We walked out of the park until we reached downtown. She
told me where she stayed and so we headed in that direction.
I needed to tell her of her sickness. How do you tell someone
they are already dead, their body just hasn't figured it out yet. I wanted
to help her, but also had to tell her I didn't know if I could. "Caroline, I
have seen images of your life in my mind. I felt your loneliness and your
pain. I want to help you to not be lonely or afraid anymore. I too have
been alone for many, many years. The man that changed me left me
alone. He didn't stay and teach me, or help me learn how to take care of
myself. I have been alone for more then twenty years now and I have
learned everything the hard way. I have not met any others like me, nor
have I wanted to change anyone to be like me, until now. I feel a
sickness in you, Caroline. One that will take your life. I don't want to
be alone anymore and I want to offer to make you well. I am not sure I
can succeed. If you want to let me try I will. But I have to be honest
and tell you I am not sure of the outcome. I cannot drink from you and
then let you take my blood as I was changed. But I can drain your
blood from you, then let you drink from me. " I paused awhile and let
my words sink in before I went on. She seemed to be very calm. I didn't
know if that was a good sign or not. I was trying to read her thoughts,
but could not. I got glimpses of things, but could not read what she was
thinking at that moment.
"How did you know I was sick? How could you know that? I
haven't known for very long and I told no one." She had stopped
walking and was looking at me.
I was surprised that she was aware of her illness. She knew she
had the HIV virus yet she still let men pick her up each night. I must
have looked surprised because she answered me before I could even
ask her why.
"Men have hurt me all my life. Why should I care if I make
them sick? Does that shock you? Does it make you look at me
different? I have never had a man ever treat me with respect or touch
me without hurting. I hate men. All men." She turned away then and
started to walk again.
"I have seen some of your life, Caroline. I was just surprised
that you knew. I am certainly not one to judge you. If you want to
come with me, become like me, no man will ever hurt you again." I had
said enough and she now needed to decide.
"If you change me and it works, will I live forever and never
die?" she asked me very quietly.
"I have lived for more than twenty years and not changed at all
in that much time. When Martin changed me his only words were
'welcome to eternity'. He then laughed and went away. So I can only
answer I think so."
She thought for a long time and when she looked at my face
again I knew she had made up her mind.
"I have never been able to defend myself against the creeps that
have hurt me. I would like to know I could take care of myself, to
know that no one would ever hurt me again. I am dying already... what
have I got to lose? If it doesn't work, I want you to promise me
something." She looked into my eyes then and all I did was nod to her.
We both knew what she meant. I would end it painlessly for her. She
would not even know she was gone until she opened her eyes and saw
God. If indeed there was a God up there, he would have to grant her
peace after the life she had lived.
I told her it could be done whenever she was ready. She could
go and say good-bye to anyone she would miss, or pick up anything she
wanted to get. It made my heart ache for her to shake her head no.
We changed directions and headed off to where I stayed.
When we arrived I took her in and helped her clean up.The
creeps had torn her clothing and got her pretty scraped up in the park.
She found some of my things to wear while I made her something to
drink. I added a little something to help her sleep. I didn't want the next
few hours to be any more traumatic for her than they had to be. When
she came out and sat down, I told her what I would do and she said she
was ready.
I took her into the bathtub. I thought it would be the easiest
place to let her blood drain. We got a pillow and made her comfortable.
I sat with her and talked while I waited for the drug to take effect. She
told me more of her life, making me all the more sure this was the right
thing. I don't know why I had been drawn to her but I was going to try
to make her well. I wanted her to be strong so she would never have to
put up with pimps or creeps again ever.
When she closed her eyes and didn't open them, I cut her
jugular. Just a small cut enough to let the blood flow. Then I waited. I
held her wrist in my hand and felt her pulse slowing. When it had
almost stopped, I cut my finger and touched the wound on her neck,
closing it without a mark. I cut my wrist and placed it over her mouth.
She didn't respond right away and I willed her to drink. 'Drink
Caroline.Take my gift I am offering you. Don't let the sweet blackness
take you away from me.' She finally started sucking on my wrist and I
let her drink till I felt faint. When I made her stop she closed her eyes.
She slept for a long time, a fitful, restless sleep. It was hours before she
opened her eyes. When she did she was very pale. She could not talk,
but she smiled at me. I let her drink again from me. When she slept this
time it seemed to be a restful sleep. She woke with a fire in her eyes she
didn't have before. I needed to drink from her. I could no longer sense
the sickness in her, but I had to be sure. If I drank from her and didn't
become ill then we would know. She lifted her wrist to me, reading my
thoughts. I closed my eyes, and placed her wrist to my lips and bit. Her
blood was so sweet, even if it was mostly mine. I had never had a
vampires blood before. It was richer and much more satisfying than any
mortal I had ever drank. I only drank enough to feel the warmth flow
into my belly. I cut my finger, running my blood across her wrist. In
time, when she was stronger her body would do that on it's own. Then
we sat together and waited.
After watching the moon make its way across the night sky and
down over the horizon, we slept. Both of us weak, but knowing we would
never again be alone.