The Excellent Wife

Lesson 33
"Love - The Wife's Choice."
Principal #5 - The Wife is to "Put on Love"


The following is a summary adaptation of material from "The Excellent Wife" 
by Martha Peace. Used by permission. Taken from "The Excellent Wife" by 
Martha Peace, pp 99-105. Copyright 1999, Focus Publishing, Bemidji, 
Minnesota. Used with permission for the purposes of this devotional series 
only. May not be reproduced or forwarded without the express consent of the 
publisher.


This lesson begins with one of my favorite scriptures for dealing with "heart 
attitudes" & "character adjustments."

Colossians 3:12-14:

"And so those who have been chosen of God, holy and beloved, put on a heart 
of compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience; bearing with one 
another, and forgiving each other, whoever has a complaint against anyone; 
just as the Lord forgave you, so also should you. and beyond all these things 
put on love, which is the perfect bond of unity."


Throughout the scripture we as believers are taught "to love."  We are never 
given a choice-We are commanded to love as Christ loves/loved us.  We have 
been given a direct command from God, yet many of us choose not to obey.  
When we don't obey the Lord's instruction, we are sinning.  It also shows 
where your trust lies-in yourself.

God is love and you cannot openly, and without constraint love the 
'unlovable' without His help.  He will give you the much needed grace to 
overcome evil by doing good.  III John 1:11 says:

"Beloved, follow not that which is evil, but that which is good.  He that 
doeth good is of God: but he that doeth evil hath not seen God."

We are told 'repeatedly' in Scripture to "pursue love" and to "walk in love." 
 Let's clarify the words "pursue" and "walk."


-To pursue means to seek; To follow after.  To continue or persevere.
"How then do we 'follow after' love?"  By going to the Scriptures, looking to 
the many examples of Christ and God's love.

-To walk is to follow a certain course.
"Which course are we to follow?"  The one that Christ Jesus walked Himself.  
I have referred to this scripture several times in our previous lessons; I 
John 2:5-6:

"But whoso keepeth his word, in him verily is the love of God perfected: 
hereby know we that we are in him.  He that saith he abideth in him ought 
himself also so to walk, even as he walked."

What a powerful Word!  After I had read this passage a while back, the Lord 
truly got my attention.  I could no longer make excuses to God for my lack of 
expressing genuine, unconditional love, like that of Christ, to my husband.  
I could no longer make excuses or shift the blame for my own sin.  I had to 
confess my sin, acknowledge my wrong doing, and receive the forgiveness of 
God.  As I read this passage daily, the Lord used His Word mightily to 
transform my actions into those that are pleasing to Him.  I did not 
experience 'real change' until I surrendered my life to Him to be not only my 
Savior, but my Lord.  God's Word has the power to transform any life.

How can we say that God abides in us and the very character of Him is absent 
from our life?  God is love.  If He abides in your heart, love is a part of 
who He is.  We as Christians cannot pick and choose the qualities that we 
want to posses.  As you surrender your complete being, including your way of 
thinking and doing to the Lord's control, He will perfect and make complete 
His love in you.  The 'new man' is Christ 'formed' in the believer. God's 
love is made complete in you as you obey His commandment to love. As you hear 
the Word of God you are required to respond.  James 4:17 says:

"Therefore to him that knoweth to do good, and doeth it not, to him it is 
SIN." 

Let's willingly obey the Lord.  Stop fighting His plan for your life and walk 
in the freedom of obeying Him.  His commandments are not burdensome-we make 
our way a struggle by choosing not to walk in the path of righteousness 
prepared for us by the Lord.  Well, we have no more excuses!  On page 104 
Mrs. Peace has this to say regarding "Putting on Love:"

"Putting on love begins with biblical thoughts and motives then progresses to 
your actions.  Feeling love and warmth towards your husband begins only after 
you have been thinking and doing the loving actions for a while.  Carefully 
consider the following examples of loving thoughts.


-1. "He may not be in a good mood, but I am not going to avoid him because 
'love is not rude.'"  
I Cor. 13:5


-2. "I can show love to him by listening in a patient manner because 'love is 
patient.'"  
I Cor. 13:4


-3. "Every day that I righteously endure this difficult time, I am showing 
love to my husband because 'love endures all things.'"   
I Cor. 13:7


-4.  " I am not going to keep thinking about what he did because 'love does 
not take into account a wrong suffered.'"   
I Cor. 13:5


-5. "Since I can't prove otherwise, I am going to show love to him by 
'believing the best.'"  
I Cor. 13:4-5


-6. "I am going to show love to my husband by being glad for him that he is 
going fishing because 'love is not jealous' and 'love does not seek its own 
[way]..."
I Cor. 13:4-5

"What you think whether good or bad, influences your actions."

It is clear that we must purpose in our heart to do good. God will give you 
the needed guidance & strength to do so.  You must work at it diligently with 
an intent to overcome evil w/good.

While I sit here writing this thought came to mind: I am alarmed how we as 
women go to great lengths to shed excess pounds, and practice good eating 
habits in order to maintain good health.  Through the pain & sacrifice, we 
forge on!  At the same time, when it comes to spiritual growth, and 
strengthening our relationships with our husband, we give up at the first 
sign of difficulty.  We don't spend half as much time shedding the 'old man' 
and his sinful practices as we do on shedding those unwanted pounds.  Nor do 
we spend half the time searching God's Word, learning His Word, practicing 
how to walk in righteousness by putting on the 'new man,' as we do putting on 
a new figure.  "Do you see the picture?"  These things ought not to be so 
among God's people.  The question each of us must ask ourselves is this: "As 
a Christian woman/wife/mother, where do my priorities lie?, What really is 
important to me?"  Think about it.

Putting on love does not happen over night.  It does not happen automatically 
either.  If you truly desire to "put on love" and obey the Lord's command to 
love, you must memorize and meditate on God's Word DAILY.  It must become a 
part of you.  One passage of scripture that will assist you in loving as God 
loves, is I Corinthians 13:4-7.  This is a wonderful expression of God's idea 
of love.  When I began studying and looking at this chapter on love, I had no 
clue of what real love was.  I struggled with the concept so much so that I 
had to cry out to the Lord to help me.  I asked Him to saturate my heart with 
His love.  To rid me of all the false images and concepts of love that I had 
learned outside of His will.  The Lord had a great work to do in me.  I do 
praise and thank Him for showing me how to love and creating in me the 
capacity to love as He has. Now, it is not difficult nor strange to me to 
read this passage of scripture.  It is truly a character that I desire the 
Lord to develop in me.  I desire greatly to walk as He walked.  With all my 
heart and soul, my greatest desire is to please the Lord in all of my ways.  
If you have the desire to obey, the Lord will grant you the desire of your 
heart.  When our desires line up with His will, He will always grant them. 
The problem many times, lies with us, when our desires are contrary to God's 
plan for our lives.  


I pray that you will memorize I Cor. 13:4-7 this week, and ponder it day by 
day, sleeping on it, going over and over it in your mind, allowing it to 
become a part of your being.  Saturate your mind with the Word of God.  You 
will never be led astray.  I pray also that the Lord shower you with His love 
and that you allow His love to freely flow to your husband.  Yes, it may be 
difficult-God never said it would not be, but you can endure because He has 
promised to never leave you nor to forsake you.  God always gives us his 
grace to make it through and through.  You may not 'enjoy' the trial you're 
in but God is faithful-all the time.  You will make it and come forth 
victoriously with the Lord.

It's your duty to "Put On Love."


Scripture Truths:
- Psalm 37:8
Cease from anger, and forsake wrath: fret not thyself in any wise to do evil.

-I Peter 3:17
For it is better, if the will of God be so, that ye suffer for well doing, 
than for evil doing.

-I Peter 4:19
Wherefore let them that suffer according to the will of God commit the 
keeping of their souls to him in well doing, as unto a faithful Creator.


Next week, we will look in depth at I Corinthians 13 and discuss the 13 
characteristics of "Putting on Love."



In Christ's love,
Pamm


Create in me a clean heart, O God, and renew a right spirit within me.
Psalm 51:10

Give me a pure heart-that I may see Thee.
A humble heart-that I may hear Thee,
A heart of love-that I may serve Thee,
A heart of faith-that I may abide in Thee.

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