Preface: A few quick notes from the DC area. I don't think I can describe what it is like here, especially for Hubby and I. I work within 2 blocks of the capital - and there is not a building between my window and the beautiful dome. As soon as I heard of the attack on the military, I got the hell out. First, I had no idea where Hubby (my husband, who is military) was - he could be in the Pentagon, or maybe not. I had no idea. Second, my way home is through the Pentagon. All I could think was "There is a burning building between me and my children. As God is my witness I will WALK around that building to get to them." And many of my friends were forced to do just that.

It is Tuesday September 11, 2001, a beautiful (Repeat: Beautiful!!) crisp day. I drop the kids off at daycare and proceed to the commuter parking lot to hitch a ride - my initial destination, the Pentagon. Yes, here in the 'homicide capital' thousands of us get into strangers cars twice a day, hichhiking rides to and from the Pentagon.

Getting out of the car and to the metro station at the Pentagon this summer has been an enormous pain, ironically, because the bus drop off and metro entrance are under construction - they are being moved to thwart any terrorist attack involving busses. The original bus station is perhaps a stone's throw from the building. After the Oklahoma City bombing, the powers that be decided to move the station over another stone's throw so that some barriers could be erected between the buses and the building.

Down under the bowels of the military complex I catch my train - my next destination: Union Station. I have the greatest job in the world, with the greatest widow view. Union Station is all of 2 blocks from the Capital, and the space between my building the Capital dome is simply trees and park. There are no buildings, and I have a clear view.

I clock in at 8:10. I get some coffee across the street at Union Station, set up a walking date (around the Capital of course) for 11:30, then back to the office for some web surfing - CNN, LanceArmstrong.com, Lactations, how in the hell do I find out who's winning the Vulta Espana? On to real work at 9. Moments thereafter Curtis walks over and says, you gotta check out cnn - a guy in the elevator says the World Trade Tower got hit by an airplane. I'm momentarily confused - You mean the World Bank in DC (I'm specifically thinking of the violent protests that have accompanied all recent world bank meetings, due to be held here in DC in October.)

I click to CNN.com and there is a shot of the first plane about to hit the building - what appears to be a small plane, there is no smoke or fire in the photo. It says only, "There is reported a second explosion in the South Tower." I can't even describe my emotions - I can only say, with no live streaming video or TV or even radio, the enormity of this completely passed me by. But as I view the tiny picture of a plane heading toward the tall buildings - the hair on my arms stand on end. Some instinctive part of me thinks this is a dangerous situation, while my mind thinks "Some idiot ran their plane into the world trade towers - how can that be? A "Darwin Award" nominee to be sure." Trying to refresh cnn to get more information causes by connection to go down. I call Hubby - babe, the world trade tower has been hit by a plane! (Notice, I did not say attacked, I never conceived of that) I call my dad who informs me TWO planes have hit both world trade towers and that smoke, fire and total chaos on TV. We speak briefly, I assure him things are quiet here in DC.

Another friend calls (her husband, as we spoke, was high in the Capital's Rotunda as a professional press photographer for the congress) shaken from the horrible news. So we decide to meet downstairs to get some hot chocolate. Before I leave the office, kmy father calls back - all hell is breaking lose, the pentagon is on fire! (I don't think it ever occurred to me that it was hit by a plane) At this point I announce to my fellow member of the cubical farm that the pentagon is on fire. We are strapped for information and everyone crowds around my desk. Dad holds the phone up to the TV and I repeat what I hear: The Pentegon is on fire, fires on the mall, White House evacuating, bomb threats at the state department, old exec office evacuating. Dad begins pleading with me to get the hell out of DC. I get off the phone with him and rush downstairs - Kathy! All hell is breaking loose! Go get your daughter (in daycare in a different building) and get out. At this point my survival skills kick in. I go home via the pentagon. How am I going to get home? A burning building stands between me and my kids? How do I get to my kids? Oh shit - where is Hubby?! Is Hubby at the pentagon today?

I'm in my office again - a quick note to say I'm OK. I look out the window and see smoke - either from the Mall or the Pentagon. I snap. I'm out of here. I'm leaving. I scurry to the head of all OEUS - Jack! You can see smoke out your window. He is astonished, looks back at me and says, time to evacuate. As I'm already in the process I actually RUN down the hall. But wait - Kath doesn't know we are allowed to evacuate. My office seems to far so I rush into another office and dial her number, no answer. I see Stephanie - we're evacuating. She too had already made that decision (she's also a vollunteer fireman) so together we actually run down the hallways and out the door.

300 thousand people (that's 300,000!) were released at the EXACT same time - all of us knowing the Nation's Capital was under attack, all of us able to look in the sky and see black, sick smoke covering the sky from across the river, no one knowing what was next or how to get home. I was able to get on the one of the last metro trains out of Union Station - and at every stop people were clawing their way onto the train, off the train, mass confusion. Not helping matters, a Stephanie next to me is a volunteer fireman, so every vague rumor was passed onto her via her fireman beeper (All engines to Pentagon; North Trade Tower has collapsed; Engines to Capital- possible bomb etc.) I sat trapped in the train praying to God for my soul and wondering about suicide bombs in the metro station. I got to Roslyn and there was complete Chaos. Then they announce that they are going to let some trains go through the Pentagon station?! I quickly decide I will take that risk rather than be stuck this close to town.

Unbelievably I was able to get onto a metro that went UNDER the burning Pentagon - Again, I cannot describe the surreal experience to go through a completely black, deserted station, on the wrong tracks, at 50 miles an hour, knowing the building above you is under attack. We stopped at the station before the Pentagon and picked up shell shocked military employees that walked from their offices, across Arlington National Cemetery, over electric fences to get onto a train and out of town. Anything to get away from town! When we finally came back above ground it was at the deserted, heavily armed National Airport. Looking out the window you couldn't miss the fire at the Pentagon.

At the last train stop I met a man whose office was hit. He had been getting a cup of coffee at the time and had nothing but his military id and 5 dollars. His shock was overwhelming. "I have nothing" he said, "I have no where to go." A woman came and led him away to a medical tent.

The area of the Pentagon that was hit was Hubby's office - except Hubby works off site. (thank GOD) As a result, not only do we know (if only by name) some the missing, but many of the shocked and scarred survivors of the attack are now housed in Hubby's very building - in his conference room to be exact! In one of the few humorous moments of this whole attack, the group of them spent Thursday creating an illegal cube farm in the conference room - and then ad hock (and not to Army regulation) hooked up computers, broke into their lan system and got back to work. Army ingenuity at it's best.

The tragedy didn't truly hit home until Wed. There is another man in Hubby's office, also named XX, and has his EXACT title too. I began getting calls from the Pentagon - This is Frank at the Pentagon, I'm worried about Hubby we haven't head from him; This is Rita from Human Resources, we're concerned about Hubby. . . and it really hit me - it could have been my husband, my husband had a meeting there 1 week later - EXACTLY where the plane hit - I sat on the kitchen floor and cried. I called Hubby to say, who are these people? And he said, Julie, don't tell them I'm OK, they're looking for the other Hubby Yates. (Age 50. He is in critical condition.) And out there is another Mrs. Yates whose husband is seriously injured. Hubby is dealing with this by refusing to deal with it. No TV, no radio - his new office mates have told him of their frantic search for their coworkers, of crawling over walls and struggling out of the Pentagon, the very last people to exit. He doesn't need to read written accounts of survivors, they are now working beside him every day.

And life will never be the same here. It is taking over 2 hours to get to work. Traffic is INSANE. Roads are closed everywhere. Highways by the Pentagon are closed for recovery efforts and the FBI. They are announcing on the radio - make sure to leave at least 1 hour earlier than you usually do. Everyone knows someone who is dead or injured, and several people in my community have sons and husbands that have already been deployed to the Middle East. Service to National Airport is vastly scaled back - which is 10,000 jobs down the tube. Meetings are canceled since individuals are unable to get to DC. We are going through the motions without true purpose.

After JFK was shot an individual said, "We'll never laugh again."
Pat Moyihan replied, "Oh, we'll laugh again, but we'll never be young again."

Right now it still hurts to laugh.