There aren't any regular meetings of the TSTSC, but for some reason, they tend to occur the night before school starts (because we're usually not expected to actually think on the first day of school anyway).

The founding members of the Too Stupid To Sleep Club are:

interesting facts
about being too
stupid to sleep

The Chair of Sleep--This is a padded, red, rocking floor-chair that used to be in our lobby. Whoever sat in it inevitably falls asleep, without fail. It's a key part of the TSTSC experience.

Truth or Dare--This is a side effect of being Too Stupid to Sleep. One second you're just feeling a little drowsy, and a few hours of too-stupid-to-sleepness later, you're telling dark secrets to people whose faces you can't remember afterwards. Ah, it's bliss.

Barefoot Snow Running--Another side effect. For advanced too-stupids only, this event can cause an interesting set of tracks for people to gawk at the next morning. For even more excitement, do this while running with a stolen cooking pot in your hands. Or on your head. It makes life fun.

Lobby Sleep--Sleeping in the lobby of an apartment building is a great way to close an edition of the TSTSC, especially when coupled with a good game of Truth or Dare. WARNING: This may tick off the custodial staff of said building. You've been warned.

Reading Parts of Leviticus With A Monty Python Accent--Probably something that can only be done successfully as part of the TSTSC. I don't think there's much else to say about this without causing further embarassment.

Excessive Consumption of Liquids--Staying up late can make you thirsty. Why not try to drink an entire gallon of milk to cool off? Or orange juice, if you are of the vegetarian kind? WARNING: Don't say we didn't warn you.

Taco Bell Runs--There's nothing more adventurous than going to Taco Bell at 3 a. m. Will you actually recieve what you ordered? Or will you get something completely different? Only members of the TSTSC know for sure.

Scum--This is a good card game to play when you're tired but still have some energy. It's based on a feudal class-system, and is really great to over-analyze. ("I, the quasi-educated middle class, formally revolt against YOU, evil Queen! Ha ha ha!")

Mafia--Same idea as above, only with a cops-and-robbers theme. This game is greatest when people are so tired that they mess up. (This could be alternately titled "Gadianton Robbers," but it's hard to use so many syllables when you're tired.)

Grotesque Changes of Appearance--This is the nicest way of putting it, really. It happens like this: You're tired, you see a bottle of nail polish, and a box of hair dye. Your mind goes blank, and you wake up looking like Cher. This is particularly embarrassing if you're male, although most guys I know seem to enjoy having their nails painted by a bunch of women.

Odd Food--Have some sort of strange, unusual food? The TSTSC will usually eat anything, so it's good to try out odd food on them. Break out the weird Japanese box-cake, the orange Middle-Eastern chip-dip, those "Milky" candies! Your stomach can't feel pain when you're tired! (I would like to add that all the foods mentioned here were extremely tasty, or at least I thought they were tasty when I ate them.)

Mouth-to-Mouth Chewed Food Trading--This only happened once, so I'm not even going to go into it.

Wrestling--Yes! Have a friendly fight over anything--an empty soda bottle, a chair, candy, plungers...you can even use the object you're fighting over as a weapon. It's also a rather unconventional way to flirt with members of the opposite sex. Ahem. WARNING: Don't throw the plunger out the window; it's just too weird.

The Zen of Zuka--Some people profess to gain a miraculous ability to make a Zuka Juice fruit smoothie last for three hours when they are in the presence of the TSTSC. It's rather mysterious, and very enlightening. Or something.

Public Displays of Affection--Oh, you bet.

Dryer Fresh Scent--It's late at night. What do a lot of people do late at night? Laundry! And what smell do the dryers make when they're running? Dryer Fresh smell! And where does this heavenly scent go? It drifts upwards, towards you! When you're part of the TSTSC, it's always plesant to find this smell floating through your nostrils. Just crank open the window a bit, and....ahhhhhhh.

Winter Walks--Lots of fun when it's past midnight. Just be careful you don't cut yourself on the crust of the snow. Ick.

Organized Violence: Chicken Fights and the Gauntlet--Chicken fights are pretty common, but the skill seen in creating a pillow gauntlet (complete with a ninja and matresses at the end) is a rare sight. For the vicarious too-stupids only.

Monk-ish Groaning--You know, "Ommmmmm..." just like monks. It's great to throw this into a round of "Old MacDonald Had a Farm," too. Just to make things more intellectual.

Human Pyramids--Just make sure nobody gets hurt, okay? Oh,and make sure there's a cameraman, so you'll have proof that it happened.

Hide-and-go-Seek--Same as above. Er, without the camera, that is.

Setting Things on Fire--DO THIS OUTDOORS--Did you know that non-dairy creamer is extremely flammable? Did you know that there's only one way of finding this out? Oh, yes.

Mistletoe--Hee hee hee hee hee. (See "Public Displays of Affection," above.)

They Might Be Giants--Sometimes, this is the only music that sounds good when you're Too Stupid To Sleep. Corollary: Moxy Fruvous (well, for some people, anyway).

Staring at People Getting Ready to Go Out Dancing--Just because you're in the TSTSC doesn't mean you're not a loser. Kidding! Kidding!

Breaking and Entering--Well, not really. But we've thought about it.

Evil Pinatas--Some pinatas don't have candy in them! Know what? --Those are EVIL pinatas, and they must be punished. Preferably by filling them with fireworks, taking them out into an empty lot, and.... (See "Setting Things on Fire," above.)

Sagittariuses Claiming That The World Revolves Around Them--A rather plesant side effect, actually.

Singing Each Other Goodnight--So...you've had a raucous meeting of the TSTSC. What do you do to end it? Well, you give out hugs, say "good-night" over and over again, and then sing sweet songs out across the room. The melody drifts away, becomes silvery and ephemeral.....the TSTSC has adjourned.