And now, a change to my normal Diary layout.

Sometimes a diary is nothing more than a cold, clinical description of things that have happened. Sometimes a diary has interesting stuff in it and sometimes it is nothing more than boring ramblings.

Sometimes, a diary is nothing more than a vehicle to let the writer express his thoughts, hopes and wishes to the world and to himself. A sort of confessional or a way of getting things off his or her chest to save from exploding from the pressures within.

I have no idea what category my diary falls into. Has it ever been interesting? Who knows? Boring? Probably, but everyone who has read it has obviously been too kind to tell me. A way to put my own personal thoughts onto the page just to get it out of my system? Oh yes! That last one is it.

And that is what today's diary is all about.

It is May the 26th 2003. Last Saturday saw the start of practice week in the Isle of Man for the TT motorcycle races. OK, if you are not a motorcycling fan then this is going to mean nothing to you but if you ARE a fan then you are likely to understand me when I say that I am having a hard time being stuck here in London, when the racing is on. I want to BE there. I used to go every year as a spectator. Then I went as a race mechanic for a large English team. Then I stopped going.

But Boy, do I miss it or WHAT? And to make it worse, quite a few of my close friends are either going, or they are already over there. And to make it EVEN worse, one of my closest friends, his wife and my God daughter are there.

Can I tell you about my God daughter? Well, I am going to anyway.

About 15 years ago I was flattered and extremely proud to be asked to be God father to my friend's new daughter. The christening was a great day and event in all our lives. Then, for reasons that even now I do not understand, I lost touch with my friends. Oh, we had the occasional rare meeting and odd telephone chat but nothing regular and I did not see my God Daughter from the time she was about a year old until she was about 13 or 14. And what a lovely girl she has turned out to be. It has been a long time since I met anyone with such a lovely, pleasant and bubbly personality.

We seemed to hit it off as friends straight away. From comments made by her Dad and other friends, she thinks that I am the best thing since sliced bread was invented and in return I think she is the greatest thing to have entered my life since the wheel. I have children of my own and I have grand children. I have nephews and nieces and I am an informal uncle to lots of kids of friends of mine. They all think I am great. OK, maybe they also think I am the uncle with the old joke book who still makes them laugh but they like me and I like them. They brighten up my life and I like to think that by making them laugh, I brighten up theirs in return.

Well, my God Daughter has made me the happiest man alive. In some ways she is the daughter I never had, in others she is the friend I always wished for. She has the very same, silly sense of humour that I have. I have not yet seen her unhappy, angry or moody. She is a true ray of sunshine. Her Mum and Dad are proud of her and so they should be but I am every bit as proud of her too and so very, very honoured to be her God Father and her friend.

And I needed to write this here because I am missing her like I would not believe while she is away in the Isle of Man. Why? Oh I don't know. Because I have no-one to talk to? Because I have no-one to pull jokes and tricks on me? Or to pull jokes on? Because the Isle of Man can be a dangerous place and I am more worried about her that a parent would be? Because I feel guilty at all the years I lost when I did not see her growing up? Because I feel I owe so much to her and her family for failing as a God Father? I guess all of these and more.

And that for now, is my poor excuse for a diary.