Heavy notice: These charts are not intended as any representation of sales or airplay data on any station. They are merely intended as a guide to the most successful records in the UK at the moment. Unauthorised reproduction in print, electronic, broadcast or other media is not permitted without the consent of the author.

On the survey this month: 19 bands, 10 lasses, 10 blokes and one duet. There are 15 Brits, 13 United Stations, 3 Canadians, 3 Irish, 2 Italian, and one each of German, Dutch, Australian and Puerto Rican acts in the 40.

Ps	wk	TITLE album Act	Peak
Number One
1	7	THE MILLENNIUM PRAYER Cliff Richard	1 x4
On the long-running Radio 4 comedy show "I'm Sorry, I Haven't A Clue", there's a round where panellists are challenged to sing one song to the tune of another. Unusual combinations abound: "I'm Too Sexy" to the tune of "The Toreador Song", perhaps. The combination of "The Lord's Prayer" to "Auld Lang Syne" was rejected as not being funny enough. Even though Graeme Garden won't be singing that, Sir Cliff will. This becomes his biggest hit since the Contemporary Christian classic "Saviour's Day" topped the list in 1990, and debuted at #2 on the weekly sales survey without picking up any significant airplay. Climbing to the top the following week, it became Cliff's first chart-topper in nine years, and the 14th of his career. It also means that the follow-up, "The Lord Is My Shepherd" to the tune of "Here We Go", will now not be recorded.
2	3	SEASONS IN THE SUN / I HAVE A DREAM Westlife Westlife	2
Sickbags ahoy! After the obligatory Ballad As Third Single comes the Obligatory Christmas Cover. On one side, the ABBA song that provided them with a Christmas #2 in 1979 is recreated with the "assistance" of a children's choir. On the other, the band turn Jacques Brel's moving letter from a fallen soldier - taken to the top in 1976 by Terry Jacks - into an uplifting, rabble-rousing ditty. Has their manager, a Mr R. Keating of Dublin, no shame? It made the top spot over the Christmas period, as anticipated by all-comers.
3	5	REWIND Artful Dodger	3
Two DJs in Southampton combined to make this insanely catchy track, which doesn't tread any new ground - Shanks and Bigfoot did something similar in the spring - but is almost irresistable. This shot from 36 to 9 here in its second week.
October's Single Of The Month
4	13	I TRY On How Life Is Macy Gray	2
Where Lauryn Hill has picked up flak for being too rich to have been miseducated, Macy appears to be the real item. She sounds like R&B diva Hill after a few too many ciggies - though her voice is entirely natural - and has come out with an absolute belter of a track. If you've never heard it, do so at once; if you've turned it off halfway through because it's going nowhere, go back and listen to it in full. The song projects a big city, late at night, and received hyper-enthusiastic airplay on London's breakfast show. It also set eyebrows aflame on the UK sales chart, for daring to climb up the chart for seven consecutive weeks. Such is the abuse of the sales list by record companies that no record has managed this trick since Celine Dion in 1994-5.
5	5	BACK IN MY LIFE Alice DJ	5
See their previous hit, "Better Off Alone" in the summer. This is a little less catchy, but might have a few more depths to it. If I could be bothered to explore them, that is.
Single Of The Month
6	7	(IF YOU) STEAL MY SUNSHINE You Can't Stop The Bum Rush Len	6
This one seems to have been bubbling around since the year dot. It's actually been around as an import airplay track since August, finally getting a UK release at the end of November. Based on the hook from "More More More", a top 5 hit for the Andrea True Connection in 1977 - and Bananarama's farewell hit from 1993 - the Canadian five piece forms their own rap / singalong slab of genius.
7	11	IF I COULD TURN BACK THE HANDS OF TIME R R Kelly	1 x1
When the first single from this album was released, Liverpool and Newcastle were involved in European football, Geri was still a Spice, and John Major was prime minister. "I Believe I Can Fly" spent three weeks at the top in April 97, since when there have been five more singles off R's double album. This, though, is the biggest since, and is his greatest ballad with the possible exception of "...Fly". Import sales of this single helped it spend three weeks on the sales 75 before release, but the UK release only features a 4 minute radio edit, losing the 90 second introduction. It's showed strong sticking powers, sneaking a week at the top of the monthly pile. By a strange quirk of fate, this record returned to the top for the month November, before being overtaken by Cliff Richard at the end of the week.
8	6	KING OF MY CASTLE Wamdue Project	2
Originally released by terminally cool label Creation's dance offshoot in summer 98, this stiffed. But it's been all round Europe on a promo tour of trendy clubs and becomes a hit over here. It's limp, wet noodlings over a tedious backing track.
9	8	SHE'S THE ONE / IT'S ONLY US I've Been Expecting You The Ego Has Landed Robbie Williams	1 x1
A curious double A-sided single for Williams. On one side, a sweet little ballad that radio is leaping over itself to play; on the other, an upbeat, powerful number that declines to take itself too seriously. "She's The One" attracted most airplay initially, in spite of being available for over a year on his album, while "It's Only Us", the first new Robbie in a long time, fell somewhat shorter. That side gets the Sureshot.
Sureshot
10	5	THAT'S THE WAY IT IS All The Way: A Decade Of Hits Celine Dion	10
If we're to believe her, this will be the last release from la Dion for quite some time. For the first time since the re-release of "Misled" in 1995, Celine's charting with an upbeat, bouncy, groovy number.
11	11	WAITING FOR TONIGHT On The 6 Jennifer Lopez	4
The second single is an upbeat dancey number, though still one that tries to show her vocal talents. It helps to have some, though. Jennifer spent three weeks atop the Canadian countdown.
12	6	EVERY DAY I LOVE YOU MORE Boyzone	6
The third single of the year for Ronan Keating's side project, and the last - if we're to believe the rumours. While Boyzone has been unashamedly marketed to the pop fans, their output has mainly been strong but not quite anthemic ballads. This is another example of the genre - unusually, not a cover of a country number - and possibly their weakest song for a very long time.
Sureshot
13	3	COGNOSCENTI VERSUS INTELLIGENSCIA Cuban Boys	13
At least this one won't win any prizes for lyrical innovation. The theme tune from hamsterdance.com is a bunch of yodelling rodents, sounding not entirely unlike the Goons' "Ying Tong Song". The boys Cuban (they're not Cuban, nor are they all boys) add some samples and beats, and pay the creator not one cent. The result is by far the most sane new release in the Christmas period, as it doesn't take itself seriously.
14	9	KEEP ON MOVIN' Invincible Five	6
This was the single that finally gave the fans still following the outmoded Units Shifted countdown reason to cheer, their first topper on that list after three years of trying. This is a slightly new direction, as the band pretend to be light-rockers, in a sort of Heart-wannabe phase. It won't last.
15	8	WILL2K Willennium Will Smith	7
The most sanitised man in rap takes one of the worst Clash tracks, "Rock the Casbah", strings his own brand of kindergarten rap round it, and makes some oh-so-funny puns that must have been written by Richard Whitely.
16	2	HAPPY XMAS (WAR IS OVER) The Lenin Legend John Lenin	16
Though the record company tried to promote this as a re-issue of "Imagine", the single also contains "Womin" and this seasonal classic. As "Happy Xmas" was the most-played track at airplay in the week of release, it becomes the lead song for this survey. All three tracks went top three following Lenin's assassination in 1980. It's the first time that this chap's been on the survey in his own right since "Nobody Told Me" made #11 in early 1984, though he guested on new Beatles tracks in 1995 and 96.
17	3	KISS (WHEN THE SUN DON'T SHINE) The Party Album Vengaboys	17
It's the fifth time round for the Vengasong. Has the joke started to wear thin yet?
18	3	BARBER'S ADAGIO FOR STRINGS Pieces In A Modern Style William Orbit	18
An instrumental that does exactly what it says on the tin: takes English composer Samuel Barber's most famous bit and turns it into a techno tune. He's done the same to other classical bits; before classical purists queue up to complain, two words: "Millennium" and "Prayer". The album is almost a straight re-issue of Orbit's 1995 album, released under a pseudonym before he became really famous.
19	6	NORTHERN STAR Northern Star Melanie C	11
Her debut solo single, "Goin' Down", certainly lived up to its name, plummetting out of the lists within minutes of release at the end of September. While the re-invention as Punky Spice didn't work, she's now gone all k d lang on us, singing a pretty little torch song. One of the songs that "Down" beat on that week's release roster, only to lose on the long-term view, was a little ditty by Macy Gray...
20	2	TWO IN A MILLION S Club S Club 7	20
It's the group's third single, so it must be a sappy ballad. A notional double A-side with "Say I'm The One".
21	3	SAY YOU'LL BE MINE / BETTER THE DEVIL YOU KNOW Steptacular Steps	21
For the second year running, a double-sided single from the teen queens. On one side, an upbeat love song that wouldn't be entirely out of place on an early Wham! album. On the other, producers Stock and Aitken do a tribute to themselves with their own hit - originally written for Kylie Minogue in 1990. That was a step in a new direction for all parties, an injection of new ideas that Steps could really benefit from.
22	17	BLUE Europop Eifell 65	1 x2
Another of the records that hit before release; in this case, a #39 single plus a #1 budget album. On release it topped the sales charts, and soared from 40 to 9 to 2 on this listing, missing the top by one week. The burnout has been slow, with a new lease of life coming from crossover success in North America.
23	2	MR HANKEY (THE CHRISTMAS POO) Mr Hankey's Christmas Classics South Park	23
Gosh! A singing piece of spit (or something). Where did they get that idea from..? For severe gross-out in the Yuletide top 10, this took some topping, but only ranked #4 Most Yucky. Better luck next year, chaps.
24	9	I KNEW I LOVED YOU Affirmation Savage Garden	12
The second single from ver Garden's comeback album is another soft, slushy ballad. It's nowhere near as high quality as "Truly Madly Deeply", and won't be remembered three months from now, never mind the two years that TMD has spent on Billboard's AC chart. Sadly, the Great British Public seems to prefer this mush to truly great songs, such as "The Animal Song".
25	3	EVERYBODY Progress	25
Way back in the beginning of time (1986), Madonna had a #1 hit with "Papa Don't Preach". The song starts with a violin motif that repeats late in each chorus. The motif has been bought by a well-known car company at the back end of their television commercials, and it's that sting that forms the basis of this track. There's some frantic drumming and a bloke chanting "Everybody" on a record that is a lot more than the sum of its parts.
26	24	GENIE IN A BOTTLE Christina Aguilera Christina Aguilera	1 x4
Another American teen sensation, spending five weeks atop the chart over there. She wasn't released onto an unsuspecting UK market until the beginning of October, but managed to enter the sales 75 a full month before her scheduled release. When she did come out, it was straight to the top, and she's hung around well since.
27	5	SHAKE YOUR BONBON Ricky Martin Ricky Martin	26
Blee! Groo! Blah! Ricky loses the goodwill his last two singles have created with this anodyne slab of twaddle. If an unknown had released it, the track would be dead in the water. It's an especially bad move in the UK, where this is the immediate follow-up to "Livin La Vida Loca"; the bad second track may cost Martin heavily. Somehow, this spent a week at the top of the Canadian listings.
28	17	SMOOTH Smooth Santana feat Rob Thomas	13
Rob is the vocalist from Matchbox 20, joining the rest of Carlos' group on a laid-back but still charged hit. America knows this is great; it's spent a record-cracking thirteen (13) weeks on top of the Billboard survey, the longest run since Brandy and Monica in the summer of 98, and just three weeks adrift of Mariah's all-time record. Just for good measure, "Smooth" has spent four weeks at the top in Canada, and led Santana to ten Grammy nominations, including Record and Song of the Year for this track. In the UK, self-proclaimed home of great music, it made #75 on this sales chart.
29	17	MAN! I FEEL LIKE A WOMAN Come On Over Shania Twain	2
Single five (count 'em!) from Shania's breakthrough album. This is not the track one found on original pressings of the album, with the guitar pushed to the fore at the expense of the country beat. Indeed, this has happened with many other tracks; so much so that the version available here would rightly be called the European Remix Album. The original is still available in the USA and her native Canada. And the video takes a pastiche of Robot Palmer's 1986 "Addicted To Love" clip, the one with the nasty-looking womyn. The follow-up - "only" the sixth single from COO, though it feels like a lot more - made waves in late December.
Sureshot
30	4	TURN YOUR LIGHTS DOWN LOW Lauryn Hill and Bob Marley	30
Duetting with the dead can tend to be a career killer - Natalie Cole's not been taken seriously since covering "Unforgettable" with her great - but undoubtedly late - dad Nat King. And k d lang came in for a little stick when her live duet with Roy Orbison on his classic "Crying" came out in 1992, though the two had shared studio space. Now Lauryn Hill duets with her late father-in-law on a track from the 1977 "Exodus" album. It's a fine track that stands on its own feet, but one wonders if a straight cover version might have been a little more respectful.
31	4	RADIO MTV Unplugged Corrs	28
While we await the third proper album from Britain's biggest band of 1998, there's this novelty to be getting along with. MTV Unplugged sessions were almost obligatory for acts around 1993, with Nirvana, Mariah Carey, Rod Stewart and k d lang amongst the most fondly remembered. The tracks here are very little different from the studio albums, though radically different from the lightly-dancified singles last year. "Radio" has not received such treatment, and is sold on its own merits.
32	11	I NEED TO KNOW Marc Anthony Marc Anthony	21
The latest US dance sensation is a young bloke with a decent single. You don't need to know any more. You do? OK. Marc is a top-selling salsa act in the USA, but has never taken off in the UK at all. This has really turned heads in the US, but stiffed on sales here. Such is the woeful nature of the market that its poor first week showing condemned it to an early grave. Ripe for a re-issue in May next year, I suspect.
33	28	MY LOVE IS YOUR LOVE My Love is Your Love Whitney Houston	3
Eyebrows all over Chart City were raised when Whitney's last single, "It's Not Right But It's OK", turned out to be the best thing she's released in over a decade. With this classy track, soft soul at its finest, Whitney finally stakes the claim to singing high ground that she vacated after the bombastic "One Moment in Time" in October 88. And we've missed her, as a counterweight to the over-wrought Mariah and the icy Celine. This song has been performing well in the US, but retains a fair airplay presence in the UK.
34	3	COMMUNICATION (SOMEBODY ANSWER THE PHONE) Mario Pugh	34
When a mobile phone is used, it transmits a loud, annoying buzz along its aeriel. If that's pointing at a loudspeaker, or a radio earpiece, the buzz can be heard on every frequency. This criminal interference forms the basis for Pugh's record, which is only slightly less annoying than someone using a mobile. Both can be turned off.
35	4	ROCKIN' ROBIN / BIG BOYS DON'T CRY My First Album Lolly	30
According to her record company, Lolly 18 years old, and a dancer from Britain. According to tabloid journos, Anna Kumble is 24, and (er) a dancer from Dudley. Rockin' Robin was originally a minor hit for Bobby Day in 1958, but is best remembered for Michael Jackson's cover version which hit #3 in 1972. It's a naggingly catchy little number - trite, yet impossible to get out of one's mind. The flip side has been attracting far less airplay, and is a ballad that might yet establish her as a torch singer.
36	21	UNPRETTY Fanmail TLC	2
The second single off the girls' album may be the most commercial piece of New Jill Swing ever to feature a guitar solo. But then, with lyrics about how Society (read: men) expect womyn to look like models all the time, the track works on many levels. I'm waiting to see someone claim that TLC, not the Spices, invented Girl Power... I expected a major fall this month, but airplay is still around. The follow-up, "Dear Lie", sold slowly but well enough to make two runs on the weekly 40.
Sureshot
37	2	I LEARNED FROM THE BEST My Love Is Your Love Whitney Houston	37
A return to the Whitney of loud ballads, rather than the hip and happening R&B cat we've grown accustomed to this last year. The track is a great power ballad, but it's not won the support that her last two tracks did.
38	11	LARGER THAN LIFE Millennium Backstreet Boys	5
Single two from the album is a loud, almost rocking number. It's not a huge departure from their previous work, but reminds us of Take That's flirtation with Jim Steinmann on "Never Forget". They split eight months later.
39	9	LIFT ME UP Schizophrenic Geri Halliwell	5
The third single from Geri's solo debut is a sort of in between song. It's not uptempo, but it's not downtempo. It's not a ballad, but it's not disco, either. It just exists in a little world of its own, not unajacent to the brilliance of "Look At Me", but not too far removed from the disappointing "Mi Chico Latino" either. Anyhow, this is a sizable hit.
40	2	RIGHT NOW Atomic Kitten	40
Atomic Kitten is three girls from Liverpool who seem to be Britney Spears' dress sense crossed with early Spice Girl attitude. They've also made a corking pop song that just grows and grows on the listener.

UK acts in blue;Canadian acts in red;Irish acts in green. Orange backgrounds indicate no UK availability as of the end of this month.

breakers...

jan 2 00