Addie Lee Wall Blue was born in Pinehurst. NC in 1929 to Maggie and Wiley Wall. She departed this life on September 28, 1998. She was the youngest of three children. She was preceded in death by her sister, Lucille Wall Nicholson and her brother Willie G. (Archie) Wall. Addie attended The Academy Heights High School and graduated in 1948. She worked in New York following her school years and traveled to London for a year, where she worked for a private family in the coastal town of Ipswich,England. Shortly thereafter, she returned to New York and lived with an Aunt in Rockville Center Long Island.
A few years later, probably 1953 or 1954, she returned to Pinehurst where we met and eventually married in 1957. Ours was a long courtship and one that evolved over time since we both had just emerged from broken relationships. I am not sure we ever thought of the possibility of marriage, at least not in the beginning. We were both dating other people for a while even as we continued to see each other. As our relationship grew, we moved further from the other people and became closer to each other.
Addie was doing domestic work as a maid/cook for a wealthy family and I was working at a local hotel doing odd jobs in the dining room where eventually I became a waiter. Our combined incomes were much below the poverty level, but we had good times together in the few hours that were available to us following some long work days. Most "domestic" and hotel workers had little time off during the "Social Season" which began in the month of September and ran into May. Domestics had an occasional half- day, twice weekly, usually on Thursday and Sunday afternoons.Our social life centered around going out to local "night spots" in a nearby community with another couple, Charles and Peggy Barrett. Charles was a cook at the hotel where I worked and Peg was a nurse at the Moore County Hospital. We made Sunday evening our special time together. High times for us were catching one of the touring artists who were on the road tours through the area. Many of them made it big later. ie, Fats Domino, Ray Charles, B.B. King, Bobby Blue Bland. Little Willie John, Clyde Mcphatter, ChucK Berry, Lil Richard. And, occasionally when we could get off, we might sit outside the Carolina Hotel, ( being Negroes, we were not allowed to go inside) and listen to The Glen Miller Orchestra, Tex Benneke was the leader then. Other big Bands, such as, and the Dorsey's - Jimmy and Tommy- also played the Carolina Ballroom occasionally. Charles and Peg married, they remain our friends to this day and still live in the Southern pines area. For Negroes, as we were known then, there were social affairs such as house parties or "hanging out" at Jake's, Lacy's and the Ambassadors' Club. There were the Teachers' dances also which capped the end of the school year in the Spring. Tickets were at a premium ; you had to know somebody to acquire tickets to the "Master's Dance."
I was attracted to Addie when she first returned to Pinehurst because she wore a tam which complemented her oval face. Then too, it did not hurt that she had "legs" and was "stacked" as the terms were then. The way she walked and dressed gave the impression that she was somebody and she knew it. Indeed. she was. The overall effect was eye-catching and rather stunning, she "turned a lot of heads". My former relationship and the pain associated with it began to fade very rapidly. It became harder to remember what I was in pain about.
Addie adored clothes and loved to shop for herself and others. She was generous almost to a fault, often buying, not one dress but two or three. And, at times, multiple shoe purchases were made as well. She was a smart shopper, but volume buying did not mean cheaper choices. She bought the "good stuff". She had no one to support but herself, therefore, spending three months salary at a time was not uncommon. The bills came pretty regularly but they got paid and then she would be off on the next spree. On the other hand, she had the restraint, then, to exercise her great love of shopping by going to the shopping centers as far away as Greensboro, NC (more than one hour's drive) and spending the whole day and not buying one item. That was particularly true when the card was maxed out. She enjoyed looking and I think, planning the next purchases. Later, after we married, I often wondered where that restraint went. She still had her moments of restraint but not as often. She took out the "stops" as our income increased. Her nieces and nephews, the beneficiaries of her favorite pastime, loved "Aunt Lee's" generosity.
This is probably a bit ahead of the story, but Addie and I always had a joint bank account, so we both always knew what was to be paid and what we could spend. In the main, however, she did not want to be bothered about knowing what was in the bank, she would simply say I am going to look for a particular item and then go get it. She never exceeded what was reasonable for that month and we never had an argument about money for the 44 year of courtship and marriage. Certainly, we argued about a lot of things, but never money. Somehow, I believe it was because we always took care of the ongoing bills first, put a portion away for emergencies and gave to our church and to charities. We always believed that God saw to it that we had what we needed. You really can't out give God. Back to the story.
Addie, all her life, but particularly in her early years, was very outspoken. She mellowed as we both matured. She would not "suffer fools", as the saying goes. Her language was often pointed and "flavored" with just the right "spice" to leave no doubt as to her feelings or position on a given subject. It was a sore point with me for a long time and we discussed ways to tone down the fire. And, as stated, time and maturity helped to mellow the language but not her straight forward targeting of the source of the problem. She spoke her mind. Most people came to expect it and delighted in her honest opinion or assessment. I became accustomed to it as well and knew how to "push her buttons" when I wanted a good laugh. One such occasion would be when I would come home late from work and she would ask "where were you? I would answer, "out with Shirley". (Shirley was my mythical girlfriend, I will tell you about her later) To all who heard the exchange, it was readily apparent as to what she thought of Shirley and me, where we could go and what we could do when we got there.
One of the attributes Addie had that became well known among family and friends was her culinary skills; the woman could cook! Back then, before we married, I could look forward to some outstanding meals on Sundays in Taylortown. She could "smoke" and "burn" in the kitchen with the best of them. She used recipes but we could not ever get the dish to come out like hers even when she directed the mixture. Through the years, her cooking seemed to get even better. Her "soul food" dinners, and desserts at Homecoming, during the footbal season, were the main attractions of our fiends. At church dinners, where covered dishes were the on the menu, Addie Blue's dishes quickly disappeared. Where's Addie's potato pie? Is this Addie's fried chicken? Latecomers were often disappointed. On one occasion, a lady was so disappointed that she had missed one of Addie's dishes, that she asked Addie to bake one just for her. Addie did so, allowed no one else a portion and made me deliver it. .
As our relationship matured, we began to grow deeper in love and committed ourselves to each other. By this time the old relationships had faded completely. We were married February 16, 1957 and realized that we did not bring in enough money to have a family. In fact, we hardly had enough money to marry. We had twenty-eight dollars between us after paying the preacher. Our honeymoon was spent in Concord, NC in the home of a friend who was teaching at Academy Heights High School and rooming with Addie's sister in Pinehurst. A full refrigerator was provided by the "kind teacher", otherwise we would not have eaten very much. During the three days there, we attended a movie one night, I think, walked the streets of the little town window shopping on the next day and then went back to Pinehurst on Sunday to prepare for work on Monday. I had most of the twenty- eight dollars, except for the cost of the movie, still in my pocket.
Our educational levels did not extend beyond high school. We had no house, no money in the bank, no car, nothing but each other. We moved in with Addie's father for a few months then later took over her sister Lucille's house when she and her family relocated to Long Island. It was then that we made a decision that I should return to school. Addie, when offered the same opportunity, said "no thank you". I had previously attended Johnson C. Smith University in 1949, but dropped out. Disappointed at failing to make the basketball team I left without one credit earned. Therefore, it meant that at 26 years old I was to become a Freshman again. I was scared, due in part, to my previous failure and my advanced age. Nevertheless, with Addie's financial assistance and that of my mom, and sisters, I enrolled at The Agricultural and Technical College, Greensboro, NC, in September of 1957. I would be remiss not to mention that there were so many others in the community who assisted us during those difficult years. The gifts of food, money, words of encouragement and prayers were very instrumental in our success not only while I was in school but through out our marriage.
For six years we had a "commuter marriage" That is, I did the commute from Greensboro, Chapel Hill and Durham, Addie continued to do domestic work and paid what bills she could. She did not make much money but she made it go a long way. The shopping continued but at a much slower pace; there was more looking than buying since my expenses took most of her income. She did not complain. Whatever I needed for school came first. Somehow we made it week- by- week. I usually drove in on Friday evenings and found what work I could on Saturdays, often caddying at the country club. Sunday, Addie's day off, we spent with friends sharing their dinners and their hospitality. After dinner, for a few hours before my having to return to school or work, Addie and our good friend" Mama Toss,"( Florence Staton,a colorful woman, worthy of a story of her own) picked up their knitting needles, and we all moved out onto Mama Toss' screened- in porch. to relax. To the rapid chatter of their "flying needles", we talked about people, family, friends, and people in general. A lot of "flesh" was put on many dusty, old skeletons hidden in family closets (other people's, not ours) during these sessions. A lot of secrets were revealed under the protective disclaimers, "you didn't hear this from me". "Hear what?" was the stimulus to keep the flow going. It usually ended with tea and some kind of pie. Then it would be time to go. On my way out of town, I would drop both of them off at their respective jobs and bid them good bye for another week. Mama Toss was our dearest friend. She meant so much to us in our early days while Addie and I were courting and she continued to give her gifts of love and financial support to us through the college years. She continued to be close to us after being confined to a home in Durham where we visited her fairly regularly. She passed at 94 young years, still smoking long black cheroot cigarettes, "speaking her mind" and enjoying her life.
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After five years of school and one year teaching in Greensboro, we moved into a furnished apartment on Fayetteville Street in Durham. It was our first time setting up housekeeping on our own. Addie found several jobs, one at Butner working with a group of underprivileged youth. Following that, she worked at the North Carolina College Cafeteria and finally at Lincoln Community Health Center where she retired after about 25 years service
In Durham, the years moved swiftly. In 1964 we adopted a beautiful little girl 6 weeks old and named her Regina Miriam. It was a happy day. Regina (Gina) and husband, Joseph Soloman, have two beautiful children Joseph 111 and Christen Liana. In 1969, we adopted a handsome boy child, seven weeks old and named him James 111 (Jamie). Both Gina and Jamie completed their College educations, Gina with a BS and MS In English (UNC & NCCU) and James with a BS degree (Princeton Univ).
Both are featured elsewhere in The Blue Home Pages.Our House became one of the places where a lot of College students came to eat and Addie fed them well. She loved to cook. Football Saturdays and holidays were special times when her culinary skills filled the house with good smells and a lot of people. It was these fun times that we often picked at Addie about her alias. She had been mistaken for someone named "Teasley" at a local store. A woman unknown to Addie walked up to her and said" Hello, Mrs. Teasley!". Then on another occasion, someone else called her "Maxine". The two names stuck and became her alias. Addie Blue aka " Maxine Teasley". She feigned anger when we playfully used the pseudonym, but she was a good sport and joined in the fun. She was always completely baffled as to why people confused her with two different persons. During these fun times, I would bring up Shirley, my mythical girlfriend. About Shirley:
Shirley came about during one of my fishing trips. My partner and I fished from a small boat and were catching a few small but edible (keepers) fish. A woman and two children were fishing from the shore and not having any luck at all. As we prepared to leave the lake, it was apparent that the small family was fishing for food and not sport as we were. We decide to give our catch to them and they were delighted. We learned that the mother's name was Shirley Lanier. So, every time I came in from fishing late and without fish or was out late, Addie would inquire as to my whereabouts. I would say " I was with Shirley". I would always be prepared to receive an explicit suggestion as to what I could do with Shirley or to duck a shoe which came my way . More often than not, someone would bring up Shirley just to hear Addie get started on me.
There were many such fun times through the years, but the one which was the most memorable was our remarriage. We discovered in 1992, thirty-five years after our first marriage, that we were not legally married. We discovered the problem when Addie sought to file for retirement at The Social Security Office, Because I was the major wage earner, we would need a copy of the marriage license and other documents to qualify Addie for a portion of my benefits. The other documents we had, but no Marriage License. We both remembered having had one but somehow it has gotten lost in our move.
After researching all documents in the Moore County Register of Deeds Office and in the records at the state level nothing could be found. People taunted us with comments like " you, an Elder in the church and you are living in sin", "shacking up, are you? ". Addie did not think it funny at all. When we went to the doctor's office to have a blood test, the receptionist, after hearing my reason for the blood test, broadcast the fact that we were not married to all in the waiting room . Addie was steamed, Everyone else laughed . Even when we went to the Durham County Register of Deeds to get the License. The secretary and the Register of Deeds herself refused to believe that there was not something in the records back in Moore County to prove that we were married. She phoned the office in Carthage and after an hour or more, conceded that we were not married. There was not even the application for the license. She granted us the application for the license. Finally, we were legally married. with Regina and Donald Baker as our witnesses. Needless to say, even though there was money now to afford it now, there was no honeymoon. This was a business transaction for Addie, nothing more, nothing less.
Another joy for me was knowing how much Addie loved me. She was never demonstrative and "touchie- feelie", but quietly we shared so may tender moments with each other. My first hospitalization almost caused her to have health problems. She would not leave my bedside for days. When the pain was so intense, she held me and prayed and complained to the doctors until the pain was brought under control. She ate and slept with me in the tiny room. She did not leave until one of the nurses took over, practically forced her out and assured her that she would take personal charge of me. After one days rest, she was back again intending to stay overnight. Since I had improved , we convinced her to establish a routine by which she could get the rest she needed and still oversee my care.
Addie was a caring person, she talked tough very often but inside she cared about people. She loved her work and took great pride in doing it well. She was a hard taskmaster but never demanding any more from anyone than she would not do herself. She was" hands-on" in anything that had to be done. Generous with her time and money to her church and family and speaking up for those who were less fortunate was her way of life. Her faith in God was evident most of her life but never so strong as it was when she became ill. She went to God and her days were filled with His Praise and her thankfullness for His blessings. "It is in His hands", she would say, "don't cry". The twenty-third Psalm was her favorite, "The Lord Is My Shepherd; I shall not Want"...
Her illness devastated all of us. She was active and enjoying our travels, delighting in being a grandmother and working in our church. For five or six years, we had been told by her doctors that Addie had Hepatitis C but no intervention was necessary. Six months, after considerable weight loss and many tests, she was diagnosed as having inoperable liver cancer. She underwent several unsuccessful treatments. Through it all, she never cried or felt sorry for herself. She was strong and she gave us strength. She told us to keep faith in God and not to worry about her.
This seems a very inadequate effort to tell the full story of such a good Christian woman, loving mother, faithful wife. adoring grandmother and good friend. There is so much left out that was Addie Blue. Until we can write the rest of the story, we must take comfort in what she left us. She left us all a legacy of love, a pattern for living an exemplorary Christian life and a treasury of cherished memories. She left me vivid reflections of those wonderful forty-four years of sharing each others love and pain and the joy of our children, grandchildren, extended family and friends. They keep me now and forever so close to her spirit. She is indeed, "in God's Hands". She fought the fight, she finished the race, she kept the Faith. Oh, how we love and miss you, Honey.