jokes

Jokes R Us!

Knock Knock Jokes

Knock Knock! Who's there? Goat. Goat to the door and find out.	Knock Knock! Who's there? Amos. Amos who? Amosquito just bit me!
Knock Knock! Who's there? Duane! Duane who? Duane the bathtub, I'm dwowning!	Knock Knock Who's there? Olive Olive who? Olive You!
Knock knock Who's there? Banana. Banana who? Knock knock Who's there? Banana. Banana who? Knock knock Who's there? Orange. Orange who? Orange you glad I didn't say banana?	Knock Knock Who's there? Harry Harry Who? Harry Up and open this door
"Knock, knock." "Who's there?" "Who." "Who who?" "Is there an owl in here?"	Knock-Knock Who's there? Ken Ken who? Ken you please pass the peas?
Knock-Knock Who's there? Boo. Boo who? Don't cry it's only a joke!	Knock, Knock. Who's there? Barbie Barbie who? Barbie Q
Knock, Knock. Who's there? Goliath Goliath who? Goliath down, you looketh tired.	Knock, knock. Who's there? Catch. Catch who? God bless you!
Knock Knock Who's there ? Lettuce Lettuce who? Lettuce in it's cold out here!!	Knock, Knock. Who's there? Mikey Mikey who? My key is lost, let me in!!

Riddles & Jokes

Q.Where does a cat go when it loses its tail?
A. The retail store.

Q. Why did the frog go to the hospital?
A. To keep from croaking

Q. Why did the boy throw the clock out the window?
A. To see time fly!

Q. What animal needs oiling?
A. A mouse because it squeaks

Q. Why was six afraid of seven?
A. Because seven, eight, nine

Q. Why did the computer squeak.
A. Because someone stepped on it's mouse

Q. Why did the chicken cross the playground?
A. To get to the other slide!!

Q. How does a farmer keep track of all his or her cattle?
A. With a cowculator.

Q. What did the lizard say to his girlfriend?
A. Iguana love you forever.

Q. Where do sheep get their hair cut?
A. At the Baa-Baa Shop

Q. How did Noah build the arch?
A. He studied archeology!

Q. How much do pirates pay for their earrings?
A. Buccaneer

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What doesn't get any wetter, no matter how much it rains?
The ocean.

You're a bus driver. At the first stop 4 people get on. At the second stop 8 people on, at the third stop 2 people get off and, at the forth stop everyone got off. The question is what color are the bus drivers eyes?
The bus drivers eyes are the same color as yours, of course. Because, you are the bus driver!

What has a mouth but doesn't eat, a bank with no money, a bed but doesn't sleep, and waves but has no hands?
A river

A man went outside in the pouring rain with no protection, but not a hair on his head got wet...how come?
The man did not get a single hair wet because he is bald.

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