My life: Well, we're finally in the home stretch! I can't wait to have this baby! It seems like the last month of this pregnancy has been very hard. I finally got rid of one kind of pain only to have another appear! I think it must have something to do with my chair at work! My god does my back hurt! It's almost like the baby has settled on that nerve back there - and when the baby moves I suddenly am overcome with something that feels remarkably like a labor pain. I've been at work where I've actually gotten down on my hands and knees to arch my back in hopes it would make me feel better. Oh PLEASE let me have this baby soon! All I want to do is hang out in a pool somewhere.

I have also come to the important conclusion that, truly, attitude is everything. Right around when my Dad and Nanna T. came up, I became aware of how uncomfortable I was. That week I even moved my Midwife appointment up a few days to make sure everything was OK. No surprise, they suggested I take it easy and spend more time in bed. No surprise again, it worked. Having Hubby do everything does indeed make me feel better in the short run. However, I seem to survive on adrenaline and false pretenses. It's like, without my supermom façade. . . once I've admitted to myself that I feel overwhelmed and tired and unable to care for the kids and go grocery shopping at the same time. . . now I feel even worse! Now everything is a struggle! I feel like I go through my day from chair to chair, trying to think of ways to always be sitting down. Sigh. Once there was a crack in my attitude, it's all gone to shit.

What is the most funny thing is that I've been so sure of myself, so confident all along that I wouldn't need help after the baby is born -- and here I am needing help before it's born! I suppose this is a lesson in pride. So I'm pretty frustrated and hormonal.

New Baby: Things are progressing very well. I still weigh 191 and my 'size' (on Tuesday Feb. 22) was 39 cm! SO I'm HUGE! Huge, huge, huge. . . which may also be why my back hurts so much. Damn, the baby is moving now, and it's such sharp pains in my back. Argh. Anyway, the fun story is things are actually happening! With both Pumpkin and Precious, I never had any signs that I was going to go into labor anytime soon. With Precious, I was actually at the OBGYN the night before, who basically said - you've gained a pound, nothing else, go home. However, I'm quite delighted to say that I am already 70% effaced and 1 cm dilated. See, the cervix has to be 100% effaced, and then at 10 cm dilated you actually have the baby! So it appears at least a few of these dumb contractions are doing work! It's not that big a deal really, but it makes me excited (and my dad worried. . . "Oh! Does this mean you're having the baby tonight!?" He is so fabulous!) The very first stage of labor, called the latent stage, is having the cervix efface (or thin out) to 100 percent and dilate 2 cm. Wouldn't it be fun if I did that before labor even started?

I've discovered that the baby really doesn't like chocolate. So any time I want the baby to move around, I have some chocolate and a soda. Hmmm, I wonder if this isn't my child! :+)

Midwife Stuff: Don't have much new midwife stuff to say. I do want to comment again how much I totally love the care. It's just a lot of fun and so much more intense. You really feel like you matter as a person. I did have a heart attack at my last appointment (This one was with Kate, there are four midwives in the practice; Marsha, Alice, Kate and Cindy.) Anyway, they always play quite a bit with the uterus to feel for the back and where the legs are and such. The big key is where the heck the head is, (god forbid I have a breach birth!) and for some reason it's always hard to find. So, after playing around quite a bit, and probably annoying this child to no end, she pulled out the doppler to hear the heartbeat. My heavens - the heartbeat was best heard way up high in my chest! A brief moment of panic! While mom was here the baby had a few very active phases, and I remember thinking to myself, if this silly baby is turning itself around to be a butt presentation I am just going to scream. However, Kate was again able to feel the baby's head internally when she checked for dilation, and we again confirmed that this child is indeed head down, but about as high in my uterus as possible. No where near the ole exit sign! (Come on buddy, it's beautiful out here! And you'll have a lot more room!) At the check up before this one I actually had a contraction while I was on the table! You can see my stomach tighten up. These 'contractions' tend not to hurt much - more of a tightening.

Pumpkin's life: For the last two weeks Pumpkin has been darling! I think that it helps that it's been beautiful out. So I'm able to take the kids outside when they start to annoy each other. I use this phrase from hockey: 'chippy.' They get chippy with each other. A more adult term would be bitchy, I suppose. They both take OK naps, and have lunch, and it's always around 3pm that they don't know what to do with themselves, so they pick on each other. Mom to the rescue -- outside we go! For whatever reason, they are able to play in the sandbox together. I'm not sure why this would be the case, since there is only one red bucket and such (plenty of other colored buckets, but you know how kids are) but they don't fight over stuff like that outside. Yippee. And Amanda has been over a few evenings, and she and Pumpkin play Tiger and hunter and basically chase each other all over the yard. Precious has a vague idea of what is going on, and loves to fall down with Pumpkin.

Pumpkin now rides a two wheeler with training wheels. This has been wonderful. The only difficulty he has so far is crossing the street and then riding up our driveway - a slant of about 3 inches. I have no doubt he could do it, but this is a nice way of making sure Hubby or I stay involved with him while pulling Precious about.

Pumpkin now swims unassisted with a noodle!! This is SOO cool. The pool is a wonderful place to be. The kids both just love water. We'll go from the bathtub, to the pool, into a shower to nap time. This is how I survive Fridays. So you give him a noodle and off to the races! He wants to keep his head way above water, which causes his back end to sink - so it often looks like he's riding a stationary bike underwater.

Just the other day I found my Riverdance video - actually I think the babysitter found it. This is a tape of a dance show - basically Irish dancing and tap dancing. Fabulous stuff. Anyway, Pumpkin really seems to enjoy the dancing. He bounces up and down and we talk about how fast the people's feet are moving! I want to see dancing, he says.

Precious's life: Precious continues to explore the depths of being a terrible toddler. On Wed. the 23 she had her first lay-on-the-floor-screaming fit. We were heading out the door to day care - it had been a good morning and I was not anticipating any problems. I had already let Hubby walk out the door and drive away. She suddenly decided her own tiger was not enough and she wanted Pumpkin's Tigger as well. (Tigger is different from tiger) This was not possible, so she stood there screaming for awhile and then plopped on the floor for a full out fit. Sigh. You know, the T-2s aren't so bad with the second one. With Pumpkin things like that made me so frustrated, but now I'm more like "Precious honey, I'm so sorry it is hard to be two!" Generally she's a darling child, but she does like to have things her way an awful lot. And she's absolutely loony about that stuffed tiger. Tigers in general, really, as she also periodically carries about a plastic one as well. This give Pumpkin plenty of ammo when he wants to annoy her.

Have I told you about 'tiger go nite nite' yet? Precious is SO adorable. Anyway, she constantly plops her tiger down, and then grabs a washcloth and covers it with a washcloth. It took me the longest while to figure out what she was doing -- putting the tiger to bed. Recently she has been saying 'go nite nite' when she covers the tiger. She is so sweet.

Precious also says 'Here' quite a bit as she hands things to you. She can baa like a sheep and neigh like a horse (which always ends up in a giggle) She understands many more words then she can say - but she attempts to repeat about everything. Yellow, worm, cow, tiger, pooh-bear, totally random stuff. She also crawls around on the floor and barks like a dog! (Imitating her brother, no doubt!)

Finally, we are going to have to buy her a booster seat. She now really wants to eat dinner at the table with us, not in the high chair. So she fusses and yells and we eventually put her on the floor. Well, she's still hungry and immediately tries to push Pumpkin off his chair to eat his food. (Why she does not choose one of the empty chairs at the table is a mystery) Also, because she is not a large kid, she has to stand to reach the food - and I'm waiting for her to tip the chair over and put her lower teeth through her upper lip.

What has happened since last we talked: One of our neighbors (clear out of the blue) gave us another crib! How wonderful is that? The funny thing, this is the neighbor that Aunt JoAnn doesn't particularly like. This woman, when she very first met me, thought I was like a 16 year old unwed pregnant teen. So she approached me in the front yard and said something to the effect of, "Nice to meet you, I can't wait to meet your parents." And I'm like, "My parents? They live out of state, my HUSBAND and I bought this house." Anyway, she's always been nice enough, but the only time we really talk is after I have a baby she comes over with a gift and checks out the house. Well, the house is never all that clean to start with, so you can imagine how quickly it deteriorates with a new baby. SO this drives JoAnn bonkers - calls her, 'that woman with the wandering eyes!' (Ha ha, which is SO true) Anyway, believe it or not, the other day she comes on over (comes in the house to check things out, no less!) (And the house was clean! Because Maria had just come!!) And says that her youngest grandchild no longer needed the crib, and it seemed like we probably good. Oh God yes! So, totally free of charge we got this crib! Happy happy! Now, it's an older style crib and not nearly as nice as something new - but it's free and it will hold the baby until Precious is ready to sleep in a toddler bed. What a huge stress relief! No way is Precious ready to move out of the crib, not now, not any time soon. So now we don't have to worry about it. I think she is going to be even more determined to stay in the crib once the interloper arrives in her territory.

Hubby and I went out and saw a Capitals Hockey game with Kathleen T. and Mike L. Yippee. It was a huge amt. of fun, and the kids just adore the babysitter (Julia) They both brightened up when they saw her, and Pumpkin was still talking about her the next day. Michael Jordan recently became a tiny minority owner of the Caps, and he was at the game. So they showed him up on the score board and the place went nuts. And being at this exciting game (The other team scored on a penalty shot, but we won in overtime) really kept my mind off my back. I figure, how odd it is that I can be in these tiny little seats at the area and feel OK?

Mom came up last weekend. It was absolutely wonderful and I did absolutely nothing. Sat. was one of those days where I was feeling really frustrated and near tears, so Hubby and I took off to dinner and left mom with the terrorists! We went to L & N Seafood in town. Oh was that nice! It was great to be in the car alone, to be at a nice restaurant - to have there be a wait and have it NOT be a big deal! And because we left rather early, when we got home the kids were still up - and I was in a MUCH better mood! So it ended up being a really great day.

Also, 'Grandma' slept downstairs with Pumpkin - so he was a happy camper. She managed to keep him busy in the mornings, so Hubby and I got to sleep in. That really helps make for a great day. We all went swimming together on Monday (which was a holiday) and that was great. As we were leaving, another older lady said to me, 'You are really great with those kids.' That was very nice to say, especially since I don't always feel that way myself.

Funny story - Sunday night we were out of everything, and it was obvious that I wasn't going anywhere, so Hubby decided to go to the grocery. I just assumed that he would leave Pumpkin with mom and I, but without even me asking or anything, Hubby took Pumpkin with him. Isn't that sweet? (Have I got him trained well or what?) So that was cool; he's always really good about taking Pumpkin with him when he runs errands.

Well, Hubby's got both kids upstairs for my free final half an hour to finish this up. He's so great. We just put the crib together, and Hubby made sure to try to include Pumpkin, even though that made the whole project take at least twice as long. But Pumpkin got to hand Hubby screws, and also climb underneath the crib and hold the bottom up. Stuff like that.