The Times
...is read by the people who run the country.
The Daily Mirror
...is read by the people who think they run the country.
The Guardian
...is read by the people who think they ought to run the country.
The Morning Star [a
Communist newspaper]
...is read by the people who think the country ought to be run
by another country.
The Daily Mail
...is read by the wives of the people who run the country.
The Financial Times
...is read by the people who own the country.
The Daily Express
...is read by the people who think the country ought to be run
as it used to be run.
The Daily Telegraph
...is read by the people who still think it is.
The Sun
Their readers don't care who runs the fucking country providing
she's got big tits.
The Daily Star
Their readers don't care who runs the fucking country either,
providing her tits are bigger and in colour.
Other newspapers:
Daily Sport
Independent
Today