Okay all you gals and guys out there. I have been going to the
chat house now for like over a year now and some of the pick up
lines I have encounterd and seen are either pathetic or funny or
just down right gross. Yes I have come across a few that would
win my heart, but ya see my heart don't need winning for it is
already won and he did that by being himself. *soft smile* But
some of these are really funny and some really sad. *L* So read
and enjoy, who knows ya might come across that might work for ya!
But I doubt it. *L*
I have classified these into three catigories, Winners, Losers, and want to get slapped?!?! *L*
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
~Losers~
*Can I buy you a drink or do you just want the money??
*Gee that's a nice set of legs, what time do they open??
*Hey baby! I'd like to use your thighs as earmuffs.
*Hey baby, whatdya say we go behind a rock and get a little boulder?!?!
*Let's go to my place and do things I'll tell everyone we did anyways!
*My name is _____. That's so you know what to scream.
*What do you say we go back to my room and do some math: add a bed, subtract our clothes, divide your legs, and multiply.
*Your place or mine? Tell you what? I'll flip a coin. Head at my place, tail at yours.
*Excuse me do you have a mirror in your pocket? Cause I can sure see myself in your pants!!
*Your eyes are blue like the ocean, and baby? I am lost at sea.
*Baby, if you were words on a page, you'd be what they call FINE PRINT!!
*You are just truly absoultely beautiful! Can you cook and clean also?
*I'm feeling a little off today. Would you like to turn me on??
*Baby, I am an american express lover....You shouldn't go home without me!!
~Winners...Maybe??~
*Do you believe in love at first sight, or should I walk by again?
*Am I dead, angel? Cause this must be heaven!!
*Baby, somebody better call God, cuz he's missing an angel!
*Did It hurt? When you fell from heaven??
*Hello, I'm a thief, and I'm here to steal your heart.
*How was heaven when you left it??
*If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put U and I together!!
*If I followed you home, would you keep me?
*What time do you have to be back in heaven??
*Would you touch me so I can tell my friends that I have been touched by an angel??
*May I look at the label in your shirt? Cuz I bet it says "Made in Heaven"!!
*You must be a snickers, because you satisfy me!!
*Hello. Cupid called. He says to tell you that he needs my heart back.
*Know what I like about you? My arms!!
*I hope you know CPR, cuz you take my breath away!!
~Wanna get Slapped??~
*Hey baby, wanna lock crotches and swap gravy?
*The only reason I would kick you out of bed would be to f**k you on the floor!!
*Nice legs....lets eat out!!
*Mean people suck...nice people swallow. I'm nice!
*First I'd like to kiss you passionately on the lips, then, I'll move up to your belly button.
*Hey babe, can you suck a golf ball thru 50 feet of garden hose?
*Why you got the whitest teeth I'd ever want to cum across!!
*If you were a booger I'd pick you first!
*(he uses his index finger to call you over and than says) I made you come with one finger, imagine what I can do with my whole hand.
*Hi, my name is "Milk". I'll do your body good!!
*There are 265 bones in the body. How'd ya like one more?
*Yeah it's big and if ya pet it, it spits!!
Now if ya want to know how to
make a man feel real small and suffer from the famous disease of shrink dink......READ ON!! *EG*
~Rejecting pick up lines~
**Him: "Haven't we met before?
You: "Yes, I work at the V.D. Clinic!!
**Him: "So, wanna go back to my place?
You: "Well, I don't know. Will two people fit under a rock?
**Him: "I'd really like to get into your pants."
You: "No thanks. There's already one asshole in there!"
**Him: "I'd like to call you. What's your number?"
You: "It's in the phone book."
Him: "But I don't know your name."
You: "That's in the book too!"
**Him: "So what do you do for a living?"
You: "Female Impersonator."
**Him: "How do you like your eggs in the morning?"
You: "Unfertilized. Screw off!"
Well that is about it for now....if you get any strange ones let me know and I will put them here!! See ya...take care all and be safe!! OOOOoooosh!!
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