Lesson 43
Chapter Thirteen: "Biblical Submission-Basis Of The Wife's
Protection"
Principle #5: A Wise Wife Will Seek Training And Counsel On
Submission From A Godly Older Woman.
The following
is a summary adaptation of material from "The Excellent
Wife"
by Martha Peace. Taken from "The Excellent Wife" by
Martha Peace, pp.
150-154. Copyright,
1999, Focus, Publishing, Bemidji, Minnesota. Used with permission
for the
purposes of this devotional series only. May not be reproduced or
forwarded
without the express consent of the publisher.
This is our last lesson dealing with the subject of Biblical
Submission. We
have covered a lot of ground and I pray that this will not be
end, but the
beginning of your search to honor the Lord and your husband in
coming under
his authority. As I truly learned, submission is an act of
obedience to God
and demonstrates fully to those around, that your life has been
entrusted to
His care. Submission is more than just being under the authority
of our
husbands, it portrays a picture of the harmony of God the Father,
God the
Son, and God the Holy Spirit. Contrary to what the world may
think, biblical
submission brings freedom--freedom to do God's Will, fully
trusting that He
is a rewarder of them that diligently seek Him.
In this weeks lesson we are going to look at Principal #5:
"A Wise Wife Will Seek Training And Counsel On Submission
From A Godly Older Woman."
I cannot say enough about this principal. I encourage each of you
to
sincerely pray and ask God to lead you to someone who is
spiritually minded,
who loves the Lord and who seeks to grow in Him. This person will
be able to
listen to you, help you remain focused on your goals in Christ,
encourage you
to continue with the Lord and seek His Will, and model before you
what it
means day-by-day to be a godly woman. The Lord instructs us to do
so in His
Word:
Older women likewise are to be reverent in their behavior, not
malicious
gossips, nor enslaved to much wine, teaching what is good, that
they may
encourage the younger women to love their husbands...being
subject to their
own husbands, that the Word of God may not be dishonored. Titus
2:3-5
The best way to find someone who you can be accountable to in
this way would
be through your church. Your pastor might be able to assist you
or even
someone who is in church leadership. You want to make sure that
this woman
is doctrinally sound and stands firm on the Word and principles
of God. Many
times we allow a sister who is stronger in Christ to intimidate
us. We may
see her as someone who has done no wrong. This shouldn't be the
case. We
should see her as someone who has grown in Christ that can help
us in our
walk with God. Her role is to disciple you not to intimidate you.
This is a wonderful opportunity to grow in the Lord alongside
someone who is
committed to Christ. You have the chance to see/hear firsthand
how this
sister dealt with her trials in a godly, biblical way. It gives
much
encouragement to a woman who is struggling with making right
choices, to see
that she can make it with Christ. We need to be led by those who
are walking
with Christ, who desire to please God, and who share in our love
for Christ.
That's why it is so crucial for us to not seek counsel outside of
God's
people. The world has answers that are contrary to the Bible.
They do not
regard God's Word as important nor necessary. We must stay away
from worldly
philosophies, mysticism, wrong doctrinal views and the like, that
would seek
to turn us away from God and our husbands.
In the area of biblical submission, ask yourself this question:
"Am I being
joyfully obedient? How pleasing am I to God and my husband in
this area?" As
you consider the these questions, take a few moments to read over
the list of
ways that wives are "NOT" submissive. Check those which
apply to you and ask
the Lord to help you surrender any known sin so that you can
begin to honor
Him and your husband.
"Specific Ways Wives Are Not Submissive:
(These are typical ways that a wife acts in being unsubmissive
towards her
husband.)
1. She does things that are annoying or vexing to her husband.
It is better to live in a desert land, that with a contentious
and vexing
woman. Proverbs 21:19
Note: a woman who is vexing is "irritating, annoying,
puzzling, baffling,
bothersome and will debate at length."
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2. She does not discipline the children as she should (even after
her
husband asks her to).
The rod and reproof give wisdom, but a child who gets his own way
brings
shame to his mother. Proverbs 29:15
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3. She is more loyal to others than to her husband.
The heart of her husband trusts in her, he will have no lack of
gain.
Provers 31:11
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4. She argues or pouts or gives him the cold shoulder when she
does not get
her own way.
It is better to live in a corner of a roof, than in a house
shared with a
contentious woman. Proverbs 21:9
--------
5. She does not stay within the limits of their budget.
House and wealth are an inheritance from fathers, but a prudent
wife is from
the Lord. Proverbs 19:14
--------
6. She corrects, interrupts, talks for her husband, and is too
outspoken
when others are around.
A constant dripping on a day of steady rain and a contentious
woman are
alike; He who restrains her restrains the wind, and grasps oil
with his right
hand.
Proverbs 27:15,16
--------
7. She manipulates him to get her own way. She may manipulate by
deceit,
tears, begging, nagging, complaining, anger, or intimidation.
Martha tried
to manipulate Jesus when she said:
...Lord, do you care that my sister has left me to do all the
serving alone?
Then tell her to help me:
Luke 10:40
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8. She makes important decisions without consulting him.
But I want you to understand that Christ is the head of every
man, and the
man is the head of a woman, and God is the head of Christ. I
Corinthians 11:3
Note: Occasionally, a husband will instruct his wife that in
certain areas
she is to make the decisions. In those cases, when authority is
delegated to
her she then has freedom to choose. Otherwise, he should be
consulted in all
matters (that are important to him) and should submit to his
headship.
---------
9. She directly defies his wishes.
For rebellion is as the sin of divination, and insubordination is
as iniquity
and idolatry.
I Samuel 15:23
---------
10. She worries about the decisions he makes and takes matters
into her own
hands.
Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and
supplication, with
thanksgiving let your requests be make known to God. And the
peace of God,
which surpasses all comprehension, shall guard your hearts and
your minds in
Christ Jesus. Philippians 4:7,8
---------
11. She does not pay attention to what he says.
But let everyone be quick to hear, slow to speak and slow to
anger... James
1:19
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On page 153, Mrs. Peace has this to say about biblical
submission:
In summary, submission is a way of rightly responding to another
person. A
wife can respond with tenderness and gentleness or she can
respond with
harshness and irritation. Submission is the way that all
Christians should
respond to God and the way the wife should respond to her
husband. In the
areas where you know you have failed, you should take a few
minutes and
confess your sins to the Lord (I John 1:9). Then go to your
husband and ask
his forgiveness. It may be best for you to be specific and give
examples.
Your attitude should be humble, focusing at this time on what you
have done
wrong. You can begin today to be a gentle, godly, submissive wife
to your
husband. It is the heart of God for you."
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Biblical Insight:
1. What area is the Lord surfacing in your heart that you need to
surrender?
2. How does biblical submission provide protection for the wife?
Give
scriptures to support your evidence.
3. In what way(s) have you been unsubmissive to your own husband?
List some
ways that you will use God Word's to help you respond in a godly
manner.
4. What insights have you gained from this lesson on Biblical
Submission
that you can share with another sister to help her to grow in
Christ?
5. What is keeping you from applying God's truth to your marriage
in the way
that you respond to your husband in submission? What scriptures
can you
memorize to help you obey the Lord?