I find comfort and solace in these words. James 1:18 states: “Of His Own Will He Fathered us with the Word of Truth, that we would become a kind of firstfruits of His Creation.” Now, if He willfully created us for “His good pleasure” (Eph. 1:5), then He would be a cruel and heartless Father if He made it unattainable for us to understand and do what pleases Him. If He willingly gave His Only Begotten Son to save us from an eternity separated from His Presence, then we can rest assured that He would also give us the means whereby we can fully get to know Him.

These means? His Holy Spirit, to begin with, Who introduces us to the possibility that there is a God. When we can grasp that Truth, then He shows us the Way to that Truth, i.e. Jesus Christ, and Jesus is the Only Way. There is no other. No philosophy, creed or other path, no matter how lofty and noble they are, can lead us to Jesus Christ. This is the beginning of our awareness of Who He is, and Jesus leads us in a relationship that grows and strengthens daily, unless we are in a place that is stagnant and not conducive to growth.

When we accept the fact that Jesus is our only Hope of Salvation, then Jesus takes us to the Father. It’s not a complex process. Simple Faith is all it takes, if you can call Faith simple. While no philosophy, creed or other path can lead us to Jesus in the beginning of our walk with Him, sometimes it’s very easy to deviate from our course once we begin. When grand goals and noble ideas come into our hearts (usually introduced there by well-meaning Christians) it can be easy, as well as “convenient”, to pursue those thoughts. Today, in most churches of America, the main thrust is not “knowing Him” so much as “doing for Him”: Serving, singing, teaching, preaching, hurrying, and doing, doing, doing! Usually this is the building of someone else’s kingdom. All God desires of us is for us to “worship Him in spirit and in truth” (John 4:23,24).

I sat in a service several years ago, as an assistant pastor came up to give some announcements. A simple job, right? Well, here’s what he proceeded to do: He stood there, intimidating the congregation into attending a Saturday soul-winning campaign that he was heading. He all but said these words: If you weren’t there, you did not love God! He went on for almost five minutes with his manipulative talk, reproving those who dare not attend, smiling all the while. The head pastor never got up afterward to correct this man’s tactics, so these poor people were left with the impression (whether they realized it or not) that the assistant’s methods were acceptable.

Without any correction, this mindset took over in this body, for we all learn more by example than anything else. This church literally “crumbled from within” in the short span of two years. And what became of the assistant pastor who made those announcements that day? He actually took over the church when the head pastor retired. Imagine what that church was like for its final days. I never went to see firsthand, but I heard horror stories. So some teach, by default, that the more a person does for God, the more God “loves” that person. This idea is totally erroneous, leading down a path of endless works, the result being spiritual burnout and crippling frustration, not to mention the creation of an arrogant and self-righteous attitude that always seems to be hinting, if not outright declaring:

All of us have different encounters in our initial salvation experience, but it all comes down to this one Truth: Jesus is the Way and the Truth, and we can have no Eternal Life without His shed Blood applied to our miserable, lost and hopeless lives. No matter what our “initial experience” might have been, we all came “through Jesus Christ”, when we are “born again”. The church didn’t save us; our parents’ or grandparents’ salvation didn’t “overflow” onto us and save us; and our own moral goodness didn’t save us. The reality is: I was a sinner, incurably lost and destined for hell, but the Spirit of God breathed upon my dead heart and brought the very Life of God into me.

Let me be absolutely clear on this point...when I accepted Jesus Christ as my Savior, I was not perfect, and I may not have repented of every sin I had ever committed, but I was forgiven and on my way, beginning my walk in His Way. Day by day, week by week, here a little, there a little, I began to grasp first one truth, then another. And because of all the wonderful things He showed me in the beginning, and even now -- many years later -- I have great cause to worship, thank and praise Him. And...it is my duty to “know the Truth of knowing Him” so that I might truly worship Him the way the Father desires. Not the way that men demand or insist, and not by some “orderly prescribed manner” declared by those who may not really “know” Him very well at all.

What we hold as truly “dear and precious” has a lot to do with who we are (or become), with what we believe, and with how we live our lives. It’s odd how men determine the things that matter, or make a difference, or are important in life. But I must ask a question: What will matter when we stand before the Judgment Seat of Christ? On That Day, all our plans, our ideals, our wills and our ways will lay there before us -- either as a witness against us as wood, hay and stubble, or a testament to our ability to worship Him in Spirit and in Truth -- as gold, silver and precious stones (1st Corinthians 3:12-15). How embarrassing, to stand before the Lord, trying to explain why we chose “this way” or “that idea” in which to further His Kingdom! Imagine trying to explain how our choices included using soulish methods and carnal people in things that were never meant for the unclean or impure of heart. What do I mean by “soulish methods and carnal people”?

During the last 7 or 8 years at the church we attended (that was “home” for 13 years), we had our usual Easter/Christmas pageants, like most churches. And like many churches, our church “hired” singers and musicians from the professional world to “fill in” where our choir or orchestra was “weak”. Although they were lovely people and gifted musicians, most (in fact, probably all) were not Christians, and absolutely none were of the Zadok variety (if you are reading this from the Weekly Teaching for October 8th, 2000, you may need to read the three-part teaching on Zadok, which actually precedes this teaching...or go to Moving the Church from ‘A’ to ‘Z’, which is a one-part introductory teaching preceding Zadok).

Now, going back to the situation of hiring unsaved people to “fill in” for our choir or orchestra --- it was a case of being unequally yoked, but no one seemed to care. It bothered me greatly, but when I “asked” about this situation, I was basically told it was none of my business. Their excuse, in order to justify their actions was this: “Oh, but just think: We bring these ‘unsaved’ people into our church; then God gets to ‘minister’ to them.” It sounds good and honorable, but the truth was: They wanted the pageant and the performances to sound “so much better” than they knew it could with just the servants in the choir and orchestra that God had given the church. It “grieved me” so much that I “withdrew” from the choir and drama team the last few years we were there. Then 1983 came. Our last full year at the church that had been our home for so long.

Sixteen years after that period of awareness and awakening I’m still learning, still growing, still walking, still grasping. Does it get easier? Yes and no. “His Way is easy; His burden is light...”, but I find myself somewhat isolated. Over the years I have tried to share what I felt the Lord was showing me during that “time of learning”, but I have had very few ears and fewer hearts to hear. At times, even my own wife has found it very difficult to understand, because what ultimately happens is this: If I truly believe the Word of the Lord, then I have no choice but to be obedient. No choice whatsoever. That is the hard part, because for the better part of fifteen years now, that has meant to disagree and stand opposed to much of what is going on in the churches today.

You may ask, and you have every right to do so: “What right does he have to disagree with the leaders of the church?” You may say, “This guy sounds stubborn and petty.” You may even think, as others have (including what were once close friends), “This guy is deceived!” But before you judge what I am or what you think I am, allow me to share with you the less than two pages of scripture from Ezekiel, chapter forty-four. Yes, I know what some people think about plunging into the Old Testament: “We live in the New Testament, under Grace and freedom!” The trouble is, some of our so-called “freedoms” have robbed us of His intended Grace, and we ultimately have ended up in bondage, under the law, and as cursed as if we were not His sons and daughters.

Stand fast means to “persevere”, to persist, no matter what; hindered, in verse 7, means “to beat back” or “check”; bringing to an abrupt stop, restraining or controlling (something Abiathar does all too well). The sad part is most of us do not perceive when we are in this “entangled” state of affairs, caught up in the carnal crush of life. Why? Because we somehow believe we’re untouchable or immune; that somehow “entanglements” and “yokes of bondage” don’t apply to us. We think, “It’s not supposed to happen that way in the church! We all love God and are serving Him. We meet together several times a week and, besides, listen to our wonderful choir and singers!”

Yeah, well, therein lies the crux of the problem. It’s your choir; your singers; not His. I know this is a taboo subject, because we’re all so used to the tried and true measures of the church, but these measures are not True. Not according to His Truth. But please allow me to explain. Though it may take a while, and the journey may seem a bit circuitous, I will try and establish my point. For if my words are merely the rantings of a cynical and angry heart, then the Spirit of the Lord shall reveal that to those who read these words. However, if my words are true, He will show that, too.

The “casualty list” grew that first year, as I attended the innaugural class of Christ for the Nations Institute. There I saw more “militant people getting things done”. I also saw more bloodied and bruised bodies, of which I was one. I couldn’t understand what excuse or even what reasoning people could have for running roughshod over any of God’s people, especially since Jesus had said, in Matt. 18:6--“But whoever shall offend one of these little ones who believe in me, it would be better to have a millstone hung around his neck...”; and in Matt.25:40 -- “...Inasmuch as you have done it to one of the least of these my brethren, you have done it to me.”

These two verses are not just speaking of children, but also of those “young in the Lord”. I knew these words, and I believed I knew what they meant, but I was young in mind and new in the Spirit. What did I know? I had many questions, though, and they haunted me for many years. Things that I saw; things I heard. It seemed that God consistently placed me in situations where I would eventually find myself “caught in between”. In between the one group, which I could only describe as “Vigilante Christians” (where the end always justified the means), and the second group. These two groups, though, showed a clear sign of division within the Body of Christ.

The second group of Christians seemed content on just “being in His presence”. They didn’t need the forefront or the limelight, and were content to “linger in the tabernacle of the Lord”. They seemed more at peace, more at rest, more at one with the very Lord who had called them to be so. I humbly thank my Lord and Savior for having pulled my heart into this latter group of people. It did not make me a better person, nor a wiser one, but it was the genesis of where the Lord was leading me, where He would develop my heart and spirit into a position of maturity and “awareness”, as I choose to call it, culminating in 1983.

Many souls, families, relationships and churches suffered greatly under this mis-guided teaching. I am responsible for what I do, who I hurt, and the ramifications of both. I cringed while sitting under such teachings during the ’80s, although I was not certain why I felt so uncomfortable hearing the words back then. Now, today, looking back at what many people did under the guise of leadership, I can see the manipulative hand of carnal, soulish men. Domination, intimidation and manipulation are at the heart of the Abiathar minister; it is “who” Abiathar is. Abiathar has to control in order to get his way, but he is so good at it he can make us believe it is God’s Way. God does not “force” His Will or His Plan upon any of us. Why do we allow men to do so?

• Cain vs. Abel
• Lot vs. Abraham
• Ishmael vs. Isaac
• Esau vs. Jacob
• Eli vs. Samuel
• Saul vs. Samuel, and
• Saul vs. David
• All are the flesh vs. the Spirit

The flesh (Abiathar) is carnal and cunning and extremely self-serving and self-absorbed. Opposite of this is the mind of the Zadok minister, who is like John, the disciple, leaning on the breast of Jesus. All Zadok cares about is being with Him, knowing more of Him, doing His will, and doing all things for His glory. Abiathar doesn’t mind receiving glory for himself, though he will likely tell you that it is God’s glory. He may tell you of all the wonderful things God has done, but he will readily bask in the glow as praise and applause go forth. Like I said...Abiathar is cunning.

But, if you’ll recall, that was Lucifer’s mistake... basking in and enjoying the praises and the Glory that belonged only to the Lord God Almighty.

Once the pastor would ask us for help, we’d help out in these churches in any way we could, because we knew the Lord had sent us there to be a “help and an aid”. Sometimes we were there just to be a prayer support; other times we taught or preached or ministered in some other capacity such as leading in worship. But the “problem” usually arose after we had been there a while -- after we began seeing the domineering or manipulative hand of man moving in and among the congregation, and when this had been shown to us, we had no choice but to deal with it. We could not “wink at it” and pretend it wasn’t there. Sometimes I wished we could, but we could not. And when the time came to “confront” this issue, I usually went to the pastor by myself (at first), but I didn’t just go rushing wildly in with accusations and Godly jealousy. I always took my time, praying and seeking the wisdom of God, before I dared to say anything. What generally happened, though, was some great crisis would arise and there I would find myself... caught right in the middle... between the spirit of Abiathar and the Spirit of Zadok.

In the earlier days, when this sort of conflict arose, and I found myself “caught in the middle”, I could not clearly see and understand that it was God Who had orchestrated the entire situation. As time drew on, I began to see the Wisdom of His Ways. I became, as it were, a pawn (but a willing pawn -- let me make that very clear) in His dealings with harmful and disruptive conditions in His Body. He would “thrust me into the midst” of dilemmas into which I most certainly would not dare venture on my own.

For example: After a pastor of a church we were heavily involved in had asked me to, I went to see him about a certain serious and divisive problem in the church. Now, this was a pastor who had come to me and my wife, commenting on how he “perceived the Hand of God on our lives” -- and how he had observed us worshipping in a manner that was free and unrestrained. He had come to us, saying all of this, and he told us that this was the type of freedom of worship he wanted for his church, and “would we be willing to help him make it so?” We said yes, and what followed was months of beautiful, spiritual stirrings in that church. Not because of us, but because God had brought many people into that church, and He had decided to breath His Life upon us all. Wonderful things happened until the enemy (of course) could stand it no longer. What ensued was months of intense spiritual warfare, joined by many fleshly confrontations. The Word plainly teaches: “We wrestle not against flesh and blood”, but most of the people in that church did not know how to “wage” spiritual warfare. They thought they did and they claimed they did, but what followed was a bloody, senseless, losing battle of the flesh. And, sadly, I found myself right in the very middle of it all! I had not wanted to be there; I had not jockeyed myself into that position. It was the Lord Who had firmly and most assuredly placed me into the eye of a very serious spiritual hurricane.

I had known for some time that there was a confrontation coming, and I was dreading it. My wife and I had already been praying, and I readied myself the best I could, but nothing prepared me for what happened when I went into that pastor’s office to discuss the turmoil in his church. I never shall forget that day. I already had a very heavy heart, burdened for the things I saw and heard in that church, and I went into that pastor’s office thinking I would just share my concerns and try to help with some kind of a solution. But, instead, here’s what happened: Every time I attempted to open my mouth to speak, I wept. Not just simple tears streaming down my cheeks. I wept...loudly and uncontrollably. It was somewhat embarrassing, because I had not expected this, so I took a deep breath and a very long pause as that pastor just stared at me, neither of us not quite knowing what to do. When I thought that I had composed myself, I tried speaking once more, but no words came out. Only deep, deep sobs. Finally, as I looked up at that pastor with tears in my eyes and a heaviness in my spirit, I saw that he, too, was crying. So the two of us just sat there in his office, weeping and freely letting the tears fall. I was not able to speak for some time that day, nor was I fully able to understand exactly what happened until later. The only way to explain it is: I had such a sense of sadness and grief for what was going on in that church, and I was feeling just a small bit of the pain that the Spirit of God must feel when He is grieved, and I had carried that grief, that pain for months. And now, once in the office of that pastor, it just all broke forth, like a swollen river bursting through a yielding dam. Although I could say more about that day, I choose to not go any further at this time, except to say that this was a sovereign thing that occurred that day, and I understand it so much better today -- years removed from that time and place.

Over the years, what has been the hardest thing to understand is this: How a church that “began so well” (with so many dedicated people who obviously loved the Lord, and with so many gifts and movings of the Holy Spirit) could suddenly take a sharp turn off the path that God had chosen? You may ask: How do I know the path had deviated? Any time a church moves from true worship of the Lord God Who made us, and the focus has now become a fight or a struggle to see “who gets to do what”...that church has lost its way. It does not happen overnight. It doesn’t happen accidentally. And it doesn’t happen because only one or two people want it to be so. Anyone reading these words (who is not “fully satisfied” with where you or your church is today) knows...you can remember a time when your life was filled with Joy, Peace and Purpose. Some of you can recall never wanting to miss a Sunday evening service at your church, because you didn’t want to miss out on what God might do that night. Even the Wednesday night services had a special glow and a real purpose. We felt fulfilled and life (our lives and His Life within us) had meaning.

I can remember the early seventies, when we would gather to sing, praise and worship, and God would move and the Holy Spirit breathed Life. These were times that we felt full of Him. But something happened. I can almost recall the very day that it did. Again, this is something I have tried to share over the years, but I get mostly blank stares. I can remember when the applause began to spill out in our churches. I truly believe it happened almost simultaneously across America. We, the people in the pews, began applauding those who “brought the special music”; whether it was a soloist, duet, trio or choir. All across America we began to “worship the creature more than the Creator”, though we would certainly not admit to as much.

I say “we”, collectively, though I didn’t participate in this soulish display (it all but made me ill), and I was often chided for not clapping. Actually, Romans 1:25 states: They “...worshipped and served the creature more than the Creator...” That which we serve, we will worship, and vice versa. I saw this ugly thing arise in the early-to-middle seventies, primarily, if not solely because TV had now been introduced into the church. It was so ugly and perverse and contrary to the things and ways of God, and yet it calmly dwelt in the house of the Lord. And it still does today. Much of what is going on in our churches is an abomination, and I say so because of what Ezekiel writes in chapter 44, verses 6-8:

“...say to the rebellious house of Israel, Thus says the Lord God, ‘O you house of Israel, let it suffice you of all your abominations, in that you have brought strangers into My Sanctuary...strangers, uncircumcised in heart and uncircumcised in flesh, to be in My Sanctuary, to pollute it...when you offer my bread (I believe this can be seen as teaching or preaching), when you offer up fat and blood (this is our worship and praise to Him, as well as “special singing”), and they have broken My covenant because of all your abominations...And you have not kept the charge of My Holy things, but instead you have set keepers of My charge in My Sanctuary for yourselves.’”

I realize: We must give the Lord the honor due His Name “in the midst of the congregation”; we must give Him praise and recognition for the great things He has done, but I have sat in “praise and testimony services”, impatiently wondering when God was truly going to be “exalted”, or sometimes if He was ever even going to be “mentioned”. You may think me to be joking, but I am serious. Sometimes we get so “full of ourselves” that we forget to mention God. Our relationship in praise and worship (and testimony time) must be VERTICAL, going upward and throneward, drawing others to Him; not HORIZONTAL, where fleshy fingers may grasp it and hold it unto their own bosoms. Too much of the activity going on in our churches today is for our benefit, to make us feel good, to titillate our senses. Many times we sing, dance, clap and jump because it makes us feel good.

I can only recall one time in my life where a “spontaneous clap offering” broke out in the midst of a worship service. It was overwhelming; it was awesome (and that word has been tossed around much too casually these past few years...truly, we have yet to see the Awesome Hand of God at work!), and no man could have orchestrated such a thing. The Spirit of God just flowed through the place and “whoosh!”, we were all offering a true “clap offering” to the Lord. It was tremendous; it was a most gratifying and fulfilling moment, giving true praise to God in that manner. I have never forgotten the experience. I have also been in services where the person in charge has declared: “Let’s all put our hands together and offer up a clap offering”.

These two events are entirely different. One is spiritual; one is carnal. One is of the Spirit, flowing to the Throne; the other comes from the heart of man, and man is usually the beneficiary.

You may print this for further study or to share with friends. “Whosoever will, let him freely take of the Water of Life” (Revelation 22:17b)

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However, please do not change it, charge for it, or omit this paragraph. “Freely you have received, freely give” (Matthew 10:8b)