A new twist on computer owners....
  
  Costello: Hey, Abbot!
  
  Abbot: Yes, Lou?
  
  Costello: I just got my first computer.
   
  Abbot: That's great Lou. What did you get?
  
  Costello: A Pentium II-266, with 40 Megs of RAM, a 2.1 Gig hard drive,
  and a 24X CD-ROM.
  
  Abbot: That's terrific, Lou.
  
  Costello: But I don't know what any of it means!! 
  
  Abbot: You will in time.
  
  Costello: That's exactly why I am here to see you.
  
  Abbot: Oh?
  
  Costello: I heard that you are a real computer expert. 
  
  Abbot: Well, I don't know-
  
  Costello: Yes-sir-ee. You know your stuff. And you're going to train me.
  
  Abbot: Really?
  
  Costello: Uh huh. And I am here for my first lesson.
  
  Abbot: O.K. Lou. What do you want to know?
   
  Costello: I am having no problem turning it on, but I heard that you
  should be very careful how you turn it off.
  
  Abbot: That's true.
  
  Costello: So, here I am working on my new computer and I want 
  to turn it off. What do I do?
  
  Abbot: Well, first you press the Start button, and then- 
  
  Costello: No, I told you, I want to turn it off. 
  
  Abbot: I know, you press the Start button- 
  
  Costello: Wait a second. I want to turn it off. Off. I know how to start
  it.  So tell me what to do.
  
  Abbot: I did.
  
  Costello: When?
  
  Abbot: When I told you to press the Start button.
   
  Costello: Why should I press the Start button?
  
  Abbot: To shut off the computer.
  
  Costello: I press Start to stop.
  
  Abbot: Well Start doesn't actually stop the computer. 
  
  Costello: I knew it! So what do I press.
  
  Abbot: Start.
  
  Costello: Start what?
  
  Abbot: Start button.
  
  Costello: Start button to do what?
  
  Abbot: Shut down.
  
  Costello: You don't have to get rude!
  
  Abbot: No, no, no! That's not what I meant.
   
  Costello: Then say what you mean.
  
  Abbot: To shut down the computer, press-
   
  Costello: Don't say, "Start!"
  
  Abbot: Then what do you want me to say?
   
  Costello: Look, if I want to turn off the computer, I am willing to
  press the Stop button, the End button and Cease and Desist button, but
  no one in their right mind presses the Start to Stop.
   
  Abbot: But that's what you do.
  
  Costello: And you probably Go at Stop signs, and Stop at green lights.
  
  Abbot: Don't be ridiculous.
  
  Costello: I am being ridiculous? Well. I think it's about time we
  started this conversation.
  
  Abbot: What are you talking about?
  
  Costello: I am starting this conversation right now. Good-bye.