On Sunday, June 4th, we awoke to sunny skies. We called the DZ. Calm winds and clear skies!!!! YEEHAW!!! We checked the weather forecast.... sunny start with clouds moving in and possibility of a shower in the afternoon. LET'S MOVE IT!! We were already afraid we wouldn't get to jump because of it being too busy with a big competition going on.

Boomer again decided he needed a big breakfast and ate hotdogs!! Hotdogs!! Surprisingly, unlike the last weekend, (maybe because I didn't think we were really going to get to jump) I felt hungry and actually managed to eat most of a bagel.

A little before 8:00 we headed out the door. The sky was nice and blue. I was trying not to think too much because I was feeling pretty calm and I didn't think my body could take another day of raw nerves like last weekend. It had just physically and emotionally drained me. Boomer asked me a few times if I was alright because I was being so quiet. I finally glared at him and told him I'd be just fine if he'd only leave me alone!

We arrived at the DZ around 8:30 and the place was bustling. They had all kind of tents and stuff set up all over the front lawn of the airport and there were lots of cars and people everywhere. We looked at each other thinking, "Oh, no. This doesn't look good for us getting our jump in."

We see a King Air over by the runway and that makes us feel better. We parked and went into the manifest area and the first person we see is our instructor, Bob. We wave and smile. He smiles back. (That's encouraging I think...) Diane, who's in charge of manifest hands us each our waivers and points out one place we forgot to initial. Meanwhile Bob asks, "Ladies before gentlemen?" We answer, "Yes!" It was my idea.... so it was understood that I go first. (We hadn't wanted to be on the same load.... just in case... for our kids' sakes). Boomer and I look at each other. Do we dare start to think this is a yes for us going today????

Just then Diane tells Bob that they aren't going to use the King Air that was there... something about radio problems. Boomer and I look at each other again. That means going out of a cessna. Lower altitude... and that wing exit. We shrug. We just want to skydive! We'll take whatever we can get.

We look over and there is Bob writing my name down under Load 4 (later load 3 got scratched so I was really Load 3)on the dry erase board. Boomer and I glance at each other again. This is really it!!!! I feel my stomach do a little tumble. I see Bob write his own name after mine and I smile. I was hoping I'd get him. He's gained my confidence and respect and he has a quiet soothing manner about him that helps me relax and believe in myself. He puts Boomer's name down under Load 5. He starts trying to figure out who will be available when and finally puts down Jeff as my other JM and Doris will do video. He tells me I probably have about 20 minutes before I need to start getting ready. 20 minutes???????????? Oh my god!! I'm going skydiving!!! And soon!!!!

It's weird. I'm not really that nervous. Not anywhere near as nervous as I was the last weekend. The only time I really feel it is when Boomer looks at me with his anxious grin and silently asks me if I'm going to be OK. I start glaring at him and telling him to stop it! I think it bothers me so much because he never gets worried about stuff and if he is worried about me maybe there is a good reason for me to be scared.

We head out and go over the Cessna exit a bit since we didn't cover it that much in class. Both Boomer and I get to go thru it a few times. It doesn't seem too hard but definitely more awkward than the King Air or Twin Otter exit. But I think I got it.

I'm out in the truck getting my jumpsuit (I badgered the Minnesota DZ into selling me the jumpsuit I wore on my first tandem jump. One, I liked it. Two, I liked the idea of having the suit I wore on my first ever skydive. Three, I had seen the ugly navy mechanic-looking suits that Orange had!) Boomer comes out and tells me they are looking for me. I go in and Bob tells me I can start getting dressed. I step into my suit and double-tie my shoelaces tight! (I had recently read of a skydive death related to untied shoelaces and I didn't want them writing about it happening to me! I know they write those stories so other people can learn from them and not repeat the same mistakes but I still dread the thought of them saying if only this idiotic woman had or hadn't done "this".... )

I see Bob with my rig and all of a sudden this wave of intense heat roars through my body. I feel extremely weak and faint and hot and cold and clammy all at the same time. I think I'm going to pass out. I feel very close to saying, "Forget this! I'm NOT going! I can't do it!" I take a few deep breaths and start talking to myself. "Come on, Donna... you KNOW you can do this. You know you WANT to. GET IT TOGETHER!" The feeling subsides.

Strangely I go back to my previous rather calm state. We start putting all my gear on. Doris stops by and videotapes a bit. We find a helmet and goggles that fit. The first goggles he gives me fit pretty well but I had read they should be REALLY tight so you don't have to worry about them shifting at all during the dive so I ask for a tighter pair. Bob hands me another pair. They squish my head to death!! Good. I keep them. They are orange. Boomer and I say how our son, Conor, will like that. His favorite color is orange. We've tried to tell him NO ONE has orange as their favorite color but he just doesn't listen. I question Bob on my chest strap.... asking if he's positive it's routed correctly. He says, "Yes." He sees me still eyeing it and tells me how long he's been doing this. I tell him I know that but that I read stories about chest straps being routed incorrectly and where one person fell out. I see the look Bob and Jeff give each other. I tell them I know I'm nuts but if I didn't ask I'd be thinking about it the whole way up in the plane. They smile and tell me it's ok to ask whatever I need to.

Bob shows me my radio that will be tucked into a pocket on my chest altimeter. He turns it on (and I pay close attention to which knob he turns and which way he turns it in case someone forgets to turn it on for the jump!) He has them test it and it seems to be working fine so he shuts it off and tucks it in the pocket. Finally we are ready to head out to the plane. Boomer gives me one of his nervous looks again. I make a mad face at him and he snaps a picture.

Doris, who has been walking around taping the sights of the DZ (which I really like on the video), shows up again and tapes me walking to the plane. I'm a bit nervous again and I can't think of anything funny to say so I just walk along and I look like a snobby dork in the video. We all squish into the Cessna 182. It's cramped but not in the nice way that the other planes I've been in are. The other times we were all facing the same way sitting between each other's legs and it was a kind of cozy, friendly feeling. This is just awkward and squishy. I'm sitting way up next to the pilot and I keep thinking I'm going to accidentally hit something important of his.

We taxi down the runway and take off. Ironically, I've never been afraid of these jump planes even though I'm quite nervous flying in commercial jets... even despite the fact that about as many people died last year on the planes up on the way to make a skydive as those that died actually skydiving. All I know this time is that I'm the closest to the door and after we get over 1,000 ft I can be the first out if there is any trouble! That is, if I can figure out how to open that door. Why didn't I watch more closely when Bob closed it????

I can see the ground much better in this plane than any of the previous ones and I'm pretty damn calm and relaxed on the ride to altitude. I was really enjoying the rural countryside. Everything was so green. Bob pointed out the Quabbin Reservoir and later the Boston city skyline. I almost felt like I was just on a relaxing tourist plane ride.

Bob had me point out to him when we got to the 2 altitudes that would be most important on our jump.... 5500 (PULL) and 4500 (this DZ's hard deck for students to pull by). I had no trouble doing this. On 3 of my tandems I wore altimeters and had NO trouble reading them and was ALWAYS very altitude aware. I pulled the ripcord on the 2 dives where I was allowed to. Both times did it right when I was suppose to with no problems. I also had bought my own wrist altimeter and had used it on my last tandem and I had both that one and the chest one on today. Remember all this... it becomes relevant later!

All of a sudden we were at 11,000 ft. and on jump run. Bob opens the door and that mad rush of wind enters. I'm still not all that nervous. I'm thinking....Why the fuck not???????? I'm a neurotic, paranoid person. I'd always been terrified of heights. I always said NO way could I ever climb out on the wing of a plane and hang there and then skydive off it. But for some reason I just feel ready!

Bob starts to climb out and tells me to put my feet out right after Doris gets out (to hang off the back of the door ... only God knows how!) I try to get my shoulder past the edge of the door and swing my legs toward the step (the TINY step I might add!) and my right hand next to my leg. The wind is blowing so hard this is much harder than trying to do it on the mock-up on the ground! It doesn't help that you have 30 lbs (God I hope it weighs at LEAST that much considering what I had for an exit weight!) hanging off your back and 3 handles you are desperately trying to protect! I'm struggling to do it when I see Bob frantically waving me to get out there and grabbing my left hand and placing it on the wing strut. I forget all about checking with Jeff first for the go ahead and think to heck with doing it exactly as they told me cause I get the distinct feeling from the look on Bob's face that I need to hurry the hell up and get my ass out there! Little did I know at the time that poor Doris was out there struggling, hanging on with all her strength, waiting while I was taking my sweet time!

Finally I'm out there and in position and I look at Jeff and yell, "Check in!" He nods. I look at Bob and yell, "Check out!" He nods. Up, down, GO! We're off! ARCH! ARCH! ARCH! I feel us bouncing around a bit so I try to arch even harder. We stabilize and I start my COA (circle of awareness). I look out at the ground. I look at my altimeter. I look at Jeff. I see a big thumbs up! ALRIGHT!!!!!! I look at Bob. I see that smiling, reassuring face from class last weekend and another big thumb's up! I'm psyched!!! So far, so good!

I start my PRCP's (practice rip cord pulls). Look,(at my rip cord on my right hip), reach(put left hand above my head as my right hand reaches down and touches my RC), recover (back to basic free fall position). Look, reach, recover. Look, reach, recover. That seemed to go well. I do my 2nd COA. Ground, altimeter (I remember thinking I'm doing fine time wise but neither during the 1st COA nor during this 2nd one do I call out my altitude when I look at the JM's like I was suppose to so I don't remember exactly what the altitude was). I look at Jeff. Another big thumbs up with a smile. (I'm thinking... where are my bend legs, or straighten legs, or hips down signals????) I look at Bob. Yet another big smile and thumb's up! Oh, baby!!! This is going GREAT!!! Free time!! I look up at the camera and give my own thumbs up and stick my tongue out! I'm pumped!!! I glance at the horizon and then my altimeter. I read it as 6500. I feel Bob grab my arm and shake it. I look over at him and he seems to be smiling. I look at my altimeter. I read it as 6000. Hmmmm why did he do that? I get the feeling maybe he wanted me to pull. But I have 500 ft. to go and I didn't see him point (the signal to pull) though. My altitude is OK (at least that's what I'm thinking). The only time I remember him talking about shaking someone in class was if they really weren't arching that one jump master would let go and the other would "shake" him out and try to snap him into an arch. But I'm arching and stable. Hmmmm I look at my altimeter. I read it as 5500. I go to pull ... left hand over my head, right hand down to grab rip cord. Rip cord?????? What?????? I feel my canopy start to deploy and everything gets quiet and I'm alone. What the fuck happened?????? I didn't pull!!!! I'm stunned for a few moments trying to figure out what just occurred and then I remember... Oh, geez!! I should be checking out my canopy now!!!! Forget what just happened with the ripcord!

I look up. It looks fine. I see all the cells. They all look properly inflated. I check out the lines. They all look fine and there are no twists. I feel relieved and happy that I'm under a good canopy. And ummmmmmm ... I don't even feel scared! I had been really worried about this part. In the past I had felt a bit nervous under canopy. This is the part where you notice the height thing. I don't now though. I feel great! I don't hear anything from my radio so I figure I better grab my toggles and unstow the brakes. I'm a tiny bit nervous to touch anything and disturb how calmly the canopy is going. I reach up anyway and peel the toggles off the velcro. I pull them both all the way down and slowly let them back up. So far, so good.

DAMN!!! I can't believe I didn't pull the ripcord!!!!!!!!!!!

Still no word from the radio. Guess I better look for the airport. I do a slow right turn. Ahhhhhhhh... there it is. Big triangle. It would be pretty near impossible to miss! Still no sound from the radio. Better check out a left turn and make sure it works too. Do a nice little left turn. Gee... this is kind of fun!! And what a view!! I look all around and admire the scenery a bit. And I thought I'd be scared of this????? Gosh it's incredible!! So beautiful... and peaceful... and amazing!! I could stay up here for days!!

DAMN!!! I can't believe I didn't pull the ripcord!

But since I can't maybe I should start planning my landing since there is STILL no word on my radio. I think about double checking that it's on even though I distinctly remember Bob turning it on on the plane. I'm afraid to let go of my toggles to do that even though I know they said it was safe to do that and that I wouldn't lose them. Just then I hear words coming out. I try to make them out. It's not directions... more like a line of a song or something about Steppenwolf or something?????? I forget exactly but I really wish I could remember because no one believed me later and I got some strange looks when I'd talk about it!

DAMN!!! I can't believe I didn't pull the ripcord!

After that there was silence again. OK, maybe I am really going to have to land by myself. Funny, but again, strangely enough.... that doesn't terrify me. I'm not really sure I'm going to know how to do it but I figure I'll figure it out as I go along. I remember to pick a half way point and plan on being over it at half the altitude I'm at now. I think I was at a little over 3,000 ft. then. I realize I'm actually pretty close to the airport but because there is hardly any wind that should be OK. I start doing some long slow "s" turns and just then I hear this heavenly voice speak to me!

It's my radio guy and he has me do some turns and flares. I put all thoughts of trying to figure out how I'd attempt to land and just follow his instructions. They are different than what I expected. We don't do the typical downwind, crosswind, upwind pattern. I also realize after looking at my altimeter that 1000 ft. and 500 ft. and even 200 ft. are a lot higher than I ever imagined! I try to get a picture in my mind of these different heights for future reference.

OK... getting close to landing now!! I thought I'd be freaking out about now. But I feel fine. Excited. He tells me to do a small left turn. It makes sense. I heading back towards the middle of the huge bowl. Then he changes it and says make that a right turn. OK. I start to think .. where am I going? I feel like I'm going to land out of the bowl. Just then I see this little figure in a yellow staff shirt. Wow, I must still be up higher than I thought! He's so tiny!! Then I realize it's Little Jay, one of the JM's sons who helps out. He and his brother had stopped by our class the week before and they told us to look for them out helping gather up the parachutes. He's running this way and then that way... right in front of me! I'm thinking... what does he think he's going to do??? Catch me??? I'll kill him!!

Just then my radio man says, "3, 2, 1.." I start to flare and immediately realize I jumped the count again ... just like I did in class.... shit! Now what??? He sees my mistake and tells me to just keep pulling down slowly. That it's OK. I do and the ground is there and I have my feet and legs in a PLF position and my feet sink into that wonderfully, soft, cushiony sand and I let myself roll towards the right into what I think was a perfect PLF landing. Too bad Bob didn't see it. He had told us that when he sees students nicely step out their landings he thinks, "Ahhhh OK" But that he gets all excited when he sees a good PLF! lol

I lay there for a sec happy as a lark! I DID IT!!! I really did it!!!! Yeehawwwwwwwwwwwww! Little Jay comes running over and starts telling me to hold this and turn this way etc etc. Doris is there with the camera asking me how I liked it and Bob comes over and tells me Congratulations! I start questioning him about why he pulled the ripcord before 5500 and he tells me it was 4500!!! I'm shocked!! How the heck could that be??? I'm sure at first that he has to be mistaken. Before I can say anymore though, Doris has us pose for a picture and Little Jay is handing me my parchute and we are heading over to the truck for the ride back across the airport to the buildings. That ride in itself was an adventure! Trying to balance on this wagon-type vehicle with benches you straddle being pulled by a pick-up truck over very bumpy dirt roads!

DAMN!! I didn't pull the ripcord!!!!

When I get back I see Boomer all geared up and ready to go. He had missed the truck out to the landing field, but probably wouldn't have had time to get ready for his load if he had made it anyway, and with the clouds rolling in that wouldn't have been a good thing! I want to take pictures of him and he tells me where he stashed the camera. While I'm looking for it, Bob finds me and wants to go over my dive with me. He has me tell my version and I do. Then he tells his side. He agreed, yes I was slow getting out and tells me I didn't look at Jeff for the go ahead. But I tell him that was because while I was trying to get in position before looking at Jeff I saw him waving me out so I figured I better hurry and get out there! He thought the exit went good and my COA's were good. I tell him I had been expecting corrections and he said he hadn't expected to give any because I had done well in class, too, and that what you do on the ground you usually repeat in the air. He said he expected Boomer to get a thumbs down (signal for hips down) and possibly the arm correction one. (He was right... Boomer did get a thumbs down and on his video you could see his arms flapping around a bit and they didn't let go of his like they had mine). Bob said everything on my dive was going really great until I didn't wave off at 5500 so that's when he shook me to get my attention. He tells me then that he also pointed and I'm floored!! I never saw it. (And later when we watched the video I didn't see him point and started to think maybe he never really did but then when we got the stills, there is was...clear as could be in one picture... his finger pointing right at me and it looks like I'm looking right at it!) He says when I didn't pull then that him and Jeff kind of looked at each other like...OK... what's going on here? When it got close to 4500 and I hadn't pulled he went in for the pull. He says just then he saw me come for the pull but he already had it. In the video you can see me do it plain as day and the surprised look on my face as it's not there and I feel myself being pulled upright as the canopy deploys. I wish the video went a few more seconds to catch my expression as I realize what just happened.

Bob tells me that he usually wouldn't pass a student that doesn't pull but since everything else went so well and combined with the fact that he did see me going for the pull and knew if I had a few more seconds I would have, that if I felt comfortable going onto the next level, he would pass me. I asked him what the level II entailed and he told me about the turns and forward motion. I told him if I had the normal altitude so I didn't feel too rushed I thought I could do it. He said you didn't have to do the 2nd turn... that that was in there if you had the time. He said he'd leave it up to me and I could think about it.

This is what he wrote in my logbook. "Slow climb out. OK exit. Good COA, 3 good practice pulls, good COA, fun time. A few seconds behind pull - prim pull @ 4500 as Donna came in for it. OK for level II if comfortable." So to top it off I was really, really disappointed in myself for screwing up reading the altimeter of which I thought I had no good excuse for doing because I was familiar with altimeters and knew how to read it. I'm still baffled how I could misread it like that. And I was pissed at myself for not pulling the RC in time. Yet, I was also thrilled that I actually had the courage to make the jump and out of a cessna at that! A year ago I would have told you, "No way in hell would you ever catch me doing that!" And I do have confidence in myself that I can do the pull so now I'm just anxiously waiting for my next jump... which unfortunately won't be able to be until Father's Day giving that we can only jump on Sundays and this coming Sunday my daughter has a dance recital smack dab in the middle of the day.

(got these from his video... didn't come out that great... pretty blurry... still trying to figure this new program out)

Now for Boomer's dive. (This will be much shorter because I'm not him so can only tell you what I saw and heard and because of how short his dive was!) On his climb to altitude even more clouds rolled in. They almost called off the dive a bunch of times. You have to have a ceiling of 10,000 to get in the plane. Once you are up there you have to have at least 9,000 and then it's up to the student if they want to still do it if they can only get to 9,000. They barely made 9500 and I guess it was tricky finding a hole still and still have a good spot. Boomer still wanted to go because he thought I'd think he chickened out if he didn't go. (Geez! Men!)

Anyway, they decide to go for it. His main JM, Jay, who has been joking with him and kidding him to help him relax on the way up all of a sudden looks at Boomer and puts his serious face on and goes, " NOW YOU DO YOUR JOB!!!" Boomer climbs out and has a good exit. They are rocking a little bit but he does his first COA and gets a hips down signal and he fixes it. He does his 3 PRCP's. Starts to do his 2nd COA and sees it's just below 6,000 so as he says 55 to his secondary JM, Keith, he decides he should pull because he's thinking of my jump. He waves off and pulls. Like me, he thinks it is a real long time before he hears the radio. He's not at all worried though. He feels he could land on his own no problem. After all he did those 6 S/L on rounds all those years ago and this canopy can steer so much better. I was on the ground with the radio guy and it didn't seem like he was hearing us at first. He did the right turn at the appropriate time but never did the practice flare. He says he never heard that part. His ears had been blocked (and I don't think he hears all that great anyway... at least he never seems to hear ME lots of times!) so maybe that was why or maybe it was the radio. Soon he does seem to be responding but is making too hard a turns... pulling the toggles all the way down each time. The radio guy tells him no further than his shoulder and he does OK after that. Everything goes fine and he lands softly and then falls back onto his butt.

I run over to where he landed. I've never seen him so excited. Well I'm not sure excited is the right word. It's kind of a "WOW! I just had the most amazing experience and I'm still all jazzed up with adrenaline and I'm trying to comprehend all the just happened to me" look. He is still trying to take it all in and has this incredible grin on while Little Jay is very matter-of-factly checking the AAD, and altimeter, and gathering up the lines correctly.

We head back and I get to sit in while he reviews his jump with his JM, Jay. Jay tells him to start at the beginning as they are getting out of the plane. Boomer starts telling about the climb out and exit. Jay goes, "Do you remember seeing blue and then green and then blue and then green?" I see Boomer stop and think with this puzzled look on his face. He goes, "No, I don't remember tumbling". But he seems a little unsure until Jay starts laughing and says, "Good! Cause you weren't!" They go over the rest of the dive and this is what they wrote in his book. "Good climb out. Good exit. Slightly flat. Got arch from primary and responded. COA 3 PRCPs Pulled a little high at 6000, O/W (otherwise) good, Good c/c (canopy control) Cleared to Level II."

We stayed and watched our videos and thought they were pretty cool. They both had the dives in slow motion (along with regular speed too). The slow motion was really great because you could really see every little thing you do and could analyse it. They gave us our rolls of film and we stopped at a 1 hour place on the way home and had them developed. Mine came out awesome. Doris got almost every step of my free fall... all the PRCPs and COA's etc. We were really disappointed then to find out Boomer only had a couple pictures before getting in the plane and then nothing during freefall. All the rest were just pictures taken by his video guy from the ground of Boomer under canopy. Not sure what happened there. Maybe he forgot to do the still, too, or the camera didn't work properly or there wasn't time because of the low altitude they jumped from and then because he pulled high. We are hoping to find a program where we can make some stills from his video. I'm going out looking for it today as a matter of fact.

Anyway we were both pumped and happy and can't wait to try again. I'm jealous Boomer pulled and I fucked that up. He's jealous because he thinks I look like I'm falling so rock steady in my jump and he feels he's rocking around. We are going to practice and dirt dive a lot in the next week and a half or so so we both do real good next time. And you can be sure I'm going to pull!! No fucking way anyone else is getting my ripcord again! :o) That's MY job!!

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