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The section with a life of its own....

Like, Whatever!
REVEALED: The most analogies ever to be produced by American High School Student

The little boat gently drifted
across the pond exactly the way
a bowling ball wouldn't

McBride fell 12 stories and hit the pavement
like a Hefty Bag filled with vegetable soup

Bob was as perplexed as a hacker
who means to access
T:flw.quid55328.com\aaakk/ch@ung but gets
T:\flw.quidaaakk/ch@ung by mistake

Her vocabulary was as bad as, whatever

Her date was pleasant enough,
but she knew that if her life
was a movie this guy would be
buried in the credits as
something like "Second Tall Man"

John and Mary had never met
They were like two
hummingbirds who had
also never met

His thoughts tumbled in his head,
making and breaking alliances
like underpants in a dryer
without Cling Free

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Mind Your Language!

When Pepsi started marketing its
product in China, they translated their slogan,
"Pepsi brings you back to life"
pretty literally. The slogan in
Chinese really meant, "Pepsi brings
your ancestors back from the grave".

Coca-cola went one better, giving
their product a name which, when
pronounced in Chinese, sounded like
"Coca-Cola". The only problem was that
the characters used meant "Bite the
wax tadpole". They later changed the
name to set a characters that mean
"Happiness in the mouth".

Chicken magnate Frank Perdue's line
"It takes a tough man to make a tender
chicken", sounded much more interesting
when translated into Spanish: "It takes
a sexually stimulated man to make a
chicken affectionate".

Similarly, The Spanish version of
Coor's slogan "Turn it loose" was read as
"Suffer from diarrhoea".

Braniff translated a slogan touting
its upholstery, "Fly in leather". In Spanish
it meant "Fly naked".

When Vicks first introduced its cough
drops in Germany, they were upset to
learn that the German pronounciation of
"v" is "f" - making the brand names
the gutteral equivalent of
"sexual penetration"

Puffs tissues had similar trouble
when they learnt that "puff" in German
is a colloquial term for a whorehouse.
And the English weren't too fond of the
name, either.

The Chevy Nova never sold well
in Spanish-speaking countries, where
"no va" means "it doesn't go".

Hair products company Clairol
introduced the Mist Stick, a curling iron,
into Germany only to find out that "mist"
is slang for manure


Show me The Yuan!
Literal translation of subtitles in Chinese movies

Fatty, you with your thick face
have hurt my instep
Subtitle: Damn, I'll burn you
into a BBQ chicken!

Take my advice, or I'll
spank you without pants
Subtitle: You always use violence.
I should've ordered glutinous rice chicken

I have been scared shitless*
too much latelty
Subtitle: I got knife scars
more than the number
of your leg's hair

This will be of fine service for you,
you bag of the scum*.
I am sure you will not mind that I
remove your manhoods and leave them
out on the desert floor
for your aunts to eat
Subtitle: Yah-hah, evil spider
woman! I have captured you by the short rabbits
and can now deliver you violently to
your gynaecologist for a thorough
extermination

Guys, this is just a pure Laugh!!

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