From February 7, 1868, to May 20, 1868
After we had reached our home, and ceased
to feel the inspiring influence of journeying and laboring, we
felt most sensibly the wearing labors of our eastern tour. Many
were urging me by letters to write what I had related to them
of what the Lord had shown me concerning them. And there were
many others to whom I had not spoken whose cases were as important
and urgent. But in my weary condition the task of so much writing
seemed more than I could endure. A feeling of discouragement
came over me, and I sank into a feeble state and remained so
several days, frequently fainting. In this state of body and
mind I called in question my duty to write so much, to so many
persons, some of them very unworthy. It seemed to me that there
was certainly a mistake in this matter somewhere.
On the evening of February 5 Brother Andrews
spoke to the people in our house of worship. But most of that
evening I was in a fainting, breathless condition, supported
by my husband. When Brother Andrews returned from the meeting,
they had a special season of prayer for me, and I found some
relief. That night I slept well, and in the morning, though feeble,
felt wonderfully relieved and encouraged. I had dreamed that
a person brought to me a web of white cloth, and bade me cut
it into garments for persons of all sizes and all descriptions
of character and circumstances in life. I was told to cut them
out and hang them up all ready to be made when called for. I
had the impression that many for whom I was required to cut garments
were unworthy. I inquired if that was the last piece of cloth
I should have to cut, and was told that it was not; that as soon
as I had finished this one, there were
others for me to take hold of. I felt discouraged at the amount
of work before me, and stated that I had been engaged in cutting
garments for others for more than twenty years, and my labors
had not been appreciated, neither did I see that my work had
accomplished much good. I spoke to the person who brought the
cloth to me, of one woman in particular, for whom he had told
me to cut a garment. I stated that she would not prize the garment,
and that it would be a loss of time and material to present it
to her. She was very poor, of inferior intellect, and untidy
in her habits, and would soon soil it.
The person replied: "Cut out the garments.
That is your duty. The loss is not yours, but mine. God sees
not as man sees. He lays out the work that He would have done,
and you do not know which will prosper, this or that. It will
be found that many such poor souls will go into the kingdom,
while others, who are favored with all the blessings of life,
having good intellects and pleasant surroundings, giving them
all the advantages of improvement, will be left out. It will
be seen that these poor souls have lived up to the feeble light
which they had, and have improved by the limited means within
their reach, and lived much more acceptably than some others
who have enjoyed full light and ample means for improvement."
I then held up my hands, calloused as they
were with long use of the shears, and stated that I could but
shrink at the thought of pursuing this kind of labor. The person
again repeated:
"Cut out the garments. Your release
has not yet come."
With feelings of great weariness I arose
to engage in the work. Before me lay new, polished shears, which
I commenced using. At once my feelings of weariness and discouragement
left me; the shears seemed to cut with hardly an effort on my
part, and I cut out garment after garment
with comparative ease.
With the encouragement which this dream
gave me, I at once decided to accompany my husband and Brother
Andrews to Gratiot, Saginaw, and Tuscola Counties, and trust
in the Lord to give me strength to labor. So, on the 7th of February,
we left home, and rode fifty-five miles to our appointment at
Alma. Here I labored as usual, with a comfortable degree of freedom
and strength. The friends in Gratiot County seemed interested
to hear, but many of them are far behind on the health reform
and in the work of preparation generally. There seemed to be
among this people a want of the order and efficiency necessary
to prosperity in the work and spirit of the message. Brother
Andrews, however, visited them three weeks later and enjoyed
a good season with them. I will not pass over a matter of encouragement
to me, that a very pointed testimony which I had written to one
family was received with profit to the persons addressed. We
still feel a deep interest in that family and ardently desire
that they may enjoy prosperity in the Lord, and although we feel
some discouragement as to the cause in Gratiot County we shall
be anxious to help the brethren when they feel anxious to be
helped.
At the Alma meeting there were brethren
present from St. Charles and Tittabawassee, Saginaw County, who
urged us to visit them. We had not designed to enter this county
at present, but to visit Tuscola County if the way opened. Not
hearing from Tuscola, we decided to visit Tittabawassee, and
meantime write to Tuscola County and inquire if we were wanted
there. At Tittabawassee we were happily disappointed to find
a large house of worship, recently built by our people, well
filled with Sabbathkeepers. The brethren seemed ready for our
testimony, and we enjoyed freedom. A great and good work had
been done in this place through the faithful labors
of Brother A. Much bitter opposition and persecution
had followed, but this seemed to melt away with those who came
to hear, and our labors seemed to make a good impression upon
all. I attended eleven meetings in this place in one week, spoke
several times from one to two hours, and took part in the other
meetings. At one meeting an effort was made to induce certain
ones who observe the Sabbath to move forward and take up the
cross. The duty before most of these was baptism. In my last
vision I saw places where the truth would be preached and bring
out churches which we should visit. This was one of those places.
I felt a peculiar interest for this people. The cases of certain
ones in the congregation opened before me, and a spirit of labor
for them came upon me which I could not throw off. For about
three hours I labored for them, most of the time appealing to
them with feelings of the deepest solicitude. All took the cross
on that occasion and came forward for prayers, and nearly all
spoke. The next day fifteen were baptized.
No one can visit this people without being
impressed with the value of Brother A's faithful labors in this
cause. His work is to enter places where the truth has not been
proclaimed, and I hope our people will cease their efforts to
draw him from his specific work. In the spirit of humility he
can go forth, leaning upon the arm of the Lord, and rescue many
souls from the powers of darkness. May the blessing of God still
be with him.
As our series of meetings in this place
was near its close, Brother Spooner of Tuscola came for us to
visit that county. We sent appointments by him as he returned
on Monday, and we followed on Thursday after the baptism. At
Vassar we held our meetings Sabbath and first day at the union
schoolhouse. This was a free place in which to speak, and we
saw good fruit of our labors. First-day afternoon about thirty
backsliders, and children who had made no profession, came
forward. This was a very interesting and profitable
meeting. Some were drawing back from the cause, for whom we especially
felt to labor. But the time was short, and it seemed to me that
we should leave the work unfinished. But our appointments were
out for St. Charles and Alma, and to meet them we must close
our labors in Vassar on Monday.
That night what I had seen in vision concerning
certain persons in Tuscola County was revived in a dream, and
I was still more impressed that my work for that people was not
done. Yet I saw no other way only to go on to our appointments.
Tuesday we journeyed thirty-two miles to St. Charles and stopped
for the night with Brother Griggs. Here I wrote fifteen pages
of testimony, and attended meeting in the evening. Wednesday
morning we decided to return to Tuscola if Brother Andrews would
fill the appointment at Alma. To this he agreed. That morning
I wrote fifteen pages more, attended a meeting and spoke one
hour, and we rode thirty-three miles with Brother and Sister
Griggs to Brother Spooner's in Tuscola. Thursday morning we went
to Watrousville, a distance of sixteen miles. I wrote sixteen
pages, and attended an evening meeting, in which I gave a very
pointed testimony to one present. The next morning I wrote twelve
pages before breakfast, and returned to Tuscola, and wrote eight
pages more.
Sabbath my husband spoke in the forenoon,
and I followed for two hours before taking food. The meeting
was then closed for a few moments, and I took a little food,
and afterward spoke in a social meeting for one hour, bearing
pointed testimonies for several present. These testimonies were
generally received with feelings of humility and gratitude. I
cannot, however, say that all were so received.
The next morning, as we were about to leave
for the house of worship to engage in the arduous labors of the
day, a sister for whom I had a testimony that she lacked discretion
and caution, and did not fully
control her words and actions, came in with her husband and manifested
feelings of great unreconciliation and agitation. She commenced
to talk and to weep. She murmured a little, and confessed a little,
and justified self considerably. She had a wrong idea of many
things I had stated to her. Her pride was touched as I brought
out her faults in so public a manner. Here was evidently the
main difficulty. But why should she feel thus? The brethren and
sisters knew these things were so, therefore I was not informing
them of anything new. But I doubt not that it was new to the
sister herself. She did not know herself, and could not properly
judge of her own words and acts. This is in a degree true of
nearly all, hence the necessity of faithful reproofs in the church
and the cultivation by all its members of love for the plain
testimony.
Her husband seemed to feel unreconciled
to my bringing out her faults before the church and stated that
if Sister White had followed the directions of our Lord in Matthew
18:15-17 he should not have felt hurt: "Moreover if thy
brother shall trespass against thee, go and tell him his fault
between thee and him alone: if he shall hear thee, thou hast
gained thy brother. But if he will not hear thee, then take with
thee one or two more, that in the mouth of two or three witnesses
every word may be established. And if he shall neglect to hear
them, tell it unto the church: but if he neglect to hear the
church, let him be unto thee as an heathen man and a publican."
My husband then stated that he should understand
that these words of our Lord had reference to cases of personal
trespass, and could not be applied in the case of this sister.
She had not trespassed against Sister White. But that which had
been reproved publicly was public wrongs which threatened the
prosperity of the church and the cause. Here, said my husband,
is a text applicable to the case: 1 Timothy 5:20: "Them
that sin rebuke before all, that others also may fear."
The brother acknowledged his error like
a Christian and seemed reconciled to the matter. It was evident
that since the meeting of Sabbath afternoon they had got many
things about the matter wonderfully magnified and wrong. It was
therefore proposed that the written testimony be read. When this
was done, the sister who was reproved by it, inquired: "Is
that what you stated yesterday?" I replied that it was.
She seemed surprised and quite reconciled to the written testimony.
This I gave her, without reserving a copy. Here I did wrong.
But I had such tender regard for her and her husband, and such
ardent desires and hopes for their prosperity, that, in this
case, I broke over an established custom.
Already meeting time was passing, and we
hastened one mile and a half to the waiting congregation. The
reader may judge whether the scene of that morning was well adapted
to aid us in the collection of thought and nerve necessary to
stand before the people. But who thinks of this? Some may, and
show a little mercy, while the impulsive and careless will come
with their burdens and trials, generally just before we are to
speak, or when perfectly exhausted by speaking. My husband, however,
summoned all his energies, and by request spoke with freedom
on the law and the gospel. I had received an invitation to speak
in the afternoon in the new house of worship recently built and
dedicated by the Methodists. This commodious building was crowded,
and many were obliged to stand. I spoke with freedom for about
an hour and a half upon the first of the two great commandments
repeated by our Lord, and was surprised to learn that it was
the same from which the Methodist minister had spoken in the
forenoon. He and his people were present to hear what I had to
say.
In the evening we had a precious interview
at Brother Spooner's with Brethren Miller, Hatch, and Haskell,
and Sisters Sturges, Bliss, Harrison, and Malin. We now felt
that our work for the present was done in
Tuscola County. We became very much interested in this dear people,
yet feared that the sister referred to, for whom I had a testimony,
would let Satan take advantage of her and cause them trouble.
I felt an earnest desire that she might view the matter in its
true light. The course she had been pursuing was destroying her
influence in the church and outside of it. But now, if she would
receive the needed reproof, and humbly seek to improve by it,
the church would take her anew into their hearts, and the people
would think more of her Christianity. And what is better still,
she could enjoy the approving smiles of her dear Redeemer. Would
she fully receive the testimony? was my anxious inquiry. I feared
that she would not and that the hearts of the brethren in that
county would be saddened on her account.
After returning home, I sent to her for
a copy of the testimony, and on the 15th of April received the
following, dated at Denmark, April 11, 1868: "Sister White:
Yours of the 23d ult. is at hand. Am sorry I cannot comply with
your request."
I shall still cherish the tenderest feelings
of regard for this family, and shall be happy to help them when
I can. It is true that such treatment from those for whom I give
my life casts a shade of sadness over me; but my course has been
so plainly marked out for me that I cannot let such things keep
me from the path of duty. As I returned from the post office
with the above note, feeling rather depressed in spirit, I took
the Bible, and opened it with the prayer that I might find comfort
and support therein, and my eye rested directly upon the following
words of the prophet: "Thou therefore gird up thy loins,
and arise, and speak unto them all that I command thee: be not
dismayed at their faces, lest I confound thee before them. For,
behold, I have made thee this day a defensed city, and an iron
pillar, and brazen walls against the whole land, against the
kings of Judah, against the princes thereof,
against the priests thereof, and against the people of the land.
And they shall fight against thee; but they shall not prevail
against thee; for I am with thee, saith the Lord, to deliver
thee." Jeremiah 1:17-19.
We returned home from this tour just before
a great fall of rain which carried off the snow. This storm prevented
the next Sabbath meeting, and I immediately commenced to prepare
matter for Testimony No. 14. We also had the privilege of caring
for our dear Brother King, whom we brought to our home with a
terrible injury upon the head and face. We took him to our house
to die, for we could not think it possible for one with the skull
so terribly broken in to recover. But with the blessing of God
upon a very gentle use of water, a very spare diet till the danger
of fever was past, and well-ventilated rooms day and night, in
three weeks he was able to return to his home and attend to his
farming interests. He did not take one grain of medicine from
first to last. Although he was considerably reduced by loss of
blood from his wounds and by spare diet, yet when he could take
a more liberal amount of food he came up rapidly.
About this time we commenced labor for
our brethren and friends near Greenville. As is the case in many
places, our brethren needed help. There were some who kept the
Sabbath, yet did not belong to the church, and also some who
had given up the Sabbath, who needed help. We felt disposed to
help these poor souls, but the past course and present position
of leading members of the church in relation to these persons
made it almost impossible for us to approach them. In laboring
with the erring, some of our brethren had been too rigid, too
cutting in remarks. And when some were disposed to reject their
counsel and separate from them, they would say: "Well, if
they want to go off, let them go." While such a lack of
the compassion, and long-suffering, and tenderness of Jesus
was manifested by His professed followers,
these poor, erring, inexperienced souls, buffeted by Satan, were
certain to make shipwreck of faith. However great may be the
wrongs and sins of the erring, our brethren must learn to manifest
not only the tenderness of the Great Shepherd, but also His undying
care and love for the poor, straying sheep. Our ministers toil
and lecture week after week, and rejoice that a few souls embrace
the truth; and yet brethren of a prompt, decided turn of mind
may, in five minutes, destroy their work by indulging the feelings
which prompt words like these: "Well, if they want to leave
us, let them go."
We found that we could do nothing for the
scattered sheep near us until we had first corrected the wrongs
in many of the members of the church. They had let these poor
souls wander. They felt no burden for them. In fact, they seemed
shut up to themselves, and were dying a spiritual death for want
of spiritual exercise. They still loved the general cause, and
were ready to help sustain it. They would take good care of the
servants of God. But there was a decided want of care for widows,
orphans, and the feeble of the flock. Besides some interest for
the cause in general, there was but little apparent interest
for any only their own families. With so narrow a religion they
were dying a spiritual death.
There were some who kept the Sabbath, attended
meeting, and paid systematic benevolence, yet were out of the
church. And it is true that they were not fit to belong to any
church. But while leading church members stood as some in that
church did, giving them little or no encouragement, it was almost
impossible for them to arise in the strength of God and do better.
As we began to labor with the church, and teach them that they
must have a spirit of labor for the erring, much that I had seen
relative to the cause in that place, opened before me, and I
wrote out pointed testimonies not only for those who had erred
greatly and were out of the church, but for
those members in the church who had erred greatly in not going
in search of the lost sheep. And I was never more disappointed
in the manner in which these testimonies were received. When
those who had been greatly in fault were reproved by most pointed
testimonies, read to them publicly, they received them, and confessed
with tears. But some of those in the church, who claimed to be
the fast friends of the cause and the Testimonies, could hardly
think it possible that they had been as wrong as the testimonies
declared them to be. When told that they were self-caring, shut
up to themselves and families; that they had failed to care for
others, had been exclusive, and had left precious souls to perish;
that they were in danger of being overbearing and self-righteous,
they were brought into a state of great agitation and trial.
But this experience was just what they
needed to teach them forbearance toward others in a similar state
of trial. There are many who feel sure that they will have no
trial respecting the Testimonies, and continue to feel so till
they are tested. They think it strange that any can doubt. They
are severe with those who manifest doubts, and cut and slash,
to show their zeal for the Testimonies, manifesting more self-righteousness
than humility. But when the Lord reproves them for their wrongs,
they find themselves as weak as water. Then they can hardly endure
the trial. These things should teach them humility, self-abasement,
tenderness, and undying love for the erring.
It seems to me that the Lord is giving
the erring, the weak and trembling, and even those who have apostatized
from the truth, a special call to come fully into the fold. But
there are but few in our churches who feel that this is the case.
And there are still fewer who stand where they can help such.
There are more who stand directly in the way of these poor souls.
Very many have an exacting spirit. They require them to come to just such and such terms before they
will reach to them the helping hand. Thus they hold them off
at arms' length. They have not learned that they have a special
duty to go and search for these lost sheep. They must not wait
till these come to them. Read the touching parable of the lost
sheep. Luke 15:1-7: "Then drew near unto Him all the publicans
and sinners for to hear Him. And the Pharisees and scribes murmured,
saying, This Man receiveth sinners, and eateth with them. And
He spake this parable unto them, saying, What man of you, having
an hundred sheep, if he lose one of them, doth not leave the
ninety and nine in the wilderness, and go after that which is
lost, until he find it? And when he hath found it, he layeth
it on his shoulders, rejoicing. And when he cometh home, he calleth
together his friends and neighbors, saying unto them, Rejoice
with me; for I have found my sheep which was lost. I say unto
you, that likewise joy shall be in heaven over one sinner that
repenteth, more than over ninety and nine just persons, which
need no repentance."
The Pharisees murmured because Jesus received
publicans and common sinners, and ate with them. In their self-righteousness
they despised these poor sinners who gladly heard the words of
Jesus. To rebuke this spirit in the scribes and Pharisees, and
leave an impressive lesson for all, the Lord gave the parable
of the lost sheep. Notice in particular the following points:
The ninety and nine sheep are left, and
diligent search is made for the one that is lost. The entire
effort is made for this unfortunate sheep. So should the effort
of the church be directed in behalf of those members who are
straying from the fold of Christ. And have they wandered far
away, do not wait till they return before you try to help them,
but go in search of them.
When the lost sheep was found, it was borne
home with joy, and much rejoicing followed. This illustrates
the blessed, joyful work of laboring for the erring. The church
that engages successfully in this work is a happy church. That
man or that woman whose soul is drawn out in compassion and love
for the erring, and who labors to bring them to the fold of the
Great Shepherd, is engaged in a blessed work. And, oh, what a
soul-enrapturing thought, that when one sinner is thus reclaimed,
there is more joy in heaven than over ninety and nine just persons!
Selfish, exclusive, exacting souls who seem to fear to help those
in error, as though they would become polluted by so doing, do
not taste of the sweets of this missionary work; they do not
feel that blessedness which fills all heaven with rejoicing upon
the rescue of one who has gone astray. They are shut up to their
narrow views and feelings, and are becoming as dry and unfruitful
as the mountains of Gilboa, upon which there was neither dew
nor rain. Let a strong man be shut away from labor, and he becomes
feeble. That church or those persons who shut themselves away
from bearing burdens for others, who shut themselves up to themselves,
will soon suffer spiritual feebleness. It is labor that keeps
the strong man strong. And spiritual labor, toil and burden bearing,
is what will give strength to the church of Christ.
Sabbath and first day, April 18, 19, we
enjoyed a good season with our people at Greenville. Brethren
A and B were with us. My husband baptized eight. The 25th and
26th we were with the church in Wright. This dear people are
ever ready to welcome us. Here my husband baptized eight.
May 2 we met a large congregation at the
house of worship at Monterey. My husband spoke with clearness
and force upon the parable of the lost sheep. The word was greatly
blessed to the people. Some who had strayed were out of the
church, and there was no spirit of labor to
help them. In fact, the stiff, stern, unfeeling position of some
in the church was calculated to prevent their return, should
they be disposed thus to do. The subject touched the hearts of
all, and all manifested a desire to get right. On first day we
spoke three times in Allegan to good congregations. Our appointment
was out to meet with the church at Battle Creek the 9th, but
we felt that our work in Monterey was but just commenced, and
we therefore decided to return to Monterey and labor with that
church another week. The good work moved on, exceeding our expectations.
The house was filled, and we never before witnessed such a work
in Monterey in so short a time. First day, fifty came forward
for prayers. Brethren felt deeply for the lost sheep, and confessed
their coldness and indifference, and took a good stand. Brethren
G. T. Lay and S. Rummery gave good testimonies, and were joyfully
received by their brethren. Fourteen were baptized, one of them
a man near the middle age of life, who had felt opposed to the
truth. The work moved on with solemnity, confessions, and much
weeping, carrying all before it. Thus closed the arduous labors
of the Conference year. And still we felt that the good work
in Monterey was by no means finished. We have made arrangements
to return and spend several weeks in Allegan County.
The Conference just past has been a season of deepest interest. The labors of my husband have been very great during its numerous sessions, and he must have rest. Our labors for the past year are regarded favorably by our people, and there was manifested to us at the Conference, sympathy, tender care, and benevolence. With them we have enjoyed great freedom, and we part, enjoying mutual confidence and love.