RANDOM THOUGHTS....
RANDOM THOUGHTS.... -What is an anti-hero? Isn't it the same as a villain?
-Rhode Island...it's neither a road, nor an island... go figure
-If practice makes perfect, and nobody's perfect, then why practice?
-What is a free gift...... aren't all gifts free?
-Why is it that when you wake up because you're thirsty and go get something to drink, you have to pee? And when you do you're not thirsty anymore and your drink goes to waste?
-Why is it that when you're hot... everyone's cold? And when you're cold... everyone's hot?
-How come, when a check bounces, the bank charges you for money you don't even have?
-Why do people screw the lid back on soda bottles when they're about to throw it away? (???)
-Does a bug notice when it gets stepped on?
-Why do they call it "taking a dump"? You're leaving it! And where would you take it?
-Why do we wash towels if we're clean when we use them??
-When signmakers go on strike, what do they use in the picket lines?
-What would happen if you tried to cut a ginsu knife with another ginsu knife?
-What's the point of wearing scented or unscented deodorant? I mean...if you wanted to smell 'regular' you'd just go without, right? (brought to my attention by Stephanie)
USEFUL SAYINGS....
-A towel is absolutely the most useful thing in existence.
-Duct tape can fix nearly anything.
-Always carry a suitcase in your trunk in case you wake up in a strange place.
-If you close your eyes, lower your head, put a lot of pressure on your temples, and think really hard...... you'll get a really bad headache....
-Nervousness is good because it clears the mind, Overconfidence is bad because it gets people nothing but trouble...
-If you think you're crazy... you're not...... but it's the people -Don't complain about the things you can't change (throw temper tantrums ^_^)
-If you treat people like crud, you'll get crud... so treat them like a million bucks!
-Love is a conveyor belt of warmth... now I have no idea what that means, feel free to mail me if you know...
who think that they're sane that you've gotta worry about... (hey, I KNOW that I'm crazy...)
THINGS YOU NEVER WANNA HEAR...
-your girlfriend say... "was that it?!?" (Not that I'd know, and get those dirty thoughts out of your head, I was talking about Titanic...)
-your girlfriend say... "I played truth or dare with your two best friends, and here's what happened"... (this one actually happened to me)
-a tour guide say... "...and directly behind you is the cat I just smashed........ no flash photography please..."
-your new prison cellmate, who has arms bigger than your thighs say... "you're new huh? Gotta boyfriend?"
-your doctor (while operating) say... "What the #&%$ IS that???" or "I'm bored... wanna go grab a taco, nurse?"
-The guy at the post office say... "Hey, Joe!!! Have you seen my uzi?"
-I don't care what anyone says............
-Elvis isn't dead, he's just gone home......
-Anyone who "whispers to all" (in a chat room) should be shot.
-No comment IS a comment!
OPINIONS..... Everyone's Got One
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