My Tips on Woobie Care & Some from YOU!

My Tips on Woobie Care

It is NOT inevitable that a woobie will become evil. Just like us dogs, with proper care and training, inappropriate behaviors can be discouraged and you can enjoy days, weeks or (with VERY special care) months of companionship from your fuzzy friends.

1. Baby woobies crave the same sense of security that you did wen you were a pup. Therefore, to prevent your woobie from experiencing separation anxiety, you must carry it with you everywhere. Woobies who are left alone for long periods of time invariably begin to engage in mischief, which ultimately leads to EVIL!

2. Proper grooming is vital to your woobie's sense of self-esteem. Licking your woobie is only the most minimal acceptable form of grooming. It is much preferred to bathe your woobie regularly in your water bowl, or (even better) a handy pond or puddle.

3. Woobies must not be allowed to become overweight. Inspect your woobies frequently, If you can't easily feel their squeakers, they need to get involved in a weight reduction program. You will probably need to help them in this regard, as without your intervention they'll simply sit around all day feeling deprived and hatching EVIL thoughts.It is imperative to remove excess stuffing on a regular basis to prevent woobie obesity.

4. Any stuffing removed as part of a weight-loss program should be strewn about as broadly as possible. Otherwise, a well-meaning Mom might try to put it back INTO your woobie. When this happens,your woobie will begin to feel invincible and dominant, and dominant woobies are EVIL woobies!

5. Most Importantly! NEVER eat the Squeaker OR the Stuffing, or VERY EVIL things may happen to YOU! This is known as 'Woobie Revenge' and it can be very very bad for dogs! It is too terrible to describe, so just don't eat these things!!!!!

More Woobie Care Tips from Visitors

"Hi Blaze! I am a 4 month old Golden retriever and have I got a secret for you... When you find a woobie you truly love play with it and it alone, then, although this may seem hard at first, leave him in the yard - hidden from mom and dad, until they buy you a new one just like it. I have FOUR of my favorite woobie now!! I better get back to biting my mom's ankle or she might suspect something." - Bye! Midas Motomutt

"Hi Blaze - I have some woobie tips:
1) Always keep all your woobies in one spot, preferrably your crate, where you can lay on top of them so they can't be attacked by that awful thing... THE WASHING MACHINE!
2) Carry one (or even if you can, why not take TWO) outside when you go for walks... The best: Take one of those old Carebears that you would find in the basement corner - Just to embarass your master!!
3) Never put them down outside... Once I did, and something awful happened.... I LOST ONE...thank doG it was just one that I didn't like very much!! :)
4) If locked out of a room by a baby-gate, go get your favourite Sheepskin Woobie and hold it in your mouth... If you can, drop it over the top of the gate and then make a "pfffff" sound with your breath!! They fall for it every time!!" - Love, Matti (Golden Retriever)

"Hey Blaze! Don't forget now about how those fleecy woobies can resurrect themselves after you put them out of their misery!! Ya gotta be sure to remember to rip up their hides into little itty-bitty pieces and scatter them all over the house ... oh, and don't forget the 'insurance policy' for added security ... mix and match pieces of their hides and keep moving 'em around - that way they'll never get a chance to regroup and come back to life!!"
- Your Cousin, Ben (Golden Retriever)

"Hi Blaze! I've found out where the center of an evil woobie is! It's in the squeaker!! Every time Mom gives me a baby woobie, the first thing I do is kill the squeaky thing! Then everything is a-okay!"
- Pablo (Miniature Pinscher)

"Blaze, I have a tip for you: you can wash your woobie in the toilet. If you're quick enough, you might even be able to wash it BEFORE they flush... reaction guaranteed!"
- Lancelot (Golden Retriever)

Do YOU have a Woobie Care tip? Please share!

Now, check out some of these
"Close Encounters of the Woobie Kind!"