Kittypatt's Home Page For Teens

Hi there! 3-11 Are you honest when asked?.

Honesty is something many people play with, bringing it out selectively when they feel it’s ok. But to God, truth is important. You can’t have an honest relationship with anyone, whom you lie to. Or that you are not open with. Many people live behind a wall of secrecy, and I don’t mean to imply that you have to tell all to everyone. But you need relationships where you feel comfortable, safe. This used to be with your parents, but now most teens reject this source of love. When you begin to flirt with dangerous things, like drugs, alcohol, smoking, sex, you open yourself up to falling on your face. There used to be a song when I was a teen called “The night has a thousand eyes.” The Bible calls it your sin will find you out. Nu 32:23 But if ye will not do so, behold, ye have sinned against the LORD: and be sure your sin will find you out. God knows all, but in the end, frequently others will find out your secret sin. Then comes the dreaded inquisition by parents, did you do that? Frequently a lie is the first thought that comes to your mind. But wait. Even mean parents will be blessed, if not shocked by your simply admitting guilt. Get used to it. Don’t be of the Idiot group that blames others for their sin. In the end, you are given free will. You decide, you can’t even blame peer pressure. For God promises to give you a way out so that you don’t have to sin. Stand up, hang your head, be ashamed, and then confess to God, ask forgiveness and ask God to help you not do it again. Your parents are not the enemy. Who does God say is the enemy?: 1Pe 5:8 Be self-controlled and alert. Your enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour. Don’t let that person be you. Another version says it this way: 1Pe 5:8 Be sober, be vigilant; because your adversary the devil, as a roaring lion, walketh about, seeking whom he may devour: We are told to be sober. Did you know that most sin, accompanies being under the influence of drugs or alcohol? You see, the devil owns those who are not saved. Sometimes our lives are hard when our parents aren’t saved. But our honest, can make a big change in them, because we are following God’s plan. The Bible also says this: Eph 6:12 For we wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this world, against spiritual wickedness in high places. It wasn’t only Bible times that there were demons. We have them today. That’s why God says this: Mt 10:16 Behold, I send you forth as sheep in the midst of wolves: be ye therefore wise as serpents, and harmless as doves. When you lie, especially when you are asked, you open the doorway to hell, letting the demons into your life. Remember what the devil is called? The father of lies. So be a child of God, not one of the devil: Joh 8:44 Ye are of your father the devil, and the lusts of your father ye will do. He was a murderer from the beginning, and abode not in the truth, because there is no truth in him. When he speaketh a lie, he speaketh of his own: for he is a liar, and the father of it. If you sin, admit it. Confess it and be forgiven and rid of it. Don’t carry it and let it quench your spirit. Don’t let it put out the light that is within you. Ask for help from God before you get in too deep. He promises to give it. 1Co 10:13 There hath no temptation taken you but such as is common to man: but God is faithful, who will not suffer you to be tempted above that ye are able; but will with the temptation also make a way to escape, that ye may be able to bear it. Don’t let your life get out of control. Stop before you get in too deep. Love in Jesus, Kittypatt Come see my web site. It has links to the teen page and hopefully to my newer devotional for parents of teens, as well as to the marriage devotionals and daily devotionals. Also pictures of my family and me.

Anger: Part 1 Why are you so angry?.

That's a question God asked Cain: Ge 4:6 And the LORD said unto Cain, Why art thou wroth? and why is thy countenance fallen? Cain's anger showed on his face. So did Nebuchadnezzer's: Da 3:19 Then was Nebuchadnezzar full of fury, and the form of his visage was changed against Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego: therefore he spake, and commanded that they should heat the furnace one seven times more than it was wont to be heated. Now both of these men, were angry, and both did bad things out of their anger. One was jealous, well maybe both were. One guy wanted God's approval and it seemed unfair to him that only his brother got it. The other guy wanted power, to be obeyed , to be given honor, and when the three young boys refused to give up their God to worship the statue, (many say it was of Nebuchadnezzer himself), it really made him furious. Cain killed his brother, and Nebuchadnezzer had the three boys thrown into the furnace. We often have many reasons that we get angry. Sometimes it's because we feel we have been unfairly treated, like our parents favored a brother or sister. Sometimes it's because we were abused or mistreated. Sometimes it is because we are hurt by something done to us. Sometimes we get angry because we feel helpless. Try to identify why you are angry. Ask yourself these questions: Was I wronged? Was there any thing I did to cause the wrong? Is there any reason that I should be aware of, that this person may have problems that I should understand? Were my parents abused that would have made them angry and unable to cope? Am I being totally honest with myself about the nature of the problem and who is responsible? We sometimes lie to ourselves and believe the lies. For instance, when something is missing, we frequently think someone stole it. Or when somebody does us wrong, we often assume they did it deliberately just to hurt us. Is there any way that I can try to communicate with the person to come to an understanding? Is there any way to fix the problem that I can do myself? For instance, your little sister takes scissors and cuts your favorite skirt, can it be repaired? Knowing the source of your anger can help you to work things out better.

Anger Part 2: What It Can Do To You!.

In the last devotional we talked about how Cain's face changed. So did Nebuchadnezzer's. Their blood pressure probably shot up sky high. Acid began to build up in their stomach, making the future likely to be full of physical problems because of their anger. Anger is a danger to us. That's why God warns us: Ps 37:8 Cease from anger and forsake wrath; Do not fret; it leads only to evildoing. When we are angry, it leads us into wrongdoing. We don't think clearly when we are angry. In fact we are going on feelings, not on facts. Exaggerated facts to be exact. We are not fair when we are angry. We are impulsive when we are angry. We are explosive when we are angry. We can be dangerous when we are angry. And later, we are frequently sorry for what we did when we were angry. God tells us not to hang around with an angry for what it can do to us. Pr 14:17 He that is soon angry dealeth foolishly: and a man of wicked devices is hated. Pr 22:24 Make no friendship with an angry man; and with a furious man thou shalt not go: Pr 29:22 An angry man stirreth up strife, and a furious man aboundeth in transgression. What do you notice of any of these things happening to you when you become angry? Make a list of what you could do so that you don't have to do things you will later regret? What do you think would help you to control your anger? Who do you find your anger directed at most often? Is there anything you can think of to change to keep from getting angry? .

Anger Part three: Should You Ever Be Angry?.

Is there ever a time that you have a right to be angry? Jesus was righteously angry, when He through out the moneychangers from the temple. Mt 21:12 And Jesus went into the temple of God, and cast out all them that sold and bought in the temple, and overthrew the tables of the moneychangers, and the seats of them that sold doves, Mr 11:15 And they come to Jerusalem: and Jesus went into the temple, and began to cast out them that sold and bought in the temple, and overthrew the tables of the moneychangers, and the seats of them that sold doves; Joh 2:15 And when he had made a scourge of small cords, he drove them all out of the temple, and the sheep, and the oxen; and poured out the changers' money, and overthrew the tables; It says that he did this twice. He was outraged at the cheating going on in His Father‚s house. His anger was righteous. When we are wronged, we will surely feel anger. This is what God says about that: Eph 4:26 Be ye angry, and sin not: let not the sun go down upon your wrath: There are many reasons that anger has it‚s place. There are many situations that may not be fair. People do things wrong to you before they have a chance to think about things. There are mean people, (usually these people are those who have been hurt in their past, have not forgiven, and have become bitter about the unfairnesses in their life.), who do hurt on purpose. These situations may not be the most common reasons for your anger. Frequently our anger goes to those we care most about. They are most able to hurt us. The above verse is speaking of resolving anger before it gets to the point of doing something wrong. As I said before, we have a tendency to be impulsive when we are angry. We go on feelings, before we have a chance to think things through. Yes we do have legitimate reasons to be angry. Yes there are times when we will get angry. It's not a terrible thing to be angry. Tomorrow we will talk about what makes you so angry. Ask yourself these questions: What is the source of my anger? Is there any way I can think of to change my anger? What situations are likely to cause me to be angry? Is there a way to avoid how I react when I am angry?

What does the Bible say about Sex?.

Teens need love, and are trying to grow away from their parents, to become an adult. So they turn to their friendships to meet that need for love. Friendships of the same sex do all right for a while, but the longing to have someone to share everything with in a deeper way is something that needs more. You desire affection and a different kind of love than a friendship. Now, this becomes more complicated, because we are made to find a mate for life. But at younger ages, we are not prepared to marry. But our bodies have the desires that we will use in our marriage to become one, as God has planned. One thing that God also wants us to learn, is to have self control. This was born more into girls than guys. Perhaps it is because God made a device to relieve tension in guys while they sleep. The sex drive is very strong in guys at 15 especially. In other cultures, they marry earlier. In our country not many will hire some at that age. Also with compulsory education, the school system goes until the age of 18. In Biblical times, the boys went to work with Dad in the fields, and the girls were taught to take care of a home. I believe that was more of God’s plan than our system of today. But in our country, marriage at that age is out. But the sex drive is not. So we must learn two things: self control, and fidelity to our mate, before we are married to them. Sex makes ties that have memories that can bring trouble into a marriage. God made us to marry, and to have children and to raise them to leave us, marry and give us grandchildren. Ge 1:28 And God blessed them, and God said unto them, Be fruitful, and multiply, and replenish the earth, and subdue it: and have dominion over the fish of the sea, and over the fowl of the air, and over every living thing that moveth upon the earth. That was God to Adam and Eve. They went their way instead of God’s so eventually the sin grew so big that He brought the flood. The people had corrupted God’s plan and did things their way, as Adam and Eve had done. Ge 9:1 And God blessed Noah and his sons, and said unto them, Be fruitful, and multiply, and replenish the earth. God saved the remnant, and started over and gave Noah this directive also. Multiply= have sex. God put the desire there, made it pleasurable, and we come to where we are today. God’s plan involved marriage. Man’s plan doesn’t care about marriage. Just as Eve was deceived, the devil is still working to bring disobedience to the world. Sex with a lot of people, (when you start out, you expect to be with this one person forever, that’s how love feels, but reality is something different), leads to guilt feelings, which we can’t stand so we get a little harder, leads to pregnancy, and leads to disease. Aids kills, and condoms are not foolproof, so many are dying for sex. When we do not follow God’s plan, we get Satans plan, separation from God. Look what the Bible says about fornication (sex outside of marriage). : 1Co 6:18 Flee fornication. Every sin that a man doeth is without the body; but he that committeth fornication sinneth against his own body. It is such a temptation that God tells us to flee from it. We are to avoid being alone with someone we are attracted to. We are to avoid to get so physical with someone that it brings our desire and theirs. It’s easier to say no cold than hot. Instructions to to the Gentile believers (that’s non Jewish) included this: Ac 21:25 As touching the Gentiles which believe, we have written and concluded that they observe no such thing, save only that they keep themselves from things offered to idols, and from blood, and from strangled, and from fornication. Fornication takes your heart from God. Back to the verse from yesterday. 1Co 6:13 Meats for the belly, and the belly for meats: but God shall destroy both it and them. Now the body is not for fornication, but for the Lord; and the Lord for the body. God made a plan for sex, marriage: 1Co 7:2 Nevertheless, to avoid fornication, let every man have his own wife, and let every woman have her own husband. This is what God says about sex in marriage: Heb 13:4 Marriage is honourable in all, and the bed undefiled: but whoremongers and adulterers God will judge. Tomorrow I shall more fully discuss some of the consequences of having sex outside of marriage. That may take more than one day. I will also then discuss, what if I already had sex.

What if there is a child conceived?.

That is one of the consequences of sex outside of marriage. Pregnancy, a gift that brings joy to married couples, brings problems to a young unmarried couple. Panic, not wanting to be found out, the precious child becomes unwanted. It is easier for the father of the unborn child to say, have an abortion. Then the sin of fornication, turns into the sin of murder. Then begins the torment of guilt. Mostly for the young unwed mother. At such a young age, marriage is usually out of the question. How does the baby’s father work and go to school? He can’t make enough money to support that child. And the society, especially planned parenthood, even teachers, social workers, psychiatrists, all say kill the baby. Why? What did the baby do? A baby doesn’t get him or herself conceived. And then sometimes it takes so long to decide what to do that you reach the partial birth stage. How would you like to be yanked out of your secure spot in your mother’s womb and be brought out, have a hole drilled in your head, and your brains sucked out? And the guilt NEVER GOES AWAY!. Or if it does for the baby’s father, it never does for the young mother, who feels a loss, self loathing, and then sometimes even attempts suicide. And guess what the Bible says about the child? Ps 127:3 Behold, children are a gift of the LORD, The fruit of the womb is a reward. A reward. A gift. A good gift: Jas 1:17 Every good gift and every perfect gift is from above, and cometh down from the Father of lights, with whom is no variableness, neither shadow of turning. Mt 7:11 If ye then, being evil, know how to give good gifts unto your children, how much more shall your Father which is in heaven give good things to them that ask him? In spite of the sin of the conception, the LORD still gives a wonderful Gift. Ro 2:4 Or despisest thou the riches of his goodness and forbearance and longsuffering; not knowing that the goodness of God leadeth thee to repentance? God wants you both to repent. To turn to Him and let Him help you with raising your child. Sadly, an unwanted pregnancy usually leads to the end of the relationship. And then when the desire for a love relationship comes about again, with or without the child, you want to begin again and then comes the temptation to have sex again and before you know it, partner after partner, thinking each one is THE one. With the child being kept, comes a succession of different fathers, mostly never able to love the child as his or her own father could. The child becomes insecure, sad and lonely, longing for his or her real father. Please wait, for this reason if for no other.

What can happen to you because of having sex..

I am no expert on sexually transmitted diseases. I know that the experts are saying that the amount of different kinds of diseases are increasing. When I was young I only knew of two: Gonorrhea and Syphilis. I don’t know of any others. I know that now there are I think, Josh McDowell said there are at least fifty some now. Whatever, the one most talked about now is AIDS. That one is fatal. It isn’t really prevented by condoms either. And people who want sex, aren’t going to tell you they have it. They may not even know it either. And if you got a disease, and a pregnancy too, your child would be born with the disease. I have heard several sad stories about children with AIDS. The children get affected by other diseases also. And if the thought of getting a disease and dying of it isn’t bad enough, think about living a life with the disease, where no one, even your family wants to hug or get near you at all. Where everyone is afraid to be around you for fear of getting it. Did you ever see the story Philadelphia? It’s about a lawyer who gets AIDS. I watched a young man with AIDS in prison as his relatives came to visit and stayed their distance. We all like to be hugged and held, isn’t that what lead to sex in the first place? But when you have this illness, almost no one is willing to get near you. You don’t die right away either. This can go on for years. Sexually transmitted diseases can also make you unable to have children later in life. They make you feel dirty, and embarrassed especially since they want you to list all your sexual partners, and they also have to be notified. What if you had AIDS and slept with several people before you found out? Would you think of yourself as a murderer? In one of the passages warning against adultery is this statement referring to a sexual disease: Pr 5:11 And thou mourn at the last, when thy flesh and thy body are consumed, And in Roman’s it says this: Ro 1: 26 For this reason God gave them over to degrading passions; for their women exchanged the natural function for that which is unnatural,27 and in the same way also the men abandoned the natural function of the woman and burned in their desire toward one another, men with men committing indecent acts and receiving in their own persons the due penalty of their error. You see, you may think your partner is pure but you never know what they have been exposed to with another partner. You are a part of every person that person has slept with. People often lie about having had sex before. And sex is a powerful draw. How often the Bible talks about lust. Lust does terrible things to people. It makes them do things that they might not ordinarily do. TV, movies, porn on the internet all serve to make people desire to do perverted things. When you get these kind of desires, which I think are more common to men, you want to experiment, and with multiple partners. Which also makes the disease exposure more widespread.

Emotional Pain from giving up virginity and from continuing to have sex.

One aspect often overlooked, and this may be more for girls than for boys, is the feeling of loss when you give up your virginity. I remember a movie they had about two girls who wanted to see who would lose their virginity first. It seemed almost like a game. The one who did, said “it was just so personal” One thing they tell girls who are virgins to say to girls encouraging you to have sex is this: I can be like you are anytime, but you can never be like me again. This is so true. Your virginity, be it male or female, is a one time gift to your future spouse. Be faithful to him or her before you get married and your marriage will have a much greater chance of success. For most girls there is a strong attachment to the boy they have sex with. But to a guy, a lot of times it means little. Once you begin having sex, your conscience is somewhat seared. It doesn’t bother you the more it happens. But your heart departs from the LORD. 1Ti 4: 1 ¶ Now the Spirit speaketh expressly, that in the latter times some shall depart from the faith, giving heed to seducing spirits, and doctrines of devils; 2 Speaking lies in hypocrisy; having their conscience seared with a hot iron; The conscience no longer performs the job of watchman on your spirit. Oh prodding you not to sin. It becomes weaker and weaker as the Holy Spirit is quenched within you. 1Th 5:19 Quench not the Spirit. It is through the Spirit that God helps you to avoid sin. We who are Christians are no longer helpless against sin. Ro 6:16 Know ye not, that to whom ye yield yourselves servants to obey, his servants ye are to whom ye obey; whether of sin unto death, or of obedience unto righteousness? But another part of the reason not to have sex is this: it takes away the innocence of love, and replaces it with the need for secrecy, and deception. Where does most teen sex take place? On the sly, in places you would be embarrassed to be caught at. This brings and again I feel more for the girl, a feeling of cheapness, of resentment, of not being cherished. There is much selfishness found in the desire to persuade someone to have sex be it girl or boy. Sex in itself, is not as fulfilling as God meant for it to be in marriage: Heb 13:4 Marriage is honourable in all, and the bed undefiled: but whoremongers and adulterers God will judge. Guess what the Bible says about those who are Christians who are having unlawful sex? 1Co 5:11 But now I have written unto you not to keep company, if any man that is called a brother be a fornicator, or covetous, or an idolater, or a railer, or a drunkard, or an extortioner; with such an one no not to eat. Don’t invite them to your house for dinner. What if Christians followed the whole Bible. You could not invite your friends who are having sex. The world tries to tell you it’s no big deal, but the Bible says otherwise. God is the judge, not the world. It is Him you must answer to. Not your peers. Peer pressure won’t get you off in God’s eyes. Look what else it says: 1Co 6:9 Know ye not that the unrighteous shall not inherit the kingdom of God? Be not deceived: neither fornicators, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor effeminate, nor abusers of themselves with mankind, 10 Nor thieves, nor covetous, nor drunkards, nor revilers, nor extortioners, shall inherit the kingdom of God. And it goes even further: 11 And such were some of you: but ye are washed, but ye are sanctified, but ye are justified in the name of the Lord Jesus, and by the Spirit of our God. When you came to Christ, you became washed in the blood of the Lamb. Don’t be like this proverb: 2Pe 2:22 But it is happened unto them according to the true proverb, The dog is turned to his own vomit again; and the sow that was washed to her wallowing in the mire. We are not meant to keep sinning after being saved: Heb 10:26 For if we sin wilfully after that we have received the knowledge of the truth, there remaineth no more sacrifice for sins, Heb 10:29 Of how much sorer punishment, suppose ye, shall he be thought worthy, who hath trodden under foot the Son of God, and hath counted the blood of the covenant, wherewith he was sanctified, an unholy thing, and hath done despite unto the Spirit of grace? What are you doing to God’s grace? Heb 6:4 For it is impossible for those who were once enlightened, and have tasted of the heavenly gift, and were made partakers of the Holy Ghost, 5 And have tasted the good word of God, and the powers of the world to come, Heb 6:6 If they shall fall away, to renew them again unto repentance; seeing they crucify to themselves the Son of God afresh, and put him to an open shame. This is the Spiritual aspect, but we are made to be God’s, we are bought and paid for: 1Co 6:20 For ye are bought with a price: therefore glorify God in your body, and in your spirit, which are God's. It does not glorify God to have sex before marriage. And as I said since it makes you sneak and lie, and have it not be special, the relationship fades. You break up. It is inevitable! And you are sad for a while until another comes along and then comes the temptation again and again and again. God says if you are so tempted, get married: 1Co 7:9 But if they cannot contain, let them marry: for it is better to marry than to burn. This is another reason not to have sex before marriage.

What if I already lost my virginity?.

That’s where the best news comes in. Jesus died for your sins so that you can be forgiven. All you have to do is ask Him to come into your heart, and tell people that you’ve done that. That you are saved. Ask Him to forgive you. He will not only forgive you but cleanse you from things in your life that would lead you to sin: Joh 3:16 For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life. God knew, that before we were saved, we were slaves to our sinful nature, and to the devices of the devil, and of the enticements of the world. Just like Adam and Eve, we can be deceived. Until, we accept Jesus as our Saviour. Then the odds are stacked in God’s favor. That is, God is then in us, and it is He that gives us the strength to avoid sin. Php 4:13 I can do all things through Christ which strengtheneth me. You do not get the credit for being able to resist sin, God gets the credit. Now when we do fall, after being saved we must always confess it to God. This keeps the devil from making us feel guilty over it. When they brought in the woman caught in adultery, she was guilty, according to the Jewish law she should have been stoned to death. Jesus in effect, commuted her sentence, He would later take the death penalty. To her all He said was this: Joh 8:11 She said, No man, Lord. And Jesus said unto her, Neither do I condemn thee: go, and sin no more. That goes along with this scripture: Ro 8:1 There is therefore now no condemnation to them which are in Christ Jesus, who walk not after the flesh, but after the Spirit. Now you must understand this. When Jesus said go and sin no more, He was saying repent, turn away from that sin. And this other verse also says you must not walk after the flesh but after the Spirit. The next thing you must realize is this: You must forgive yourself. Maybe some people will not forgive you, but they are not the ones who count for eternity. Maybe there may be some consequences you face, but when God forgives, He never holds it against you again. He actually decides to forget it. Heb 8:12 For I will be merciful to their unrighteousness, and their sins and their iniquities will I remember no more. Heb 10:17 And their sins and iniquities will I remember no more. So if you start to feel guilty, remember that the condemnation is not from God. God wants you to have a clean slate. And here is a good Scripture: Joe 2:25 And I will restore to you the years that the locust hath eaten, the cankerworm, and the caterpiller, and the palmerworm, my great army which I sent among you. God will restore you. Even that mean guy Nebuchadnezzer, when He repented and accepted God was restored, after he went crazy and became like a beast. Da 4:33 The same hour was the thing fulfilled upon Nebuchadnezzar: and he was driven from men, and did eat grass as oxen, and his body was wet with the dew of heaven, till his hairs were grown like eagles' feathers, and his nails like birds' claws. Eventually Nebuchadnezzer realized how great God was and this is what God did for him: 36 At the same time my reason returned unto me; and for the glory of my kingdom, mine honour and brightness returned unto me; and my counsellors and my lords sought unto me; and I was established in my kingdom, and excellent majesty was added unto me. God gave him back his respect among men, and God does the same thing for all His children. Your forgiving yourself is as much a commmandment as your forgiving others. Just like you are to love yourself. Mr 11:26 But if ye do not forgive, neither will your Father which is in heaven forgive your trespasses. You may not feel like you should be forgiven, but your feelings are not facts. It is God’s plan that counts. And He always has a plan for your life, no matter what you have done or what has been done to you. Jer 29:11 'For I know the plans that I have for you,' declares the LORD, 'plans for welfare and not for calamity to give you a future and a hope. God can use your experiences to help others: Ro 8:28 And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to his purpose. God will bring someone into your life to be a mate, when it’s time, who will be able to accept you. God will supply all your need. (Even if it’s a need for sex. ) Php 4:19 But my G