Ack! I want to end this story once and for all!
*tears hair* But it won't let me! It's EVIL!
Like me ^^;; Anyhoo, I really do enjoy writing this
story, I just apologize to anyone who's wondering,
'where the heck is she going with this thing?'
Oy... I don't even know. Ask the story. ^^;;


Healer
Chapter 18
Author: Patch
E-mail: patchkhan1@hotmail.com
	kittiekat90@yahoo.com
Rated: PG

Insert standard disclaimer here.

	Rei slowly came awake with a heavy feeling
of disorientation. Her senses, it seemed, didn't feel sharp.
She felt lethargic almost. Blinking her eyes, she saw the
other Senshi also getting up. Something felt out of place 
and it was almost disturbing in a way. Suddenly, a bright light
hit her eyes and she cried out involuntarily from shock.
Shielding her eyes with one hand, she struggled to see 
the source. When her eyes fell upon Endymion and 
Serenity, she screamed the Princess' name in terror.
	It was then that she realized she could 
hardly move her limbs. It was as though they each 
weighed more than her own body weight. She looked 
to see her friends having trouble and then looked back
at the couple with fear clogging her throat. They 
couldn't lose Serenity again! However as suddenly as
the light had appeared, it diminished just as quickly.
Rei suddenly found the heavy gravity that had been
keeping her to the ground, gone and she scrambled
to get up. She saw everyone else do the same and 
ran up to Endymion and Serenity.
	"What in goddess' name happened?" 
Minako yelled, falling her to knees beside Endymion.
	"You wouldn't understand," Endymion 
replied quietly. "But look," he motioned for everyone 
to look down at the sleeping Princess.
	Serenity moaned and tossed her head a few
times slightly before her eyes slowly fluttered open. She 
looked up to see her friends' faces above her and to
everyone's surprise… she smiled.
	"Hello everyone."
	"Serenity!"
	She sat up and the girls embraced her
together. Once again the Generals and Endymion 
found themselves watching in the background, all 
too happy to see the joyful reunion. 
	"I am so happy to be with you all again,
you just cannot imagine," Serenity whispered, 
hugging each of her friends individually after the 
group had embraced as one. "So much time has 
passed, hasn't it? I remember everything…"
	"But how? How is this all possible?" Makoto
asked, wiping tears away from her eyes.
	"I… I honestly cannot say. I remember
my time at the circus, but I'm not sure how I got 
there. I remember all that I was put through, the
name they gave me, the things they made me do." 
She shuddered and then shook her head as if trying
to forget. She looked up, closing her eyes and
pressing her palm against her forehead. "I do 
remember the time before that also. I remember 
when Endymion…" she stilled and then turned 
quickly, finally taking notice of the men.
	"Endymion…"
	For what was probably the second 
time in his life, Endymion swallowed a lump in his 
throat out of sheer nervousness. The first had
been when he had wanted to approach a 
delegate's beautiful daughter when he was much 
younger. But that was nothing but a vague memory. 
He was now staring at the woman he loved… and
she was remembering the time he had rejected her. 
	"Princess…"
	There was a moment of silence and he 
watched her apprehensively, waiting for some sort 
of reaction. He knew the exact moment when she 
remembered. He saw the pain flash through her 
clear eyes as she recalled his final words to her on
that fateful day.
	"I cannot be that person… I'm sorry… 
I hope you understand…"
	He knew the exact moment those words
ran across her mind. They were running across his
memory too. And then he knew that she was feeling
the crushing sadness that followed in the aftermath, 
as he felt it at the same time. Their souls were
invariably linked and being in such close proximity, 
what one felt, the other experienced, the emotions
running freely through their veins. It was a 
knowledge that was amazing and almost 
incomprehensible.
	The Senshi and Generals did not say a 
word, curious to see what would come of this. Each
prayed fervently that it would be something positive.
Endymion hoped for the same but as he watched
Serenity closely, he was overwhelmed with doubt.
When he had made the decision that would allow
her to remember without the pain, he thought he 
hadn't known what to expect. Now he wondered if
he had actually known all along, but had chosen to 
deny the truth.
	He saw her expression crumble as she
regained all of her memories, and then as his heart 
sank, he watched her eyes harden, just as they had 
so long ago when she had ordered him to never
come near her again. He winced as her anger flowed
through him, reminding him of his past mistakes. His
fingers curled slightly and his own regret warred with
her anger. If only he could take back what he had 
said. If only he could erase that day from existence. 
But as he had told himself countless times before, 
the present was not the time to dwell on the past.
	"I'd like to go home." Her quiet voice 
broke through his reverie and brought him back
from his musings. She held his gaze for a moment 
longer and then turned to the Senshi. Her smile was 
shaky at best but her tone was steady and 
determined. "I miss Mother and Luna and Artemis
and Naru and…" she broke off and then took a 
deep breath. "I miss my home."
	Minako nodded and looked over the 
men, specifically waiting for Endymion to say 
something. He did.
	"We'll leave as soon as the sun rises. 
We still have a few hours until then so, even though 
it may be hard to do," he gave a quick smile to the
women, "I suggest that we all get whatever sleep 
we can so that we reach the Palace as soon as 
possible."
	Everyone nodded and Endymion turned 
his head upwards to look at his Generals who stood 
behind him. Kunzite placed a hand on the Prince's 
shoulder before walking away, the other three 
following him. Endymion turned back to the Senshi 
who were still sitting around Serenity. He looked at 
Minako who quickly searched his eyes before nodding 
slightly. Unnoticed by Serenity, she placed her hand 
on Rei's arm. The other girl nodded without making 
eye contact with Minako, understanding the message
that had been conveyed without words. Rei then 
shared a look with Makoto and Ami and they too 
nodded, comprehension dawning upon them. 
	Minako leaned over and hugged her
Princess once more. "We will speak to you in the
morning," she whispered, before pulling back and 
standing up with the other Senshi. Serenity looked 
at them in confusion, a frown marring her features.
	"Wait… where are you going?"
	Rei stopped and turned to look back. 
She smiled, saying, "To sleep, of course. You should 
too, it was your favorite pastime after all," she teased,
before turning back around.
	Serenity gasped in mock indignation and
smiled. "I'll get you for that," she called out. She then 
realized that Rei was leaving her. "But wait, I'll go with-"
	"Serenity."
	She stilled and closing her eyes, 
swallowed the lump in her throat. She had hoped to 
avoid this. "Yes, Endymion?"
	"Stay with me."
	Feeling a rush of emotions at all that those
words implied, she looked at the man who had cast 
off the love she had offered. His eyes, even in the 
dying light of the fire, had her shivering. It was his eyes
that had captured her attention so long ago. They had 
held such strength and determination. But now, oddly 
enough, they looked haunted.
	Was it because of her? She could
understand that he had been very worried when she 
had been taken but how much more had he felt? What
had he gone through to come this far? And… why had
he done it? The last question uas the foremost in her
mind. Had he come for her out of duty? Responsibility?
Or something else altogether?
	"Serenity?"
	She had to make a choice. Sleep was pulling 
at her and she couldn't stay awake for too much longer. 
Slowly shifting closer to Endymion, she let him pull her 
into his embrace as he lay back onto the ground. Resting 
her head on his shoulder, she looked out and noticed for
the first time that they were camped beside a lake. And
the still water reflected the large Moon beautifully tonight. 
	"Only for tonight, Endymion," she whispered,
tears forming at her eyes. "Only for tonight."
*~*
	
	"You have to speak with him, Serenity."
	Minako's quiet voice interrupted her thoughts 
and Serenity swiveled sideways to see that her friend 
had ridden up next to her. Seeing that she was the 
Senshi of Love and Beauty, Serenity figured that Minako
had good reason to tell her to do such a thing.
	"What's there to talk about Minako? 
Everything's been done and said."
	"That was a long time ago. Things have
changed quite a bit since then."
	Serenity eyed the girl suspiciously. "How 
so? And since when have you become such an
advocate for Endymion? Were you not the one who 
told me that kisses were just kisses? My feelings for
Endymion were simply that. Just feelings. Do you not
agree now?"
	Minako had the grace to blush and look 
away. "Like I said, things have changed. I have 
changed along with the others."
	Serenity nodded and smiled mischievously, 
glad to focus on something else. "I noticed. This 
morning, I wake up to see you in a deep conversation 
with Kunzite, Makoto touching Nephrite's hand before
walking away from him and Rei sharing breakfast with
Jaedite. And Ami!" Serenity swiveled the other way
around to pin a look on the Mercurian Senshi who 
had started upon hearing her name. "I see my sweet,
quiet friend kissing Zoicite in the copse of trees
nearby! I thought I would collapse in a faint since it 
was the first time I had ever seen such a forward 
action from you. Wouldn't you rather be more 
comfortable riding up in front with the General, himself
rather than riding here in the back with me?" she asked, 
winking. "Look, Makoto was brave enough to do
so!"
	Ami turned a bright red and covered her 
face with one hand. "Serenity, you are too much," she
murmured. "I remember how you and Minako
would tease me endlessly at the balls every time I 
danced with a man. I can see that you still haven't let
up."
	Serenity laughed, the sound unusual enough
in the somber mood that had fallen upon the group for 
several days to cause the people up front to turn 
around. Endymion was one of those who turned and he 
stared at the Princess for a moment before facing 
forward once more. He had never caused her to laugh
so freely like that. He wondered if she had ever felt
truly happy around him. He had probably been the 
cause of more tears than smiles and that thought did 
nothing to lift his spirits.
	"Stay optimistic, Endymion. At least
Serenity is back with us in good health. You can start
anew."
	He looked at Nephrite who had spoken
and smiled slightly. "It's easy to say for you," he 
replied, motioning to the linked hands of the General
and Makoto between their horses.
	"No, I say it because I believe it. I 
wouldn't give up so easily if I were you."
	"Well, you're not me," Endymion
answered hotly, "and I will respect Serenity's wishes,
whatever they may be." He urged his horse forward 
and rode up to one of the soldiers leading the group.
He spoke to him briefly before riding back to the
main group.
	"We must increase our pace," he said 
loudly. "Bruno informs me that the Palace is not too 
far now. If we want to reach there before nightfall,
we must ride faster." Everyone nodded and soon 
they were riding harder and faster, each excited at
the prospect of not having to sleep on the hard 
ground after today.
	As the moon began to rise up into the
sky, the turrets of the Palace could be seen and a 
cheer rose from the group upon seeing the towers.
But as they neared the Palace, the mood changed. 
For the men, it would be coming home to stay for 
what they hoped would be a long while. For the 
women, it was their last stop here on Earth before
they left for the Moon. It was a sobering thought.
	The King and Queen were there to 
greet them at the main entrance, happy smiles on
their faces. "It is so good to see you looking so 
well, Serenity," the Queen said, coming forward to
embrace the Princess. "Just look at your hair! You
really are a perfect copy of your Mother now. We
have been frantic with worry ever since that 
horrible day. It was so bad that Endymion had 
withdrawn into himself, refusing-"
	Endymion neatly interrupted his mother
before she could say anything more. "Mother,
Father. How have things been since we left?"
	"Quiet," the older man replied. "There 
has been no news on Beryl and her forces. We
can only hope that she has given up for good."
	Endymion didn't think so but didn't 
speak his thoughts out loud for the moment. Now
was not the time to discuss such things, he thought,
looking over at Serenity who was now being led 
away by the Queen, the Senshi following. Now
was the time to discuss another matter… with
Serenity only.
*~*

	Endymion never got a chance alone
with Serenity for the rest of the night or the next 
day. At dinner, she had announced that she and
the Senshi would be leaving in three days time. 
He had sat back in astonishment, realizing that 
three days would go by very quickly. By looking
at the Senshi's faces, he could tell that the 
declaration had taken them aback as well. He 
knew something was amiss but wasn't able to
talk to Serenity until the following night.
	It was late, most of the Palace having 
already gone off to sleep. But he knew that the 
Princess was awake. How he knew, he didn't
question. He couldn't look into that right now as 
he stood in front of the doors leading to her
reom. Knocking firmly on the wood, he waited 
for her permission to enter.
	"Come in!"
	He was surprised that she would so
readily allow him to enter. Stepping inside, he
shut the door quietly and then froze upon seeing
Serenity. She was sitting off to the side in front 
of the vanity, her pale silver hair open and all
around her. It shined and looked alive almost as 
she ran a brush through one long strand of it.
	She turned around with a smile on her
face as she spoke, "Minako, it's about time-" Her 
smile instantly fell away when she saw that the
person who had entered the room was not the 
golden-haired Senshi. Rather, it was the dark-
haired Prince who now stood in front of her, 
looking ever so handsome.
	"Endymion," she said softly, getting up.
He sucked in his breath when he saw what she
was wearing. A long slim nightgown that bared her
smooth shoulders encased her body and accentuated 
her curves when she took a few steps toward him. 
"What can I do for you?" 
	He cringed inwardly when he heard the
ice in her voice. There was a long, rocky road in 
front of him and he wasn't even sure if it was the
right one. Why was he even here tonight? Hadn't he
told Nephrite that he would respect Serenity's 
wishes?
	Aaah, a little voice chided, but you don't 
really know what Serenity's wishes are, do you? She
hadn't specifically asked him to leave her. What she
had said to him before her disappearance just 
couldn't count. He had been a blind fool at that time.
He had changed since then… and he hoped she had
too.
	"I came to talk to you, Princess. You 
must have known that we cannot avoid the topic any
longer." He walked up to her and was relieved that
she didn't move away from him. Instead, she crossed 
her arms across her chest defensively.
	"I didn't even know we had something to 
discuss," she replied. Tucking a long strand of her hair
behind her ear, she turned so that her back was to him 
and then looked at him from a sideways glance. "I 
believe we've said all we've had to say. There is nothing
more to be done." Saying that she began to walk away 
from him.
	However, Endymion was far from being
dismissed so easily. Before she could take two steps,
he had quickly grabbed her arm. But she didn't turn 
around, only waited for him to say something. And he
did. "You can't have me believe that, Serenity. I simply
refuse to think that what's been done is done."
	At his words, she did spin around, her eyes
narrowed. "And what would you have me do? Forget
all that has happened? You know I can't." She pulled
her arm away from his grasp and took a step back, 
throwing her arms out. "I don't know what happened
to me. I have all these memories but I feel numb. I 
can't feel anything. I just see. It's so frustrating because
when you remember something, you remember 
everything. The sights, the smells, the sounds, 
everything! Down to how fast your heart was
beating at that moment. But my memories are just
what they are, and nothing more." She looked at
him with eyes that implored him to understand. 
	"But do you know what's odd?" she 
continued. "What I've just described, the memories…
they're from my time spent at that Circus. However,
everything before that…" she put her hands to her
heart, "I feel. I can feel the way my heart sped up
the first time I saw you in that tent at the campsite.
I can feel my happiness when you awoke because
I healed you. I can feel the hope that surged through
my heart as I thought, just maybe there could be 
something shared between us. And then I feel the 
pain." Her hands fell to her sides and she looked off 
to some point behind him as the tone of her voice
became flat. "I feel the pain of disappointment, the
pain of unhappiness and most of all the pain of your
rejection."
	Her eyes shifted to his and he felt like 
dying as he saw the deep wells of suffering the blue
orbs had become. All this time that Serenity had
been gone, he had been alone with his thoughts. He 
had thought the guilt he felt from them would surely 
crush him but nothing could compare to having 
Serenity, his love, put all his thoughts to words. He
hadn't thought there could be anymore weight upon
his heart but as he had listened to her words, he 
had wanted to fall on his knees and weep for all 
that he had caused. 
	But nothing could be solved from that. 
He had no choice but to move forward and he did 
so, figuratively and literally as he stepped up to her
so close that there was hardly any space between 
them. His hand lifted to slowly, cautiously place 
itself at her waist. His other hand rose so that he 
could slide the back of it against one side of her 
face. She flinched but did not move. 
	"I know…" he began hoarsely, "I know
that nothing I say or do can make up for what has
happened to you. It's all my fault and if I could take
it back-"
	She placed her hand on top of his and 
interrupted him. "No, it wasn't your fault. Her gaze
drifted downwards. "No one can be blamed for
my kidnapping except for those who took me. It
would have happened anyway, at any time. I was
in the wrong place, at the wrong time. It was Fate,
not you."
	Endymion stared at her, feeling
somewhat awed and humbled. "Serenity…  I don't
know what to say…" his gaze drifted across her
face and when she said nothing more, his eyes fell
shut and he bent his head to capture her lips with
his own. She responded almost immediately, her 
mouth opening under his, and her arms going 
around to his back. His own arms encircled her 
body and pulled her close as he continued to kiss
her, tilting his head to deepen the kiss. It had been
so long and he took everything she had to offer in that
kiss and then gave back the same amount. Fire was
licking across his veins and he surrendered to it. He
surrendered to her.
	The deepening kisses soon became hungry
and it was then that the fire erupted within them. They 
were two people who not only wanted but *needed* 
each other. The hand that was at Serenity's waist had 
traveled to her lower back and Endymion's other hand
now cupped the back of her neck, his fingers lightly 
rubbing the soft skin. 
	Although all his thoughts had scattered 
at the feel of her soft lips, through the hazy mist of it all, 
Endymion realized there was one thing he had to get out.
One thing he had to say and what she had to hear. As their
kisses became lighter, he tried to whisper the words that 
came from deep within him. "Serenity, I lov-"
	But it was then that she tore her mouth
away from his abruptly and looked at him with eyes
full of tears. "No. No, Endymion, don't say it." Her
arms dropped to her sides even though he 
continued to hold her. "I'm not the naïve fool I once
was. I don't want…" she trailed off, unable to say
anything else. He noticed that her cheeks were flushed
a rosy red and she was breathing heavily. She had
been affected by their kisses as much as he had, but 
just as quickly, she was now acting as though nothing
had happened!  
	He stood stunned with wide eyes. But 
then his eyes narrowed. "What don't you want?"
	"You!" she burst out. Wiping away the 
tears that threatened to fall, she sniffed and took a
step back, away from his embrace. "Please go. 
There isn't anything between us so just leave."
	He looked at her incredulously before 
answering sarcastically. "Your actions of just a few 
moments ago belie what you say." He stopped and 
then softened his tone. "Serenity, I'm sorry for what
I said so long ago. I was spewing complete
nonsense on that day. My thoughts were completely
jumbled after hearing your admission of love-"
	Her bitter laugh stopped him. "My 
admission of love? Is that what you call it? I was a 
fool, Endymion. A complete and utter fool for even 
thinking you could even have the same feelings as I, 
a complete stranger in your life."
	"That's not true!" he argued. "I was the
foolish one!"
	"No, I…" she stopped and then 
frowned. "We will not argue who was the fool that
day. That will get us nowhere."
	"Exactly.  So why can we not put the
past behind us and move on towards a better future?"
Endymion asked, frustrated. He was not expecting a
moment of silence as an answer. 
	"You don't understand, do you?" Serenity 
finally whispered. "You broke my heart, Endymion. It's
not something easily mended. I can't just come back 
into your arms and pretend that you never pushed me 
away that time I told you everything in my soul. No, I 
have learned a lot since then and I will not make the
same mistake twice." Her eyes hardened and the 
flatness was back in her voice as she said two words. 
"Now leave."
	She turned around and walked away
from him to the other side of the room, near the 
windows. Pointedly ignoring him, Endymion knew 
she was waiting for him to leave. But he couldn't let 
her go so quickly. Not without a fight.
	"So you would throw away everything 
we've been through, just like that?" he asked, 
crossing his arms. "From the time that you first saw 
me, to the time that you met me, to the time that 
you lost me," he saw her stiffen but went on, " to 
the time that I lost you, to the time up till now. We 
have been pulled apart only to be given a chance 
to come back together again. We are linked, you
and I. What you feel, I feel. Can you deny that we
are destined?"
	The question hung in the air and
Endymion waited. Feeling something akin to relief, 
he heard a sob break the tense atmosphere, 
followed by another. Would she accept him now? 
Slowly, she turned around, the tears trailing down
her face. She didn't bother to wipe them away and 
bit her bottom lip before speaking.
	"Would that I never see you again Prince
Endymion."
	An iron band wrapped around his heart
and squeezed tight. His lungs constricted, stopping 
airflow. He heard the blood rush in his ears, but all 
the while, on the outside, he remained composed. 
Finally, he closed his eyes and took a deep breath
before opening them again.
	"If that is what you wish." He was being 
ripped apart even as he said the words. 
	"It is what I wish above all things."

*^*End*^*
Th-th-th-that's all folks!

Readers: O.O .... >-<

Oh! That's all for the chapter, hehe. I wouldn't
end the story and leave you guys hanging *there* 
of all places. I'm evil but not cruel... o.O;;
Yeah, okies. Hope you all liked!
Patch:-)(-: