Craigyhill, the worlds best kept secret. An abundance of first class
facilities await the intrepid traveller in this fairytale mountain resort.
Restaurants and bars (Tech Old Boys club and the chip shops) are ready to
serve some of the finest cuisine and drinks on the planet. Amiable
propieters, such as Sir Ian Lough ensure that the latest goods are available
from around the world at knock down prices. Beautiful murals adorn the
three shopping complexes with such time honoured gems as "Gordy is a homo"
and "Rangers FC Rule). Some illinformed travellers may mistake the red, white and blue colour scheme as an indication of extreme loyalist tendancies held by some of these simple hill folk, but no, the tricolouring of the shops and kerbstones in the estate is in honour of the great french explorer Jaques deStewartie who came to the estate in 1629 trading with the locals from cart which he drove around the streets selling single packets of snuff. In fact deStewartie finally settled on the hill in parkland behind the the shops, an area that he loved because of its exceptionally clean and fragrant air. "Belle air!!!" he cried when he first discovered this place of wonder and that rapturous exclamation lives on in the modern name of Bellair Park.
Perfect roads and adequate parking ensure that this golden sunsetted garden
of eden caters to the ever growing number of high rolling adventurers.
Some prefer to visit Craigyhill in a pilgrimage to one of the four churches
in the resort but please be advised that any Romans may have to contend with
burnt out debris at their place of worship if the mayor has been in one of
his high spirited torch assemblies. To add some balance it must be said that many of the estates walls are emblazoned with acronyms advocating that one should make love to the Holy Father.
Despite it's giddy altitude and steep slopes Craigyhill has little to offer the international skiing jetset, due to the areas balmy climate. But, a plethora of other exciting "radical" sports are well catered for. Sure, skiing in the french alps is exciting but it's nothing compared to the sheer adrennalin rush induced by riding a Raliegh Chopper down "the Brusties" or jumping from one coalshed roof to another around "the backs" of Dromaine Drive. Hang ten to the max Dude!!!!!
If more traditional sports are your thing then how about leisurely game of soccer on the fine pitch situated in the grouns of the Linn Primary School. The estates recreation councilor, Click Clarke, will gladly show you the location of the bent bars in the fence whereby you can access the pitch. If your lucky you could find yourself involved in a cross estate obstacle race when the jolly local constables arrive during your soccer match.