Here is the All-Music Guide's guide to Helen Humes.
This page contains lyrics to the following song(s):
Recorded in November 1927, when she was just fourteen years old (eat your heart out Jonny Lang). Times change; it's hard to imagine anyone recording "un-P.C." lyrics like these today...
From the CD "The Chronological Helen Humes 1927-1945" on the French "Classics" label.
Got one superstition, that's the one I really prize (2x) I don't like nobody, who's got a pair of mean cross eyes Said a cross-eyed man, hateful as a man could be (2x) Slept with his eyes open, always lookin' cross at me Gee but he was ugly, eyed me every way I turned (2x) I could feel him lookin', Lawdy how his eyes did burn Cross eyes make me shiver, cause they're so evil, low and mean (2x) Hateful as the devil, weariest eyes I've ever seen Folks who's got them cross eyes, things they see in vain Folks who's got them cross eyes, things they see is always wrong That's why me and cross eyes never gonna get along If I'd see a cross-eyed person, I was about to meet (2x) I'd just cross my finger, then I'd walk across the street
Recorded 20 November 1944. From the CD Classics 892 (Helen Humes 1927-1945).
I WOULD IF I COULD (Feather) Now I would if I could but honey I can't no more Yes I would if I could but honey I can't no more I can't get no cooperation, the way I did before Why I would if I could but you've got me in your power Yes I would if I could but you've got me in your power Yes I'd do it in a minute, but I'd rather take a solid hour Now you're gettin' slow an' easy You're as patient as can be You don't ask for too much lovin' and that's just what's botherin' me Tell me papa papa, just what are we waitin' for Yes I would if I could but I don't get a chance no more Now I listened to your lies, They don't mean a thing to me They might satisfy a square But I'm too hip you see So it's back to the apple, and find me a better man Well I would if I could, but damn if I think I can
This R&B song was recorded in the 1940's for Mercury Records. You can find it on the 7-CD set "Mercury - the 1940s" (the set that is shaped like a radio receiver).
JET PROPELLED PAPA (Helen Humes - Williams) I've got a jet propelled papa with a magic ray Yes I've got a jet propelled papa with a magic ray He'll put your head in a spin and take your breath away Now when he gets started There's nothing left to keep All your love will explode When he turns on the heat Fast like a rocket, he's built for any meat He's my jet propelled papa with supersonic speed He's a jet propelled papa with a swing and a sway When he makes contact the world just fades away When you get hurried he can really put you there No, he don't need no refuelling, he can even burn air He's my jet propelled papa, he's got that atomic touch What that man hasn't got don't 'mount to very much Yes he's my papa, he's just like a shooting star And when that man takes off you can't tell just where you are
Recorded 20 November 1944; from the CD Classics 892, "Helen Humes 1927-1945".
KEEP YOUR MIND ON ME (Feather) I've got a high class daddy, he wants to love me with his soul I've got a high class daddy, he wants to love me with his soul He calls it intellectual romance, but I call it just plain jelly roll Now there's love that's in the heart, and there's love that's in the head Yes there's love that's in the heart, and there's love that's in the head One gives you action, and the other gives you words instead Mmm, emotion devotion, they don't mean a thing you see Emotion devotion, they don't mean a thing you see As long as there's some motion, Lord that's good enough for me Say your mind is fine, and your body's mellow as can be Baby your mind is fine, and your body's mellow as can be So I'll keep my mind on you if you'll keep your mind on me
Recorded in 1973 in Paris with her All Stars, including Arnett Cob (tenorsax), Jay McShann (piano), Milt Buckner (organ), Clarence "Gatemouth" Brown (guitar), Roland Lobligeois on bass and Paul Gunther on drums. From Black & Blue LP 33.711
I'm gonna tell all you girls a secret, please keep it to yourself I'm gonna tell all you girls a secret, please, please keep it to yourself Why it's a million dollar secret, so please don't tell nobody else Now if you're a real young girl And you want to get rich quick Get an old, old man, girls And that'll be the lick You know those old men are fine, yes they know just what to do They'll give you lots of loving, but they'll give you a whole lot of money too (and I love that part) Now he'll tickle you under your chin And he'll scratch you on your side He'll say "Wake up you fine young thing Give me my morning's exercise" Those old men are fine, yes yes yes they know what to do They'll give you lots of loving, but they'll give you a whole lot of money too Now I've got a man who's seventy-eight And I'm just thirty-three Everybody thinks I'm crazy But his will's made out to me! Yes that man is fine, girls he really knows just what to do Why he'll give you lots of loving, but he'll give you a whole lot of money too (solos) Now I've told all you young girls Exactly what to do Now let me tell you women If you're over forty-two Get you a young dude, and raise him to your hand Cause he'll make you think life is wonderful, yes you'll think the world is grand Now take a look in the barnyard See that old fat hen She's got a fresh young rooster Feels just like a chick again So get a young man, and raise him to your hand Cause he'll make you think life is wonderful, yes you'll think the world is grand You know he'll spend your hard-earned money Make your life a hell on earth But when he takes you in his arms Girls you'll get your money's worth So get a young man, and raise him to your hand Cause he'll make you think life is wonderful, yes you'll think the world is grand
This double-entendre song is from Black & Blue LP 33.711 (see also Million Dollar Secret). An early version (perhaps the original?) of this song was recorded by Ethel Waters in 1928.
Whoever said a good man is hard to find Positively absolutely sure was blind I've found the best man there ever was Here's just some of the things that my man does Why he shakes my ashes, greases my grittle Chimes my butter and he strokes my fiddle My man is such a handy man (oh yes he is) He threads my needle, creams my wheat Heats my heater and he chops my meat My man is such a handy man Now I don't care if you believe it or not He's so good to have around And when my furnace gets too hot He's right there and turns my damper down Why for everything he's got a scheme You oughta see that new stuff he uses on my machine That man is such a handy man (he's God's gift girls) Why he flaps my flapjacks, cleans off my table Feeds my horses out in my stable That man is such a handy man, mmm yeah Sometimes he's up long before the dawn Busy trimmin' the rough edges off my front lawn Yeah that man is such a handy man Why you know he never has a single word to say No not while he's working hard And I wished that you could see the way He handles my front yard Yeah you know my ice don't get a chance to melt away Cause he sees that I get that fresh piece every day My man, my man is such a handy man And I ain't kiddin'!
This R&B song was recorded with Buck Clayton's Orchestra in the 1940's for Mercury Records. You can find it also on the set "Mercury - the 1940s". I'm not sure if the line with "King Kong" is correct; is that the name of a drink?
THEY RAIDED THE JOINT (Dan Burley) They raided the joint, took everybody down but me Yes they raided the joint, took everybody down but me I was over in the corner just as high as I could be Now some were playing blackjack, some were playing skin I had plenty money but they wouldn't let me in Yes they raided the joint, took everybody down but me I was over in the corner just as high as I could be They treated me like a stranger, like a dirty dog Ate up all the chops, gave me the tail of the hog Then they raided the joint, took everybody down but me I was over in the corner just as high as I could be Now they were drinking gin, drinking mighty fast They offered me some King Kong [?], but I couldn't find a glass They raided the joint, took everybody down but me I was over in the corner just as high as I could be Now some were drinking whiskey, some were drinking rhum They had some sneaky peep but they wouldn't give me none Yes they raided the joint, took everybody down but me I was over in the corner, knocked out as I could be Now gee it sure was funny, the best I ever saw They heard somebody knocking and in walked the law They raided the joint, took everybody down but me I was over in the corner just as high as I could be Now they were dancing in the kitchen, boogin' in the hall Boy down the cordon tell the judge about it all They raided the joint, took everybody down but me I was over in the corner, high as I could be
Helen Humes recorded this song at least twice, on 9 February 1942 and in the summer of 1945; first with Pete Brown and his Band (released on Decca), and then with the Bill Doggett Octet (released on Philo). Both recordings are on the CD "Helen Humes 1927-1945" on the French Classics label.
UNLUCKY WOMAN (Feather) I was born on Friday, married on Friday too Yes I was born on Friday, married on Friday too But I didn't believe in jinxes till the day that I met you I don't want no more lovin', I'd rather be all alone No i don't want no more lovin', I'd rather be all alone So when payday comes around, I can call my money my own Now love is just a gamble, it's just like shootin' dice But it's my bad luck that I got snake eyes twice I'm an unlucky woman, guess I was born that way And if anyone can change me, they can move right in today I don't want no more excuses, I don't want no jive I wouldn't want you daddy if you was the last man alive I've learned my lesson, and I've learned it just in time Good luck will never find me, till I cross you off my mind
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