Surgery Notes

Sir, So another season is behind us, and I for one would like to congratulate Claudio and his team on the excellent entertainment they have given us. Before I get carried away with my view of the season I would just like to shed some light on the Liverpool game. Fuck off Gerrard I had the great pleasure of attending the Liverpool game with Priesty and I left the ground more euphoric than I entered. However I might have been a little too merry as many of my match highlights were not reported in the press. I hugely enjoyed the game, especially as Willey the ref was on their side from the off, booking 3 of our players and giving the scallys every advantage he possibly could. I hope the FA look at his performance in great detail as it had to go down as the most one-sided refereeing displays since David Ellery last officiated at an FA Cup tie. Gerard Hoolahoop said after the match that he wished he had 2 or 3 Gerrards on the pitch ! Gerrard should be banned for a least 6 matches for his deliberate cynical scything down of Gianfranco. You are a disgrace Gerrard and should have been drowned at birth. None of the papers picked up on the fact that Dudek clearly handled the ball outside his area and should have been sent off. Priesty and I had a perfect view of the incident and had no hesitation in insisting that the ref red card him. No one ever doubted that Chelsea would spank a toothless Liverpool. They were lucky to score with their only attack and only good fortune and referee Willey prevented us racking up double figures. Onslow Square I would like to apologise to the residents of Onslow Square for Priesty's disgraceful public display of pot smoking and beer drinking in their lovely west London address. You would have though that he had grown out of such things by now but alas he still acts like a 17 year old herbert. Player of the year award Thierry Henry and Van Nistelrooy - players of the year? You knew it was a fucking joke when the short list was published - yes they nominated Gianfranco but where was Carlo? Let me take this opportunity to publicly applaud Carlo as the best player in Premiership. You know it's the truth. Farewell Albert So it's goodbye to Albert Ferrer. Thank you for everything you did for the club. I rate Albert very highly indeed and no one in their right mind can deny that he is the best tackler that has ever been seen in the Premiership. Also he showed the likes of that cunt Poyet how to leave a club with your head held high. Adios Chappie, you are welcome back anytime. Twelve Muppets No one can deny that the following represent the very worst of the Premiership: Peter Schmeichel - you are rubbish Lauren - horror tackle on Gianfranco Martin Keown - he's got a monkey's head Danny Mills - a fucking disgrace Gary Neville - what's with the 1930's spiv look? David Unsworth - angry thug Christian Ziege - how's the leg? Steven Gerrard - horror tackle on Gianfranco Thierry Henry - where's my lighter? Poyet - judas Teddy Sheringham - old man, old man Manager: Kevin Keegan, clueless Reasons to be cheerful X 10 Champions League, come to Daddy Jesper, goal machine Marcel, The Rock - what a 1st half against Liverpool ! Down with West Ham, going down with the West Ham Spurs, Played 38, lost 16 (9 at home), Goals conceded 62 ! Liverpool's mid season run, their worst in 49 years ! David O'Leary - lets see how long before the wheels fall off at Villa Portsmouth in the Premiership - 6 points to us Claudio Ranieri - the undisputed master of football Sir Kenneth Bates - 20 years at the helm, thanks for everything You see my point ? Dr Les. PS: See you in KL... My solicitors have advised me to make no comment. Suffice to say that all good things come to he who waits... Priesty.

© 2003 Priesty's Chelsea FC Refuge.