KINDERGARTEN TEACHER: To get to the other side.
PLATO: For the greater good.
ARISTOTLE: It is the nature of chickens to cross roads.
KARL MARX: It was a historical inevitability.
TIMOTHY LEARY: Because that's the only trip the establishment would let it take.
SADDAM HUSSEIN: This was an unprovoked act of rebellion and we
were quite justified in dropping 50 tons of nerve gas on it.
RONALD REAGAN: I forgot.
CAPTAIN JAMES T. KIRK: To boldly go where no chicken has gone before.
HIPPOCRATES: Because of an excess of phlegm in its pancreas.
ANDERSEN CONSULTING: Deregulation of the chicken's side of the Road
was
threatening its dominant market position. The chicken was faced with
significant challenges to create and develop the competencies required
for
the newly competitive market. Andersen Consulting, in a partnering
relationship with the client, helped the chicken by rethinking its
physical
distribution strategy and implementation processes.Using the Poultry
Integration Model (PIM), Andersen helped the chicken use its skills,
methodologies, knowledge, capital and experiences to align the chicken's
people, processes and technology in support of its overall strategy
within a
Program Management framework. Andersen Consulting convened a diverse
cross-spectrum of road analysts and best chickens along with Anderson
consultants with deep skills in the transportation industry to Engage
in a
two-day itinerary of meetings in order to leverage their Personal knowledge
capital, both tacit and explicit, and to enable them to Synergize with
each
other in order to achieve the implicit goals of delivering and successfully
architecting and implementing an enterprise-wide value framework across
the
continuum of poultry cross-median processes. The meeting was held in
a
park-like setting, enabling and creating an impactful environment which
was
strategically based, industry-focused, and built upon a consistent,
clear,
and unified market message and aligned with the chicken's mission,
vision,
and core values. This was conducive towards the creation of a total
business
integration solution. Andersen Consulting helped the chicken change
to
become more successful.
LOUIS FARRAKHAN (chef des Musulmans aux USA): The road, you see,
represents the black man. The chicken 'crossed' the black man in
order to trample him and keep him down.
MARTIN LUTHER KING, JR.: I envision a world where all chickens
will be free to cross roads without having their motives called into
question.
MOSES: And God came down from the Heavens, and He said unto the
chicken, "Thou shalt cross the road." And the chicken crossed the
road, and there was much rejoicing.
FOX MULDER (inspecteur "Aux frontihres du riel"): You saw it cross
the road with your own eyes. How many more chickens have to cross
the road before you believe it?
RICHARD M. NIXON: The chicken did not cross the road. I repeat,
The chicken did NOT cross the road.
MACHIAVELLI: The point is that the chicken crossed the road. Who
cares why? The end of crossing the road justifies whatever motive there
was.
JERRY SEINFELD: Why does anyone cross a road? I mean, why doesn't
anyone ever think to ask, What the heck was this chicken doing walking
around all over the place, anyway?"
FREUD: The fact that you are at all concerned that the chicken
crossed the road reveals your underlying sexual insecurity.
GATES: I have just released the new Chicken Office 2000, which
will not only cross roads, but will lay eggs, file your important
documents, and balance your checkbook.
OLIVER STONE: The question is not, "Why did the chicken cross
the road?" Rather, it is, "Who was crossing the road at the same
time, whom we overlooked in our haste to observe the chicken crossing?"
DARWIN: Chickens, over great periods of time, have been naturally
selected in such a way that they are now genetically disposed to cross
roads.
EINSTEIN: Whether the chicken crossed the road or the road moved
Beneath the chicken depends upon your frame of reference.
BUDDHA: Asking this question denies your own chicken nature.
RALPH WALDO EMERSON: The chicken did not cross the road .. it transcended it.
ERNEST HEMINGWAY: To die. In the rain.
COLONEL SANDERS: I missed one?
CLINTON : I did not, and I repeat, I did not have sexual relations with the
chicken.
HELMUT KOHL: I gave the chicken my word of honour not to tell why it crossed
the road
JOHN WAYNE: A chicken has to do what a chicken has to do