Sickness:     NO excuses will be acceptable.  We will no longer accept your doctors
                   statement as proof of illness as we believe, that if you are able to go to
                   the doctor, you are able to come to work.
 
 

Death:          (Other than your own)  This is no excuse as it is too late to do anything for
                    those concerned.  We are sure that someone else in a lesser position could take
                    care of the arrangements.  However, if you could arrange for the funeral
                    service to be held late in the afternoon, we could let you off an hour early,
                    provided all is up to date.
 
 

Leave Of Absence:     (For an operation)  We are no longer allowing this practice.  We wish
                                 to  discourage any thoughts that you may need an operation, as we
                                 believe as long as you are an employee here, you will need all of
                                 whatever you have, and you should not consider having anything
                                 removed.  We hired you as you are and to have anything removed
                                 would certainly make you less than we bargained for.
 
 

Death:       (your own)  This will be accepted as an excuse, but we would like at least two
                 weeks notice as we feel it is your duty to teach someone else your job.
 
 

Also:       Entirely too much time is being spent in the washrooms.  In the future, you will
               follow the practice of going in alphabetical order.  For instance, those whose
               surnames begin with "A" will go from 9:00 to 9:15 and so on.  If you are
               unable to go at your appointed time, it will be necessary to wait until the next
               day when your turn comes round again.