Lesson 20
Home - The Wife's Domain-Part One: A Worker at Home
The following is a summary adaptation taken from The Excellent Wife, by Martha Peace. Used by permission.
I can definitely say that these lessons in connection with the Word of God, have been very useful and profitable for me in my walk with the Lord. They are unlike any other study that I've done before and I am very grateful to God for allowing us to take this spiritual journey together.
I believe it is fitting for us to begin discovering the wife's home-based ministry after we've studied how the wife is to be devoted to Christ, and to have her desire set on pleasing the Lord, (Lesson 18 & 19). Keep in mind that as God's special lady, you are to desire to please the Lord `regardless' of your circumstances. You can begin praying to the Lord to develop in you a spirit of joy and gratitude as you serve Him wholeheartedly.
In this chapter, (Chapter eight of The Excellent Wife Book), Mrs. Peace starts off by giving us an illustration of two young wives/mothers. They're both Christian's but different in some ways. Let's examine the two.
"Wife/Mother A" is very `busy'. She's involved in many activities outside of the home, both in church and in her children's school. She doesn't know how to say "no" and therefore is not at home one single day of the week. Her husband asked her to "slow down," yet she replies, "All the things I'm doing are good and besides, they all need me."
On the other hand, "Wife/Mother B" is lazy. She does stay home. She spends most of her time talking on the telephone, (which she loves). She stays up late watching television or reading, so she sleeps late. The kids have to fend for themselves because she's too tired to get up. She starts projects, and has good intentions, yet she never follows through. Her husband has asked her to do her work and to see to it that the children' s needs are taken of.
Think about these two women for a moment. Can you relate to either of these? I can definitely see patterns that if left alone, will certainly lead to disorder.
Both women have a desire to obey and please the Lord. What needs to happen, which oftentimes can be difficult and painful, is for each of them to stop, and reassess their lifestyles along with their biblical responsibilities of the home. Usually we get into trouble when we substitute our God-given-responsibilities with the pl asures of our lifestyle. The Lord intends for the wife to cultivate an atmosphere of love and one of optimism, so that she can operate her home without the least possible chaos.
For many women today, even Christian women, the belief that a wife's domain, her calling, is in the home is not a popular one. However, I encourage you to search the scriptures and compare what God's Word teaches, contrary to what may be "popular." Ask God to show you what His will is for you and then to give you the courage to obey Him, regardless of what others are/aren't doing. You have the responsibility to follow the Lord's plan, not man's.
In Titus 2:5, it states that the wife is to be a "keeper at home." The word "keeper" can be expressed in a like manner as the word "worker." What does it mean to be "a worker at home?" On page 72, Mrs. Peace explains it as this:
"In the Greek, "worker at home" is one word, `olkouros', which comes from two root words. `Oikos', which means "a dwelling, a home, or a household" and 'ergon,' which means "to work or be employed." So, a "worker at home" is someone who guards the dwelling or is a keeper of the household." So, for the wife to "work at home", she must "be at home."
In the book of Proverbs, chapter 31 there are about nine (9) verses that speak directly to The Excellent Wife's ministry revolving around the home; her world begins with her family.
She looks for wool and flax, and works with her hands in delight... She rises also while it is still night, and gives food to her household, and p ortions to her maidens... She considers a field and buys it, from her earnings she plants a vineyard... her lamp does not go out at night...She stretches out her hands to the distaff, and her hands grasp the spindle... ... all her household are clothed with scarlet... She makes coverings for herself; her clothing is fine linens and purple... She makes linen garments and sells them, and supplies belts to the tradesmen... She looks well to the ways of her house, and does not eat the bread of idleness. (Prove rbs 31:13, 15-16, 18-19, 21-22, 24, 27.)
Look at the end of verse 27; I love this statement and it has certainly become a prayer of mine: "... SHE LOOKS WELL TO THE WAYS OF HER HOUSE, AND DOES NOT EAT THE BREAD OF IDLENESS."
Again, her home is her domain and her ministry involves her family. As a result, she experiences a genuine satisfaction in the work that she does. It is needful for me to point out that ALL Scripture is profitable for every situation that you I and face today. The truths found in God's Word are fitting, and able to benefit us in this very moment.
Carefully study Titus 2:3-5. Older women (are to) teach what is good... that they may encourage the young women to love their husbands, to love their children, to be sensible, pure, workers at home, kind, being subject to their own husbands....
And I Timothy 5:14-15: "Therefore, I want the younger widows to get married, bear children, keep house, and give the enemy no occasion for reproach; for some have already turned aside to follow Satan."
The Apostle Paul wrote to the church concerning this very issue and the instruction in both passages are similar: "Worker or Keeper at home," Titus 2:3-5, and "guide or keep house," I Timothy 5:14-15.
It becomes clear that God has set the wife in her role in order that she fulfill her God-given position. He has also predetermined the guidelines for the family's protection, under the wife who yields to His plan. God and the family is honored by the wife's obedience.
When a wife `deliberately' goes agai nst the principles of God's Word and takes `lightly' her responsibility in carrying out those standards in the home, she blasphemes the Word of God. How? you might ask. She demonstrates to others that she lacks `reverence' for God's Word. Her actions speak out AGAINST God's truth. The scripture also says that she gives Satan an `opportunity' to accuse her of her faults and cause her great shame. Her testimony of the Lord is then weakened and she dishonor's the Lord. A wife's walk should always be consist ent with her speech.
When a wife fills up her day with business and activities that take her away from her family, and ties her up to the point that she cannot perform her duties in the home (remember these are duties set-forth by God), she opens up an avenue for temptation and sin. Again, the scripture in I Timothy 2:15 declares, "For some have already turned aside to follow Satan." Satan tempted Jesus and he will not spare you! Let's not be deceived; don't give Satan the opportunity to lure you away from the One who loves and cares for you. God's way is THE way and His way leads to truth and happiness.
"God's Word will keep you from sin, or sin will keep you from God's Word." I know that there are many circumstances today that justify the wife working either part-time or full-time outside of the home. I am not condemning anyone, that's not my place. I can identify with both worlds; I've worked part-time as well as full-time in times past, and I cannot praise and thank my heavenly Father enough for granting my desire to be home with my children, ministering to them. For me, it was a very difficult position to be in, but God in His mercy honored my heart's desire. Whatever situation you're in, I encourage you to trust the Lord for the outcome. He knows all about you and your family. If you desire to be obedient to the Lord, He will always show you the right path to take.
I must say that I sincerely, whole-heartedly agree with Mrs. Peace's statement on page 73. Let me share her thought's with you:
"If a wife is working or is thinking of returning to work, she should examine her motives. What is it she really wants? What is her heart set on? Is it to avoid becoming a "non-person?" Is it more material things? Is it wanting to be out from under the demands of child care?(wanting to leave the taking care of her own children with someone else). Is it to relieve her husband from his responsibility to work? None of these motives are for the glory of God. They are self-serving and sinful. Godly motives would be "learning to be content" (Philippians 4:11), "gratitude to the Lord for what she does have" (I Thessalonians 5:18), and "whatever you do in thought, word, and deed, do all for the glory of God" (I Corinthians 10:31). Staying at home and organizing a clean , well run household is a MAJOR BIBLICAL emphasis in the God-given ministry of the wife."
Summary: The wife is responsible to be a "worker at home" and to keep her home maintained/organized, so that she will be free to minister to the needs of her family--her husband/children. The wife does set the tone! It's her duty to "stay on top of things", so that she can begin building lasting relationships with the precious gifts that God has entrusted to her; her husband/children.
Set your heart on glorifying the Lord, being obedient to Him. Ask Him to help you decide how you can grow and develop Christ-like qualities that will help you be a "keeper of your home."
Scripture Motivator for the Week:
Colossians 3:23-24; "And whatever you do, do it heartily, as to the Lord and not to men,knowing that from the Lord you will receive the reward of the inheritance; for you serve the Lord Christ."
Next week, we will examine the characteristics of two life-styles; A lazy wife and a self-disciplined wife. We will also look at the importance of the wife creating a godly atmosphere in the home.
Taken from The Excellent Wife, by Martha Peace. Copyright 1999, Focus Publishing, Bemidji, MN. Used with permission for the purpose of this devotional series only. May not be reproduced or forwarded without express consent of the publisher.