Q: Where does Navi go at the very end of the game when she flies out of the window?
A: She meets with her agent in an attempt to get a role as Tinkerbell in the live-action Peter Pan movie, which recently was released in theaters. (Sans Navi.) When that didn't work out, she contacted Shigeru Miyamoto about starring in her own video game. But when negotiations for "The Legend of Navi: Hey! Listen!" fell through, she was once again without work. Although she has been on hiatus for the past few years, the outlook for her appears optimistic: rumors say that if she appears in several public televesion commercials regarding the financial status of California, the state's governor, Arnold Schwarzenegger (R-California) will agree to co-star with her in a feature film, tentatively titled "Navi Meets Terminator." Stay tuned.
Q: What's up with that owl?
A: Kaepora Gaebora, the owl who appeared so annoyingly throughout "The Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time", is currently scheduled to appear in court. Link has sued him for causing irrevocable mental damage to his childhood innocence. According to Gaebora's attorney, the owl plans to plead the Twinkie Defense.
Q: What has happened to the Goron King?
A: He is a spokesperson for the Atkins Diet and also makes regular guest appearances demonstrating Tae-Bo on the Today show.
Q: If Gannondorf is the only male born every 100 years among the Gerudo, then exactly how...
A: We would prefer not to answer that question.
Q: Is it true that Namco was given license to use Link in Soul Calibur II because Link lost a bet?
A: Yes. However, the urban legend that has been floating around recently regarding this is not entirely true. In the myth, Link got a little out of control out of a game of Poker and wound up betting Namco that he would appear in one of their games if he lost-- which he did. However, in reality, Link lost the bet over something slightly less glamourous. It was a game of Pac-Man on Namco's new TV Plug-In Joystick.
Q: Guess what! If you look through the Hyrule Castle's windows at the right angle, you can see Mario!!!
A: First of all, the world has known about that trick since the Bolshievik Revolution. Secondly, that's not a question.
Q: Will killing the Skull Kid really give you 1000 rupees?
A: No. That was false doctrine that was originally spread by the stoned nerd on a free Nintendo video. In truth, killing the Skull Kid will only give you 200 rupees.
Q: What is Link's political affiliation?
A: The answer to this question can actually be found by looking closely at certain symbols hidden throughout the game, mostly on big blue blocks that you can push around. He's a communist, by the way.
Q: How is it that the Zora clothes can make Link breathe underwater?
A: Well, Link is really just a big amalgamation of 1's and 0's and pixels and sprites, or something like that. In other words, he is just a computer-generated character and thus he is able to do things like that. It also helps to have connections to the Mafia, which Link reportedly does.
Q: Where did Ganon learn to play the organ?
A: The organ is a sensitive subject for Ganon; he was taught since childhood by his mother. Every evening after school, she would instruct him on their custom-made home organ. While Ganon was still in fifth grade, she was involved in an unfortunate accident: she was instantly killed by a fatal hookshot blow to the head. From that day forward, just looking at an organ would put Ganon in a state of severe emotional disarray. And that explains how he turned into the monster after not just looking at an organ, but playing it towards the end of the game.
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