Too Long in Law Enforcement
WARNING!
Some of the statements made may be considered offensive and are unsuitable for children!
YOU MIGHT BE IN LAW ENFORCEMENT TOO LONG IF:
* You have the bladder capacity of five people.
* You have ever restrained someone and it was not a sexual experience.
* You believe at least 50% of people are a waste of skin.
* Your idea of a good time is an armed robbery at shift change.
* You call for a criminal history check on anyone who seems perfectly normal.
* Discussing dismemberment over a gourmet meal seems perfectly normal.
* You find humor in other people's stupidity.
* You believe in aerial spraying of Prozac.
* Your idea of comforting a child is placing him in a papoose restraint.
* You believe that "Shallow Gene Pool" is sufficient grounds for arrest.
* You believe the government should require extensive testing and permits prior to reproduction.
* You believe that unspeakable evils will befall you if anyone says "Boy, it sure is quiet around here".
* Your diet consists of food that has gone through more processing than a computer can track.
* You believe chocolate is a food group.
* You have contemplated a seminar titled "Suicide-Getting it right the first time".
* You believe that "Too stupid to live" is a valid verdict.
* You have to put the phone down before you begin to laugh uncontrollably.
* You think that caffeine should be available in IV form.
* Your favorite hallucinogen is exhaustion.
* When you mention vegetables, you are not referring to a food group.
* It occurs to you one night that you have really entered the "Twilight Zone".
* You find out a lot about paranoia just by following people around.
* You are told to deliver a packaged human body part and you find yourself talking to it on the way to the lab.
* You believe it's not a good death unless it involves overtime.
* You are the only person introduced by profession at a social gathering.
* You walk into places and people think it highly comical to seize a co-worker and shout "They've come for you Frank".
*People shout "I didn't do it!" when you walk into the room in uniform and they think they are being hysterically funny and original.
* You believe in involuntary sterilization.
*author unknown*
Back to
Coplover's Homepage
This page hosted by
Get your own
Free Home Page