I Have Changed

I have changed since a year ago
even much since just yesterday
I do not see you in the same light
I've got big shoulders, it's okay.

I have changed and I have seen
things I'd never thought I'd see
I've heard dark desperate words
and felt anger rip through me.

I have given way to tears
and dreamed of different times
I have frightened myself, driving
without headlights to see the signs.

I have changed since this morning
when I threw up my arms and cursed
the very day I met you, but if you were
to come tonight, I'm well-rehearsed.

I have changed and bite my tongue
where I would speak the truth in haste
having to hold back my thoughts from you
withered respect and numbed my taste.

Yes, I have changed since the better days
when I was blind for you and so still-

but you'll throw your realities and never see
you changed right along with me-
you say that I'm the one deranged
but at least I will admit I've changed

but you...you never will.
1