Please Listen To Me  by Katlyn

I want to tell you how I feel about my mom being sick.Because maybe you will know
how bad lung disease is and it all starts with smoking mostly.
I am Katlyn Adkins and I’m 10 and I already lost my father and now my mom is sick.
She gets colds from me and I feel real bad but its not my fault because she gets colds
from anyone even at the store.

Written by Sharon (Kate's Mother)
Katlyn has been through much, just as all family members of the chronically ill have.
This letter has helped to make me understand her feelings and to appreciate HOW she feels.
This disease affects all who are involved in the lives of the one who has lung disease.  The families are under tremendous emotional stress, at times.  Family members become caregivers and have to take on more than their share.  The person who is ill, feels guilty and sometimes worthless.  Communication within the family is so very important for the emotional health of all.
Kate and I are very close and love each other dearly.  Thank you for creating these pages.
I am very proud of you Kate!

UPDATE

UPDATE  July 24, 2000

There were two tumors and they were cancer but the doctor said it's 80% that they got it all out.
I don't want to think about it right now. I'm glad we got back home and we are all still together.

 UPDATE August, 2000

 Mom's Oncologist sent her for a brain scan and bone scan to check for new cancer.  We hope he doesn't find anything but we won't know for a few days.

UPDATE February 2001

So far Mom is doing okay.  She hasn't had any new cancers yet so I'm just happy.   Her breathing has worsened because of fibrosis in her lung where they did the surgery.  She has to be on oxygen all the time and has a hard time walking very far.  The good thing is that she has a handicap parking permit now.
She has bad pain from the nerve damage from the surgery so is on pain medication and takes physical therapy.  They tried the nerve blocks in her ribs but they only worked for a couple days and they are very painful to get.
When they did the surgery they cut some of the ribs out so some parts are missing.  There's muscles that cramp up and get sore to.
She had strep throat a few weeks ago and she coughed a lot.  The doctor thinks she has cracked a couple of ribs.  Her bones can break very easy because she has osteoporosis from having to take steriods for her lungs.

My twin nephews where born in November but baby Connor didn't make it.  He had problems with his organs developing and he died when he was two days old.  I will always miss him.  Baby Carson is a sweet baby and is doing just fine.  I love him so much.  My brother and sister in law brought him out before they went back to Italy.  I miss them a lot.
Grandma died on New Years' Eve day.  She had Alzheimers' and lived in a nursing home for 2 years.  Grandpa is very sad and so am I.  They were married for 55 years.

I got my passport so I can go to Italy this summer to visit my brother.  I know Carson is probably getting big by now.
It's so hard to think about leaving Mom for 3 weeks.  I worry about her so much but she wants me to go.  She has a home nurse if she needs to call her.   And Grandpa is nearby also.  But still I can't hardly think about having a good time.  I hope I feel better about this before I leave.

February 2002
Things are going pretty good right now.  My trip to Italy was really fun and I got to see a lot of the old ruins in Rome and also I went on a site seeing cruise off the islands.
I learned that United States has much more modern things here and I'd never want to leave here to live in another country.  We have more freedoms and a lot of things that they consider luxuries.
Mom has been sick more than she used to be and she's tired all the time but she is still cancer free.  She is depressed a lot because of all the medicine she has to take but we still have fun together watching movies and playing board games.  She still goes into the hospital for one day every four weeks to get her infusions of gamma globlin to get her immune system to work better.  Her oxygen is still set at 2L so that hasn't changed.
I have been sick a lot with colds, sore throats and stomach problems for the last few months and we know it's because my immune system doesn't work like it should, just like my moms.  So I've missed a lot of school and it's been hard to catch up sometimes.  I feel lucky that I still got As and Bs on my report card but I also got a C and that makes me mad at myself.  I want to go to Harvard Law school some day if I can get a scholarship so I'm taking advanced classes next year with a full load and no study halls.  That's what it takes to get scholarships.  I will be a freshman in high school next year and that's REALLY scary.  ha ha

April 2002

Mom's doing about the same.  She only weighs 90 lbs and looks very weak but she still gets up every morning and goes to her computer to read her EFFORTS mail.
I've been missing more school so I went to a doctor and he said I have asthma.  Now I'm using inhalers like mom.  yuck
I've had a fever for a while so I had to go to a special sinus doctor and he said the cat scan showed that I have a large bone spur in my sinus and it's causing a lot of infection.  I have to have surgery on May 21st.  My mom has a bone spur in the same place that I do but hers is smaller.  She will also have to have surgery if her sinus infection doesn't clear up.  It's really weird that we were both born with this deformity.  We got the same virus and it wouldn't go away so that's how they found the problem.
Mom talked to my principal and they are going to graduate me three weeks early so I can finish this school year.  I hate having surgery but if it makes me feel better I will have to do it.  Next year is high school and I've got a lot of hard classes to take if I want to go to Harvard.  I can't be getting sick all the time.
Two years ago I had to have home schooling for a whole year because I had a pseudomonas infection in my ears that wouldn't go away. The infection got into the cartilage and bone and the antibiotics wouldn't get rid of it.  They had to use PICC lines in my arms so I could have IV antibiotic therapy for almost eight months.  I don't EVER want to go through THAT again!
Bye for now.

December 2002

Mom is still doing good.  She has pneumonia or bronchitis most of the time and takes antibiotics a lot.  She had to quit her infusions for a while because of problems with our insurance but she will be starting them again soon.
I'm on the honor roll again this year and I started playing the guitar a little.
It's Christmas time and I'm very thankful that I still have my mom.

June 2003

I haven't written for a while because I've been very busy with school and my new job.  I work part time at Taco Bell.
The school year was pretty rough for me but I made it through.
I've changed my plans on attending college and I will most likely go into the Navy or Marines after I finish high school.   That way I can get my schooling free and I'll have more time to decide what I want to go into.

Mom has had a lot of problems this year.  Mostly bad colds and viruses.
She had her 3 year check-up for her cancer and is still cancer-free.  In two more years she will celebrate her 5 year survival for cancer and then she won't have to be as worried about the cancer returning.
She now has to take water pills because her legs swell up due to water retension.  People with lung disease often end up with right-side heart failure because their heart doesn't pump the blood properly.  She's also having problems with high blood pressure due to the same reason so has to take medication for that too.
The newer medications for lung disease are great.  They've helped her to live a better life and she's able to breathe a lot better now.

I'm now 15 and I feel more secure about my mother being here to see me graduate from high school.  It's been a very scary 5 years and I've learned that only God can help us through the bad parts of our lives.

Please, please, listen to me.  Don't ever start smoking!  If you already smoke, please quit!