Saturday Ramblins, Vol. 3, EXTRA (October 15, 2000)

About ten months ago I faced a frightening situation. My late fiancée’s daughter Sarah, then eleven-years-old, developed some lumps on her face and neck. The doctors were concerned that they might be cancerous. Cancer – the same thing that had taken her incomparable mother less than two years earlier. Soon after learning of her condition, I dashed an e-mail off to a dear priest friend, begging him to pray that these lumps be benign, lamenting to him that I couldn’t go through this again, not with Sarah.

My friend wrote back and let me have it. Don’t try to write the ending, he insisted. Try a little faith and leave the outcome to God, was his message. But don’t I at least get a vote? I protested.

No way, was the dear Padre’s answer. This one’s in God’s hands. You get on those dimpled knees and start praying for faith and trust.

But I just want to tell Him what I want.

He knows what you want, was Father’s reply, minus a couple of descriptive words and terms. Have faith; have trust. (My Dominican friend believes me beyond help and salvation anyway, being Irish and coming from three generations of Jesuits and Jesuit education).

Faith comes in two forms. First, it is a belief in a set of doctrines and principles proceeding from Scripture, revelation and tradition. On a higher plane, it is a “letting go” – a surrender. It is becoming a little more like a son of God because the Son of God’s faith was so perfect that His acceptance and obedience to God’s will was perfect. Even in the face of his own death, Christ surrendered His will to that of the Father during prayer in Gethsemane (Mark 14:36).

Being human, it’s only natural to want certain things or certain outcomes to specific situations. This is especially true when the situation is perceived as dire or threatening. When faced with an illness or injury, we ask for healing. When undergoing financial difficulties, we ask for jobs or raises (or maybe winning lottery numbers). When our marriage begins to head for the rocks, we ask for this or that solution.

On the other hand God can see into every heart and know every heart’s desire and want. So, why pray to Him? He already knows everything we want. It’s simple: by prayer we acknowledge our reliance upon God for everything in our lives. We submit our will to His. By submitting our will to His will we become a little more like sons and daughters of God – a little more like Jesus Christ.

It’s hard not for ask for things we want or for situations to resolve themselves as we want them to. But, as God had a plan for His Son, He has a plan for each and every one of us. If we pray simply and honestly for His will, His guidance and His strength to accept what comes and endure it for His sake, our prayers will be answered and our lives and the lives of those we touch will be better for it. We will be true sons and daughters who reflect His light in this world.

(Note: Sarah’s lumps turned out to be a glandular infection, not cancer. The doctor removed them and after an antibiotic treatment, there have been no further problems. Thanks be to God.)