Well, the BIG news in my life is that my dear friend Kath (C's wife and N'sauce's mom) finally had her second baby on Friday May 11. And I was THERE! It really was pretty neat. Unfortunately she had to have a C-section, which was not as cool as a vaginal birth. Although, since I've never seen a live vaginal birth I wouldn't really know, I guess. I've lived through my own three, but my eyes were shut!

Ok, first question - why was I, Captain Hyper, blessed to witness something as solemn and beautiful as another human being's first breath. Their first birth experience was very (VERY) traumatic. Kath was in labor for something crazy like 27 hours, and N'sauce got stuck in the birth canal - so they had to push him back up! (ICK) and then they did an emergency C-section and N'sauce wasn't breathing when he came out. So Kath was understandably nervous about this second birthing attempt. Well, you know me. I love birthing. I think the whole process is great. From the very beginning Kath thought I would be a good support person because I don't mind blood, obsess over newborns, and really think labor is a doable - nay, Enjoyable- process. Funny story - maybe a month ago Kath started to really worry about a vaginal birth. More than anything she didn't want to have the same frantic, terrifying experience as last time. The doctor thought that she would be a good candidate for a repeat Csection. Know what my first thought was? (This is TRUE) My first thought was, "wow, you are going to miss out on the joy of labor." I'm not kidding. More proof that not all my neural transmitters are firing. However, I told her my role as a support person was to give her an enjoyable birth, and if a vaginal labor was not right for her, then certainly she should think about a Csection.

It was a great day. Since it was a Friday I went swimming with the kids in the morning - which I look forward to ALL week long! So I get home and there are two messages from Kath saying that she is in labor. So I call her and she's not sure what is up. Her first birth was a Cs, and there are some concerns about both the current baby's size and her blood pressure. She thinks she's having a Cs, so she wants me to come to the hospital. So I take the kids to daycare and drive across town to the hospital and get there by 1. As we hang out the nurse asks obnoxious questions (anyone hurting you at home? you want your tubes tied? Etc.) and C fills out forms (and more forms) and I again thank God that I had Steath Baby at home. (I had Katie so shortly after entering the hospital (as in, immediately) that we never bothered with all the unpersonal, business side of having a baby.) This is where I am glad that I am here - see, the nurses are acting like Kath's is going to have a vaginal birth. And since her contractions aren't that strong or effective, they are talking about sending her home! So the two nurses are going to do a cervix check so I leave the room - meanwhile I'm thinking, hello? If she's having a C-section it really doesn't matter what her cervix is doing, now does it? So I'm outside the room and I run into C and I say look, Kath needs to stand up for what she wants here. She had a previous C sections, the doctor is worried about a vaginal birth, and she doesn't WANT a vaginal birth! TELL the nurses in NO uncertain terms that you want a C-section. I don't think the nurses realize this!

So C decides this is a good idea. So he goes in and talks to Kath about this and they talk to the nurses. By the time I go back into the little room the nurses are like, Your doctor wants you to have a C? Why didn't you say so! So at about 3pm they decide to do the C section at 7.

Meanwhile I have the minivan and the kids are in daycare. I was a wus (I SHOULD have stayed in the hospital with Kath! This is the only part of the day that I would re-do) Anyway, I'm thinking of DH - it's a Friday, traffic is going to be horrid, he's got the little car and no car seats, and he's going to have to get the kids, shove them in his car, somehow drive his stick home with Steath Baby not in a car seat, and then make dinner. This is NOT a good way to start the weekend. So I drive BACK from the hospital to home (which takes close to an hour) get the kids, take them home and cook dinner. I know, I know. I'm too good to DH (Smile.) But I know how hard it is for me to do things like make dinner with 3 hungry kids, or what's it is like to face them right after exiting the traffic filled highway. So I always try to avoid putting DH in situations that I would also find stressful. So on one hand I shelter him from a lot of agony, but on the other hand, on those rare occasions when I do take off for a day, he really can't be that aggravated with me, because it happens so rarely. And I knew that with his homecoming made a bit easier, I could stay at the hospital for as long as I wanted and he wouldn't mind - since he wouldn't have a kid-caused stress headache 15 minutes after entering the house.

Anyway, back to the plot! I'm home, we're having very low-tech dinner (mac and cheese with Tuna. Can I just tell you that my dumb butt kids LOVE boxed dinners? Mac and Cheese, hamburger helper -- the stuff they eat the most of are the easiest to make.) Then I get a frantic call from C saying they've moved the Csection to 6! ACK! DH is not home!! It's 5! How will I make it! So I call NeighborR who is willing to watch the kids till DH gets home (*I LOVE my neighbors*) and I get back in the minivan. It was funny, I sat in the driveway for 5 seconds hearing all the awful traffic reports and I say- if God wants me to be there, I'll make it. I'm not going to stress. Unbelievably I made every light and traffic was flying in my direction. So not only was I there by 6 - then they didn't even start surgery till 6:45. So I had plenty of time.

Surgery is odd. We have to change out of our clothes and put on the scrubs (which were very comfy and fun.) We have on hair nets, and also things for our faces that cover our nose and mouth (which were really annoying! There are plastic on the inside, so if I breathed to hard my glasses would fog up!) and even put these things on our shoes. But did they make us wash our hands? No. Like what is the purpose of covering my shoes if I still have potting soil under my fingernails? I mean, I had washed my hands just before going in the room on my own anyway - but it was still weird. They took Kath in there first to prepare her while C and I hung outside the room (again, very odd. We had to wait maybe 5 minutes - probably the longest five minutes in C's life - and there were no chairs? It just seemed that it would be less stressful to be sitting down on chairs instead of on some poor nurses desk.)

We now can have a discussion about what is wrong with me that I simply cannot watch TV horror films, which I know damn well are fake, but have no problem watching my best friend undergo major abdominal surgery. Yes, commercials have been known to make me cry, but I was not disturbed by attending a live surgical procedure. Worse than that -I'll be honest - I was totally fascinated by the surgery! Fascinated! You know, from the position up at the head, you can't see that much anyway (how much do you want to see, really? Except if you're me then you want to see everything!) How about if I NOT go into details. ļ Meanwhile, my brother has already passed out reading this. Ha ha ha . Later, the other guy in the recovery room passed out when his wife got her epideral. I felt so bad for him - honey, you aren't going to survive the C-section if you can't even handle the epideral needle!

C and I have little stools up near Kath's head and she's in the cross position with her arms spread out. I don't want to be in the way of C - so I ask him if he wants to be near Kath's head so he can help her or where I'm standing so he can clearly see when the baby comes out. So Kath is just lying there - and I remember from my own labors how critical DH's touch was. It was comforting to grip his hand - so I ask Kath if she wants someone to hold her hand and grab her hand to make her feel better. She's not feeling too well and the doctors and pulling, grabbing and pushing on her so like any good friend . . . I told her a dirty joke. The doctor is cutting away and saying "You won't feel any pain, just a lot of pressure" So I lean over to Kath and whisper - "You won't feel anything, only pressure. Just like sex while pregnant." I think Kath is the only person ever to have laughed while undergoing a C-section. The anesthesiologist is like "What did you just say?!"

It seemed to take forever for them to get the baby out - I think mainly because it has something to do with her previous scars - and then they finally pull the baby out. . .he was blue! It was kinda scary! They lift the baby up over the little sheet for about 5 seconds and then whisk him out of the reach of his loving and eager parents to put him on the baby table (More thanking God that I had Steath Baby at home! Best damn decision of my life!) Of course Kath wants to know why Baby Bemier isn't crying - I still remember how frantic I was when Steath Baby didn't scream right away and he was totally fine. I'm not about to say, well, he seems limp and blue so I'm saying they're suctioning his nose out and he's waving his arms at them. You're doing great, you're fine, he's fine. And of course I'm thinking - why won't he cry? Come-on baby! Breathe dammit!

This is where I became really useful. C was very worried about the baby - they are rubbing the vernex off him and slapping his feet and putting oxygen mask on him - so C is over with the baby leaving Kath alone on the table. So I went up to her head and rubbed her shoulders and helped her breathe. There was something up with the placenta, so it took just forever for them to close her up - and C went with Bemier to the NICU. So I don't know what would have happened if I wasn't there - probably Kath would have been by herself. And a C-section is pretty rugged, so my pain management techniques were helpful (I think.)

So I hung out with Kath for post op and then went with her to the recovery room. Maybe an hour and a half later C and the baby came back - and then C wanted to make some phone calls to tell family members about the newest addition. (In the meantime an emergency - serious emergency - C-section patient arrived so all the nurses were busy) Of course at that very moment Bemier became hungry. So there's Kath, still unable to move anything lower than her bellybutton and me. And an unhappy baby. You should have seen the comedy of errors as we tried to get Kath's bed into a position where she could nurse. We are lucky I didn't kill her since our original solution was to push the levers at the bottom of the bed that tilted her feet down and her head up, putting her entire body at like a 45 degree angle - which, since she couldn't move her legs and such, would have been disastrous if she had starting sliding down the bed. Eventually a horrified nurse noticed our solution and came back to level the bed and correctly lift the head and back only.

Wonderfully, I got to hold the baby for awhile, and every cell in my being called out to have another. My goodness to I love infants. I LOVE newborns. The coos, the smells, the suck noises, the feel of their head under your chin. It was heavenly. The baby was 8 lbs. 8 oz - he was bigger than Katie at birth, so why do I not remember her ever being so small? I stood and rocked back and forth with his head up under my chin. Love! And this baby is a 'pacifier' baby. He wanted to nurse and nurse and when Kath had to have her stitches and stuff checked she gave him to me, and he started to cry. So I gave him a pinky and he sucked on that contentedly for quite some time. I was like - either get this kid a pacifier or be prepared to be sore! He is going to nurse all night long!

So I stayed at the hospital until 10pm, when I had to leave since I was only a support person and not spouse or boyfriend or anything.

What a great experience!