To know me, is to understand me.



In 1968 I had the privelege of seeing man's inhumanity to man. The Vietnam War was in full swing. The stench of war was everywhere. There was no escaping it when you arrived. As a Laboratory Technician, I was about to embark on a very different avenue of life.

There are tens of thousands who had it worse than I as far as conditions. I only had to see the carnage as it rolled into our Hospital. I didn't have to see them killed and maimed in action. Yet to my soul, it hurt just as badly to see the suffering on both sides.


DODGE.. we called this 9 yr old Vietnamese boy by that name because he was run over by a Deuce and a half (2 1/2 ton army truck). He had two spots exposed where I could draw blood for his lab tests, the rest was covered in bandages and casts. His eyes teared whenever he saw me coming, because he knew I was going to take a blood sample. None of us wanted to see his name come up on our daily round ticket. We knew how painful it was for him.
Yet thru all that pain, Dodge could still laugh and he did get through all that broken body to go on. I wonder where Dodge is now? I wonder if his eyes would tear as he saw me?

INCOMING CASUALTIES!!!



A head screaming through the partially opened door of the lab, late at night. I don't even know what time it is. How long have I been asleep on this cot? I was hoping to make it through the graveyard shift tonight without any work.
Simon and Garfunkel, "Bookends", was playing on my reel to reel tape player. I knew every word to that album. Just start the 6 hour reel and fall asleep. You know the songs by heart after a while, it's imbedded in your subconscious after listening to it in your sleep night after night..
We sleep in our clothes on night duty. You have to be ready to run anywhere, anytime.
I grabbed my blood drawing tray and headed down the sidewalk towards the Emergency Room. A Chopper has landed and its' noisy blades fills the air like thunder. Over the top of the ER shed, I can see lights lined up. A couple more Choppers are waiting to unload their human cargo.
Opening the door and walking into the ER it is mayhem.. Most of the triage beds are filled. People are rushing all over. No one seems in charge yet. I don't remember if a Dr. or Nurse told me go to over to this one bed or not. I was just there.
You don't draw blood in the ER. Needles aren't necessary. You just hold the tube under the wound. It fills on it's own. If they are in shock, you will never hit a vein, they have collapsed, and there is no blood pressure to get one up. Just look for a wound to capture the blood pouring out.
Walking up to the bed, I see a kid, about 8 to 10 years old. A civilian. Seems the VC hit a village for ratting on them, and there are no GI's in this group. All civilians in the wrong place at the wrong time.
He looked at me, and never took his eyes off me. Just a blank stare, no emotion at all shown from that little boy. A pathetic old man, had to be his grandfather, stood behind him at the head of the bed. The old man never said a word through it all, his face showing no emotion. As if he'd been through this before, or knew what was coming. The boy couldn't see him and I don't know if he knew he was there at all. I figure the old man had to be injured some way, or he'd never have gotten on the Chopper to begin with. But the child was my concern.
His neck was bandaged and soaked with blood. The bandage had slipped down and blood was flowing out of the side of his neck. The bed was beginning to soak with it.
I reached out and grabbed the boys hand, it's so cold! He isn't going to make it. His blood loss has been too much for that frail little body.
All I can do is smile at him, this is my only contribution as no nurses or doctors are going to take the time. If my eyes said "Don't be afraid of death, go gently.", then it may have helped him. The eyelids closed slowly and his breathing stopped, a limp little hand no longer holding on for life.
Grandfather knew what had happened, still stony in his appearance. Someone shouted for help, and I had to move on. The rest of the night was a blur and I don't even remember what else happened.




29 Years Later

Sitting beside his bed.. just me and you.
A cold hand lying ever so lightly in mine.
His eyes so heavy... soul slipping..
My eyes glued to his face and slow heaving chest.
Finally no movement...
God! Not again?
Dad? Dad?






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