EXCUSE THIS HOUSE

Some houses try to hide the fact
That children shelter there;
Ours boasts of it quite openly,
The signs are everywhere.
For smears are on the windows,
Little smudges on the doors;
I should apologize, I guess,
For toys strewn on the floor.
But I sat down with the children
And we played and laughed and read;
And if the doorbell doesn't shine,
Their eyes will shine instead.
For when at times I'm forced to choose
The one job or the other;
I'd like to cook and clean and scrub,
But first I'll be a mother.

These poems are written by Judith Viorst who is also the author of Alexander & The Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day.

BERTHA'S WISH

I wish that I didn't have freckles on my face.
I wish that my stomach went in instead of out.
I wish that he would stand on the top of the tallest
building and shout,
"I love you Amanda."
One more wish: I wish my name was Amanda.

THOUGHTS ON GETTING OUT OF A NICE WARM BED
IN AN ICE-COLD HOUSE TO GO TO
THE BATHROOM AT THREE O'CLOCK IN THE MORNING

Maybe life was better
when I used to be wetter.

SHORT LOVE POEM

It's hard to love
The tallest girl
When you're the shortest guy,
For every time
You try to look
Your true love in the eye
You see
Her bellybutton.

...AND THEN THE PRINCE KNELT DOWN AND TRIED TO PUT
THE GLASS SLIPPER ON CINDERELLA'S FOOT

I really didn't notice that he had a funny nose.
And he certainly looked better all dressed up in fancy clothes.
He's not nearly as attractive as he seemed the other night.
So I think I'll just pretend that this glass slipper feels too tight.

THANK YOU NOTE

I wanted small pierced earrings (gold)
You gave me slippers (gray).
My mother said that she would scold
Unless I wrote to say
How much I liked them.

Not much.

REMEMBER ME?

What will they say
When I've gone away:
He was handsome? He was fun?
He shared his gum? He wasn't
Too dumb or too smart? He
Played a good game of volley ball?
Or will they only say
He stepped in the dog doo
At Jimmy Altman's party?

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