Today is the one month anniversary of Bradford's passing. I am to pick up his ashes today when I go in to have BOJA checked for her flight certificate.

Yes, I STILL miss Bradford.

Wednesday, February 2, 1999

It has been over two weeks now since my loss of Bradford. Of course I still miss him. I suppose much has been written that many people treat their felines like one of the family. As you no doubt know, that is what Bradford was to me. He was the son I never had.

That said, how am I to cope with what is really a FIRST in my life? Even though I've read about how to deal with this and there are those of you out there who have been supportive, for which I thank you, I know that I'll have to do this pretty much myself.

It is tough being tough when you are an emotional push-over like I am. I wonder if our community college offers any courses on how to become tough as nails when you are really a marshmallow at heart? Then the question remains, would I wish to take such a course.

Tuesday, January 19, 1999

The loss of a loved one, in this case a feline who became the son I never had, is felt in varying degrees at different times by this softy of a guy who was able to be there at the time Bradford was given his last shot.

The vet shaved a portion of the front part of Bradford's left leg so she could find a vein for the injection. When she tried for a time and could not find one, she went to his right leg where it had been shaved a few days before for the IV that he had. It was over very quickly.

During the time in the room where the injection was given, I had a fair stiff upper lip. Afterwards, in the main waiting room, I did get a bit misty when the vet, my wife and I were talking and making arrangements.

Bradford is to be cremated and the decision will be made later what to do in memory of the BEST FELINE who has ever allowed me to share his life.

One of the sad things about my long association and life of love with Bradford is that I don't know when he was born, but of course I do know when he entered his final sleep - Sunday, January 17, 1999. Someday perhaps I'll be able to use that dreaded "D" word here. From what I was told, Bradford was born in 1985. I figure that he was about 13 1/2 years old.

I will miss Bradford for the rest of my days upon this old ball of mud we call Earth.