The Excellent Wife

Lesson 22 "Home - The Wife's Domain"

Part Three: A Worker at Home

The following is a summary adaptation of material from "The Excellent Wife" by Martha Peace. Used by permission.

Last week we learned that being a "worker" means that I, as the wife, take on the role of caring for the needs of those in my home. In order to accomplish this, I must make a conscience effort to put off the old unproductive habits, and to put on the new productive habits as taught from the Word of God. One of the main points that we discussed was that wife must be careful to be efficient in her tasks and not waste her time in an unproductive manner. Also, she mustn't be "lazy." A lazy wife was described as one who's not eager nor willing to work. Not willing to exert (apply) oneself. We also looked at some of the similarities of laziness such as being slothful, slack, negligent, apathetic (having a non-caring attitude), inactive, neglectful and full of procrastination.

Today we're going to study in detail the characteristics of a `LazyPerson/Wife' versus those of a `Self-Disciplined Person/Wife. On page75 Mrs.Peace shows us a list of those characteristics. What I really like about this list is that Mrs.Peace uses the book of Proverbs to enlighten our hearts. Let's examine the characteristics of the Lazy Person.

"How long will you lie down, O sluggard? When will you arise fromy our sleep? A little sleep, a little slumber, a little folding of the hands to rest; and your poverty will come in like a vagabond, and your need like an armed man." Proverbs 6:9-11

"But he who sleeps in harvest is a son who acts shamefully." Proverbs10:5b

"The slothful man roasteth not that which he took in hunting..." Proverbs 12:27a

"He also who is slack in his work is brother to him who destroys." Proverbs 18:9

"Laziness casts into a deep sleep, and an idle man will suffer hunger." Proverbs 19:15

"I passed by the field of the sluggard, and by the vineyard of the man lacking sense; and behold, it was completely overgrown with thistles, its surface was covered with nettles, and its stone wall was broken down. When I saw, I reflected upon it; I looked, and received instruction. "A little sleep, a little slumber, a little folding of the hands to rest," Then your poverty will come as a robber, and your want like an armed man."Proverbs 24:30-34

These are definitely some absorbing and truthful thoughts worth our consideration. Study the characteristics of a "lazy person/wife."This is what I noted from these passages of scripture concerning the Lazy Wife: She's a sluggard, has a passion for sleep, will become poor, she's overtaken by her own needs, slothful, full of shame and becomes a shame to others, consistently slack in her work, a destroyer of good things, lazy, idle, will suffer hunger, lacks good sense. This wife is a great burden to her family! Eventually, her home life will become a reflection of her laziness.(see Proverbs 24:30-34). Now, let's examine the characteristics of a Self-Disciplined Person:

"Go to the ant, O sluggard, observe her ways and be wise, which, having no chief, officer or ruler, prepares her food in the summer,and gathers her provision in the harvest." Proverbs 6: 6-8

"He who gathers in summer is a son who acts wisely...but the precious possession of a man is diligence." Proverbs 12:27

"The ants are not a strong folk, but they prepare their food in the summer." Proverbs 30:25

"She arises while it is still night, and gives food to her household, and portions to her maidens." Proverbs 31:15

"She looks well to the ways of her household, and does not eat the bread of idleness." Proverbs 31:27

This is what I noted from these passages of scripture concerning the Self-Disciplined Wife: she is a preparer, she acts wisely, she's sensible, clever and skillful, she makes use of her time and is never idle (rising earlier than usual, if necessary to run a smooth and efficient home), she's unselfish, she's a giver, she's aware of her family's needs. This wife is a great blessing to her family . She looks well to the ways of her household. (See Proverbs 31:27). I encourage each of us to study carefully and open-minded the character traits in both examples. I pray that if you are convicted by the Lord in any area, that you will have a humble heart and go to the Lord in prayer.

God convicts us of sin because He loves us. He wants to bring us to the place where He desires us to be. Hebrews 12:6 and 11 come to my mind as I think about the chastening/discipline of the Lord:

Hebrews 12:6, 11 says "For whom the Lord loveth he chasteneth, and scourgeth every son whom he receiveth...Now no chastening for the present seemeth to be joyous, but grievous: nevertheless afterward it yieldeth the peaceable fruit of righteousness unto them which are exercised thereby."

With the help of the Lord you can become the self-disciplined wife that God desires you to become. When looking at this lesson, I find that it's easy to feel discouraged. However, we know that this is not the intent. The intent is to get us to move into a right relationship with the Lord. The Lord wants to conform us to the image of His Son, Jesus Christ. This is the reason why we live. So that we can live our lives unto Him. We must always be mindful to view ourselves in light of God's Word. God's standard must never be substituted for our own self-designed standards. However, the wife must find a balance in her work. Her duties must never take the place of her affection to her husband/children. It is a sin to put more importance on the cleanliness of the home and the care of things than on the people who God has entrusted to you. A wife who has her heart "set on" having a perfect house probably has an idol in her heart. Being a perfectionist makes everyone miserable. We must come to grips that things will not always be perfect! You must be careful not to create a home where your family feels unimportant. A home should be a home of love, where everyone is comfortable to be there. It should be a "haven of rest" from the cares and concerns of the world. As you seek the Lord for ways to be creative and useful, He will guide you in your day. When you feel overwhelmed, you must stop, and go to Him in prayer. He'll give you that little refreshment of His Spirit to help you accomplish your tasks. God takes delight in helping you! Tell Him how you're feeling and be reminded of His faithfulness in the past as you seek His help. Then you'll be able to refocus on the Lord's plan for you in all that you do.

More than anything, I pray that you will not be discouraged from this lesson, but rather encouraged in your spirit, that the Lord is more than willing and He's able to assist you moment by moment. He is concerned about all that concerns you.I will close with these thoughts from Mrs. Peace. On page 76 she says,

"If you are intent on keeping the perfect house or you are lazy and not fulfilling your responsibilities at home, you are sinning. Confess that sin to God and to your family. Ask their forgiveness. Begin to do all your work as "unto the Lord." The world makes fun of the "June Cleavers," that devoted television wife and mother from the 1950's. The world is deceived. You can by God's grace, begin today to be the excellent wife in Proverbs 31:27 as you "look well to the ways of your household and do not eat the bread of idleness."

Set your heart on glorifying the Lord. Next week, we will continue with part four of "Home - The Wife's Domain." In that lesson we will be discussing how the wife can begin to create a Godly Atmosphere in the Home. We will see how often it is the wife/mother who "sets the tone" in the home. I am excited because this lesson deals with our attitudes concerning the work/tasks that we have to perform. How we do them really says a lot about us and our relationship with the Lord. We will see the importance of allowing God's joy to permeate our being so that our family will be drawn to that same joy and love in Christ.

"Wherefore seeing we also are compassed about with so great a cloud of witnesses, let us lay aside every weight, and the sin which doth so easily beset us, and let us run with patience the race that is set before us, looking unto Jesus the author and finisher of our faith; who for the joy that was set before Him endured the cross, despising the shame,and is set down at the right hand of the throne of God." Hebrews 12:1-2

Taken from "The Excellent Wife" by Martha Peace, pp 75-76. Copyright 1999, Focus Publishing, Bemidji, Minnesota. Used with permission for the purposes of this devotional series only. May not be reproduced or forwarded without the express consent of the publisher.