It was time for elderly Father John's Saturday night bath, and young nun, Sister
Magdalene had prepared the bath water and towels just the way the old nun had
instructed. Sister Magdalene was also instructed not to look at Father John's nakedness if
she could help it, do whatever he told her to do, and pray. The next morning the old nun
asked Sister Magdalene how the Saturday night bath had gone. "Oh, sister," said the
young nun dreamily. " I've been saved." "Saved? And how did that fine thing come
about?" asked the old nun. "Well, when Father John was soaking in the tub, he asked me
to wash him, and while I was washing him he guided my hand down between his legs
where he said the Lord keeps the Key to Heaven." "Did he now?" said the old nun evenly.
Sister Magdalene continued, "And Father John said that if the Key to Heaven fit my lock,
the portals of Heaven would be opened to me and I would be assured of salvation and
eternal peace. And then Father John guided his Key to Heaven into my lock." "Is that a
fact?" said the old nun even more evenly. "At first it hurt terribly, but Father John said the
pathway to salvation was often painful and that the glory of God would soon swell my
heart with ecstasy. And it did, it felt so good being saved." "That wicked old Devil!" said
the old nun. "He told me it was Gabriel's Horn and I've been blowing it for 40 years!"
