Christmas always snuck up on me. Well, it didn't really, but it seemed like it did. I would hear the ads on TV, and see the flyers, and avoid like the plague the commercialism of Christmas. But the children who were targeted by the TV, and inundated by Santa related paraphernalia at school, seemed to put the pressure on. "I want, I want, I want."
That wasn't what Christmas was all about. It was about the Savior, and about his birth. But try though I might, I couldn't get into the spirit of giving presents, and spending more money than I had, to satisfy their wants. The children seemed to interpret my unwillingness to give them just what they wanted, with not loving them, no matter how many cookies we baked.
To top it off, I felt that Christmas was all my job. It was up to me to bake, cook, shop, decorate, and wrap. Both of our extended families lived thousands of miles away, so to me Christmas wasn't a time of getting together with loved ones, just a lot of expectations and pressure, and stretching pennies till they were see-through.
It also seemed hypocritical that people suddenly became nice just for a week of the year, unless they were trying to find parking or line up at the checkouts.
This year as I was approached on three fronts to write about Christmas, I didn't want to think about it. I didn't have any stories about being blessed at the last minute with gifts for the little ones. We always had presents, they were usually received with, "Why didn't I get...How come she got...They got more..." My nineteen year old daughter had called me a Grinch, or a Scrooge for years, no matter how much I spent. Christmas morning to them was 'jackpot!'
So when the decorations started going up in October, I decided to do all I could to attain the Spirit so I could pass it on to them. I had heard of the sing-along Messiah in Ottawa, and decided to go. My husband who sings bass was pleased. I could follow some of the easy alto melody, the d, c, d, d, e, but I had to stop and listen while those around me sang the hard parts that sounded like a canoe floating smoothly over the rapids. I'd never be able to do that, but it didn't matter. There we were, surrounded by a thousand voices, reading and singing Handel's Messiah, the words of which were all quoted from the Bible. I could feel the Spirit of Christmas. It was that of the Savior.
I was impressed with the love that Handel had for Him, and the time it had taken him not only to write the music, but to search the scriptures for prophecies of His birth, life, death, and resurrection to use. He was an inspired man. My spirit was touched.
When I came home, I had a plan. The children would buy for each other. Each child would leave the holiday season not with the words, "I got," but "I gave".
One by one I took the children to inexpensive stores, armed with the month's grocery money and credit. They chose gifts for each other, while I made sure no one was left out. They took their gifts, wrapped them all by themselves, and stowed them under their beds. I didn't even check on the wrapping jobs.
I learned something this year. The giving didn't have to come from me. Nine year old Alida had said, "Kevin," who turns 17 on Christmas, "just wants chocolate." He was wise enough to know that everything he really wanted cost too much for us to buy him, so chocolate was his choice. At Hershey's in Smiths Falls, we bought a big bag of it for $10. Far less than the Lego ship he had desired years ago. Alida felt such joy filling the bag with bars by the pound. (I'll have to hide today's Citizen from him).
In the words of Thomas S. Monson, a Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints leader, "As we seek Christ, as we find Him, as we follow Him, we shall have the Christmas spirit, not for one fleeting day each year, but as a companion always. We shall learn to forget ourselves. We shall turn our thoughts to the greater benefit of others."
"We are prone to say, 'Oh, those were difficult times...but these times in which we live are also difficult in their own way. [However] there is no shortage of opportunities to forget self and think of others. There are hearts to gladden. There are kind words to say. There are gifts to be given. There are deeds to be done."
Go gladden the lonely, the dreary;
Go comfort the weeping, the weary;
Go scatter kind deeds on your way-
Oh, make the world brighter today.
(Deseret Sunday School Songs, no. 197.)
For the first time, the children have the spirit of Christmas.
I haven't heard much of "I want," but rather, "he wants."
Each are anxious to put their gifts under the tree, and so am I.
This is what Christmas is all about!