The Weekly WOOF!

In This Issue:

National Pets Week!
Carpet-Chewing Caper!
Life Begins at Fifteen!
News You Can Use - That Skunk Ain't No Flower!

News You Can Use
FOOLPROOF SKUNK ODOR REMOVER!

Casey, Emma, Lucy & Angus, Cockers from Whisker-on-Sin (that's Wisconsin, for you hooomins out there) submitted a grrrr-eat recipe that every dog who loves the great outdoors should know about and share with their Hoomins. They write: "We have all the ingredients at our den up north but you can't make it up ahead of time cuz then it don't work!"

Take 1 quart of 3 percent hydrogen peroxide; add 1/4 cup of baking soda and a teaspoon of liquid soap (this breaks up the oils in the *skunk spray* and allows the other ingredients in the recipe to do their stuff). Pour this over your stinky smelly skunky sprayed doggie then rinse with regular old tap water.

HEARD AROUND
THE HYDRANT

A butcher notices a dog in the shop, and shoos him away. But later, he sees the dog is back again and notices he has a note and money in his mouth. The note reads: "Can I have 12 sausages and a leg of lamb, please." So the butcher takes the money, puts the sausages and lamb in a bag, and gives it to the dog. The butcher is well impressed, and since it's close to closing time, he decides to shut up shop and follow the dog. So off he goes.

The dog walks down the street, and when he comes to a crossing, he puts down the bag, jumps up and presses the button. Then he waits patiently, bag in mouth, for the light to turn before he crosses the road. The dog then comes to a bus stop, looks at the timetable and then sits on a bench to wait. Along comes a bus. The dog looks at the number notices it's the right bus, and climbs on, followed by the amazed butcher.

The bus travels through town and out into the suburbs; the dog watches the scenery. Eventually he pulls the cord to stop the bus and gets off, his groceries still in his mouth.

Dog and butcher walk along until the dog turns onto a path leading to a house. He walks up the path, drops the groceries on the step, then walks back down the path, takes a big run, and throws himself against the door. There's no answer so the dog goes back down the path, jumps up on a narrow wall, and walks along until he gets to the window, which he pounds with he head several times before returning to wait at the front door.

Finally a fellow opens the door and starts swearing at the dog. The butcher runs up, and stops him: "What are you doing ? That dog is a genius. He could be on TV!" to which the guy responds, "Clever, my foot! This is the second time this week he's forgotten his key."