An Angel Unaware
by: Angel Friend Cathy

Saturday Ramblins, Vol. 1, No. 19 (September 19, 1998)

Recently life has handed me many things to bring worry. It involves the first person I have been able to allow myself to feel love towards since my friend committed suicide two years ago.

One night, when I was particularly full of worry and doubt, I tried to go to bed, relax and get some sleep. As I laid there thinking about "stuff" (including my friend who'd passed away), I felt a brush of something on the top of my head. It was so strong it startled me and I turned to see if my daughter had come into the room without my hearing her--that maybe she thought I was asleep and was trying to wake me to talk or ask a question. Well, she wasn't there. No one was.

I was startled at first, but instead of being afraid, a feeling of calmness came to me. All I could think of was it felt the same as when I brushed the children's heads when they were small, as I was comforting them and telling them it would be OK!

I was able to nestle into my pillow, fall asleep and slept through the entire night. In the morning, I awoke with a completely different attitude toward all this "stuff" and knew how and why I wanted to handle those things that bothered me so the night before.

While I am not sure of what happened, I certainly have some ides. What do you think? It's really funny, it has been a week since that night and I still have that calm feeling today when dealing with these things.

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