed His
blood because we were already saved." The fact is, no one but
a "died in the wool" Calvinist would dare say that Jesus died only
for the elect who were chosen to salvation before the foundation of the
world. Most recognize that Jesus died "in order to" the forgiveness
of our sins and not because they were forgiven already! Too, most know
He died for "whosoever" (John 3:16; Hebrews 2:9) or that He "tasted
of death for every man," and since "God is no respecter of persons"
(Acts 10:34-35; Romans 2:11), and since He desires that all be saved
and come to a knowledge of the truth (1 Timothy 2:1-4; 2 Peter 3:9),
the Calvinist position cannot possible be true.
My brethren and I place no greater significance
on water baptism than we do on any other commandment of our Lord as
given in His worldwide commission. (Matthew 28:18-20; Mark 16:15-16;
Luke 24:45-49); Neither do we dare give it less significance
than Hearing the truth of the gospel. Believing those truths
as taught by inspired men. Repenting of every sin and error, Confessing
the blessed name of Jesus as the Christ. Then and only then is one
a fit subject for the final act of the "new birth" of the water
and of the Spirit, Baptism. This baptism is "into the name"
of Jesus Christ (1 Corinthians 1:10-13; 3:1-6; 1 Peter 4:16; Acts 4:11-12;
Acts 26:28). This scriptural baptism reconciles one unto God
"in the one body by the cross" (Ephesians 2:13-17).
For further study about these matters, just give
us a call at 347-3582 or 347-5645. You may e-mail me at kthomas@dpc.net
With love for precious souls, Kenneth E. Thomas