Part IV
Learning To Live In The Real World

The Lie

I don't believe you,
when you tell me you don't love me.
I don't believe you,
when you say you'll be okay.
I don't believe you,
when you say you want me to leave you.
But there's something I gotta say anyway.

Chorus:
I'm gonna love you for forever and for always.
I'm gonna love you 'til the stars fall from the sky.
And somewhere down the road I know I'll find you,
and we'll be together, just you and I.

How can I believe you,
when tears are falling from your eyes?
How can I believe you,
when you hold me, oh, so tight?
How can I believe you
when we gaze into each other's eyes?
How can I believe you,
when we love into the night?

Chorus:
I'm gonna love you for forever and for always.
I'm gonna love you 'til the stars fall from the sky.
And somewhere down the road I know I'll find you,
and we'll be together, just you and I.

The love we share will haunt you for so many days,
and as you lay and try to sleep I know you'll see I'm right;
You'll lie awake and tears'll fall down your face again,
longing to be with me all through the night.

Chorus:
I'm gonna love you for forever and for always.
I'm gonna love you 'til the stars fall from the sky.
And somewhere down the road I know I'll find you,
and we'll be together, just you and I.

(Repeat Chorus and Fade)



This poem is copyrighted 1988. It may not be reproduced or published in any form, including but not limited to anthologies, CD ROM, periodicals, and/or newspapers without the express written consent of the author. It may be used by individual instructors for limited classroom use. As a courtesy, instructors should e-mail the author decribing how and in what context it was used.


The Void

The night moves on bringing memories;
A touch, a smile, a whisper
But when I roll over in bed,
all that's there now,
is a pillow and an empty space;
Without a hand,
or a mouth,
or a voice.



This poem is copyrighted 1988. It may not be reproduced or published in any form, including but not limited to anthologies, CD ROM, periodicals, and/or newspapers without the express written consent of the author. It may be used by individual instructors for limited classroom use. As a courtesy, instructors should e-mail the author decribing how and in what context it was used.


Actor Without a Play

I wear a mask upon my face
to hide the pain in my soul.
I live my life as someone else,
an actor in a role.

I wake up in the morning,
I work 'til the sun is gone,
but I know that where I am,
is not where I belong.

My life has been taken from me,
my home, my hopes, my love.
My existence has been shattered,
by the woman I now only dream of.

Sometimes I wonder if I can go on,
keeping the promise I made;
To stay alive, no matter what,
living my life afraid.

I'm afraid to love and to be loved;
I try but oft' back away.
And when asked why I'm leaving,
I don't know what to say.

My mind is shackled? My heart has shut down?
No, they wouldn't understand what I mean.
They want me to give completely,
but my feelings are not what they seem.

When I tell them, "I love you", I mean I love YOU.
I can't risk the pain anymore.
So I just say goodbye, and they hate me I guess,
as I turn then and walk out the door.



This poem is copyrighted 1989. It may not be reproduced or published in any form, including but not limited to anthologies, CD ROM, periodicals, and/or newspapers without the express written consent of the author. It may be used by individual instructors for limited classroom use. As a courtesy, instructors should e-mail the author decribing how and in what context it was used.


Paradox Of Love

Tears were in your eyes that day,
your touch was still as tender,
your eyes as beautiful as ever,
dark blue that day and sparkling.

Our hearts were tearing,
our souls being ripped and torn,
the universe falling apart,
for me at least.

You said you thought it was best;
what "best"?
Best for you? Hiding deep within your mind,
heart in shackles in dark dungeon.

Best for me? To move on and grow?
My mind, body, and soul shattered,
feeling like the air had been sucked
from my lungs.

But I went, what else could I do?
There was no making sense in your mind.
no way of making you see the reality,
the truth that was fear overpowering the love.

You left me empty,
You stole my soul,
and for this
I will hate you forever.

The great paradox,
Hating you for letting me love you.

The two emotions
now residing in my heart.



This poem is copyrighted 1989. It may not be reproduced or published in any form, including but not limited to anthologies, CD ROM, periodicals, and/or newspapers without the express written consent of the author. It may be used by individual instructors for limited classroom use. As a courtesy, instructors should e-mail the author decribing how and in what context it was used.


Stuck In The Middle

For Pat

I called a friend the other day.
She said you were doing fine.
I usually asked about you,
but sometimes it hurt too much.

She tried to keep her comments short,
to move on to another subject;
Sometimes I persisted,
sometimes I let her.

She knew I still loved you,
and I think she knew you still loved me,
and tried to protect me, in her way,
simply by saying nothing.

I didn't like it that she was stuck in the middle,
but I couldn't let you go,
and as she used to say,
she was where she was.



This poem is copyrighted 1990. It may not be reproduced or published in any form, including but not limited to anthologies, CD ROM, periodicals, and/or newspapers without the express written consent of the author. It may be used by individual instructors for limited classroom use. As a courtesy, instructors should e-mail the author decribing how and in what context it was used.


No More Words

No more words.
Do you have no more words for me?
Nothing left to say?
Are you talked out?

No more words.
Lately it seems that's what you feel.
I thought we could be friends,
I thought we were friends.

No more words.
"It's a bad time, can I call you back?"
"Can we talk tomorrow? or next week?"
Shall I wait until my next life?

No more words,
or smiles, real smiles,
or "Hi, how are you",
or "Goodnight, I'll see you tomorrow, okay?"

Have you no more words for me?
We could talk without fear if we tried.
I don't want to change your life,
I only want to know I'm wrong about,
No more words.



This poem is copyrighted 1991. It may not be reproduced or published in any form, including but not limited to anthologies, CD ROM, periodicals, and/or newspapers without the express written consent of the author. It may be used by individual instructors for limited classroom use. As a courtesy, instructors should e-mail the author decribing how and in what context it was used.


Thief

I am alone,
and it is because of you.
You stole the stitching from the fabric of my soul.
I am alone,
and it is because of you.
I gave you my heart and you took it with you when you left.
I am alone,
and it is because of you.
You made me whole and left me empty.
I am alone,
and it is because of you.
Please return the things you have taken.



This poem is copyrighted 1990. It may not be reproduced or published in any form, including but not limited to anthologies, CD ROM, periodicals, and/or newspapers without the express written consent of the author. It may be used by individual instructors for limited classroom use. As a courtesy, instructors should e-mail the author decribing how and in what context it was used.


Wait

You ask me to wait,
again.
I don't remember your anger,
I only remember my pain.

You ask me to wait,
again.
I don't want you to hurt,
but I don't want to hurt either.

I loved you a long time ago,
and you loved me.
I don't know if you still do,
I feel I do.

You ask me to wait,
again.
I want to say, "what about me?!?!"
But I don't want to drive you away.

You ask me to wait,
again.
I know I sounded like I want to rush things on the phone,
but I don't, I know everything will take time.

I want to trust you, trust my instincts,
but the fear is overwhelming.
The pain for me was black and white,
and you still hold all the cards.

You ask me to wait,
again.
How many times and how much longer must I wait?
Hmmmm? I'm waiting for an answer.



This poem is copyrighted 1991. It may not be reproduced or published in any form, including but not limited to anthologies, CD ROM, periodicals, and/or newspapers without the express written consent of the author. It may be used by individual instructors for limited classroom use. As a courtesy, instructors should e-mail the author decribing how and in what context it was used.


Do Your Really Want Me?

Do you know how you feel?
Do you know how you are?
'Cause I sometimes wonder,
if you really want me.

I feel your love,
and I can see it sometimes,
but sometimes I wonder,
if you really want me.

Chorus:
Do you really want me,
to have and to hold?
Do you really want me,
with rings made of gold?
Through good times and bad times,
'til death do us part?
Do you really want me,
deep in your heart?

You're miles away,
sometimes when I hold you.
I call to you,
but you just don't hear.

You never push me away,
but times you don't hold me tight,
so I sometimes wonder,
as I turn out the light,

(Chorus)

Bridge:
This love that we share,
here in our room;
The talks that we have
late at night;
The good times and the bad,
and the rest that we've had;
I just wish that I didn't wonder.

(Chorus) (Repeat and Fade)



This poem is copyrighted 1993. It may not be reproduced or published in any form, including but not limited to anthologies, CD ROM, periodicals, and/or newspapers without the express written consent of the author. It may be used by individual instructors for limited classroom use. As a courtesy, instructors should e-mail the author decribing how and in what context it was used.


Not Much Different Than Me

He died today, and he was only twenty-three years old.
Not much different than me.
He was married a short time ago, had bought a house,
and his job was even finally secure, for a while at least,
But not his life.
The message said, "this is to inform you that he won't be in to work today,
He passed away last night."
In a voice awash with the anguish of a love lost,
that was only recently celebrated.
He died today, and he was only twenty-three years old.
Not much different than me...



This poem is copyrighted 1993. It may not be reproduced or published in any form, including but not limited to anthologies, CD ROM, periodicals, and/or newspapers without the express written consent of the author. It may be used by individual instructors for limited classroom use. As a courtesy, instructors should e-mail the author decribing how and in what context it was used.


Not Who I Thought

I wanted to be everything I thought you wanted me to be.
You didn't ask me to.
I wanted to be your knight in shining armor, your man of steel.
You didn't ask me to.
I wanted to be your most trusted friend.
You didn't ask me to.

And now I've let you down,
and I'm not what I thought you wanted me to be.
I'm not your knight in shining armor,
I'm not your man of steel,
and I'm not your most trusted friend anymore.

You didn't ask me to be,
and I failed trying to be,
and now all I've done is hurt you.

If you tell me what you want,
if you tell me what you see,
I'll try to be me.
Not necessarily what I thought you wanted me to be.
but not necessarily who you now think I am either.
Probably somewhere in between.

Just a man, who loves you with all my heart,
who cannot say how sorry he is,
and cannot undo what he has done,
but who will be there when you need him,
will listen to you when you speak,
and will talk to you when he needs to be heard.



This poem is copyrighted 1994. It may not be reproduced or published in any form, including but not limited to anthologies, CD ROM, periodicals, and/or newspapers without the express written consent of the author. It may be used by individual instructors for limited classroom use. As a courtesy, instructors should e-mail the author decribing how and in what context it was used.


Sarah's Lullaby

Close your eyes,
and give me a smile.
Try to sleep,
for a little while.

Take my hand,
and then you'll see,
In my heart,
you'll always be.

Teach me to laugh,
open my heart.
These things I feel,
emotions start.

Take my hand,
and then you'll see,
In my heart,
you'll always be.

Close your eyes,
and give me a smile.
Try to sleep,
for a little while.

Take my hand,
and then you'll see,
In my heart,
you'll always be.



This poem is copyrighted 1995. It may not be reproduced or published in any form, including but not limited to anthologies, CD ROM, periodicals, and/or newspapers without the express written consent of the author. It may be used by individual instructors for limited classroom use. As a courtesy, instructors should e-mail the author decribing how and in what context it was used.


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