Now this is a state that knows how
to live!! Beautiful sunny days and
warm balmy evenings. Mountains
and deserts blended together. What a place!
Watched the sunset from a park lying
on a blanket. It was beautiful.
I've finally found my home.
I love it here.
June 14th
Really heating up. Got to 100
today. Not a problem. Live in an
air-conditioned home, drive an air-conditioned
car. What a pleasure to see
the sun every day like this.
I'm turning into a real sun worshipper.
June 30th
Had the backyard landscaped with western
plants today. Lots of cactus
and rocks. What a breeze to
maintain. No more mowing for me. Another
scorcher today, but I love it here.
July 10th
The temperature hasn't been below 100
all week. How do people get used
to this kind of heat? At least
it's a dry heat. Getting used to it is
taking longer than I expected.
July 15th
Fell asleep by the pool. (Got
3rd degree burns over 60% of my body.)
Missed two days of work, what a dumb
thing to do. I learned my lesson though:
got to respect the ol' sun in a climate
like this.
July 20th
I missed Tabby (our cat) sneaking into
the car when I left this morning.
By the time I got out to the hot car
for lunch, Tabby had swollen up to the size of
a shopping bag and exploded all over
$2,000 worth of leather upholstery.
I told the kids she ran away.
The car now smells like Kibbles and s--t.
No more pets in this heat!
July 27th
Dry heat, my butt. Hot is hot!!
The home air-conditioner is on the fritz
and AC repairman charged $200 just
to drive by and tell me he needed to
order parts.
July 30th
Been sleeping outside by the pool for three
nights now. $1,100 monthly
in damn house payments and we can't even
go inside. Why did I ever come
here?
Aug 4th
115 degrees. Finally got the
air-conditioner fixed today. It cost $500
and gets the temperature down to about
90. Stupid repairman peed in my
pool. I hate this state.
Aug 8th
If another wise acre cracks, "Hot enough
for you today?", I'm going to
tear his throat out. Damn
heat. By the time I get to work the radiator
is boiling over, my clothes are soaking
wet, and I smell like roasted
Garfield!!
Aug 10th
The weather report might as well be
a damn recording: Hot and Sunny.
It's been too hot to make love for
two damn months and the weatherman says
it might really warm up next week.
Doesn't it ever rain in this barren damn
desert?? Water rationing has been
in effect all summer, so $1,700 worth of cactus
just dried up and blew into the pool.
Even a cactus can't live in this heat!!
Aug 14th
Welcome to Hell!!! Temperature
got to 123 today. Forgot to crack the
window and the heat blew the window
out of the Lincoln. The installer
came to fix it and said, "Hot enough
for you today?" My wife had to
spend the $1,100 house payment to
bail me out of jail.
Aug 30th
Worst damn day of the summer.
I'm not leaving the house. The monsoon
rains finally came and all they did
is to make it muggier than hell.
The Lincoln is now floating somewhere
in Mexico with it's new $500
windshield.
That does it, we're moving to New
York for some peace and quiet!