Underwear

After Solitaire by Jordan Mann

I go through my wife's closet with a sense of trepidation
I fear that she will catch me here, engrossed in new sensations
So I tightly close the closet door and sit down in her chair
And put on a pair of lacy underwear

Tradition says cross-dressing is a sinful occupation
But really, what's the matter with some harmless recreation?
I turn before the mirror and try on another pair
I'm glad my wife buys lacy underwear

The panties are dark green and there's some lace around the border
I reach down to adjust them and I put myself in order
I do a little soft-shoe dance and I'm without a care
In my lovely pair of lacy underwear

Tradition says cross-dressing is a sinful occupation
But I am weak and can't resist the silky soft temptation
That they're only made for women is so blatantly unfair
We all should have some lacy underwear

Once I was a boxer man
And wore briefs on laundry day
But briefs aren't sold in turquoise trimmed in gold
And I just think boxers are a little gay

I put the panties back into their usual disorder
And it's right then that I catch sight of the video recorder
I know I'm caught and so I wave into its one-eyed glare
My wife knows I wear lacy underwear

Tradition says a marriage can survive one partner lying
In the eight years we've been married, I've watched our sex life dying
But now she knows my secret, perhaps we'll get somewhere
'Cause she knows that I wear lacy underwear

I'm happier by far now, and I think it's more than fair
And I buy another pair
And I buy another pair
And I buy another pair...

Not repressed
(D'you) like my dress?
And it's ... off to work I go

June 30, 2003

Jordan's known me long enough that he should know it's dangerous to leave songs lying around.