Friends

.... A simple friend can stand by you when you are right,
but a real friend will stand by you even when you are wrong

.... A simple friend identifies himself when he calls.
A real friend doesn't have to.

.... A simple friend opens a conversation with a full news bulletin on his life.
A real friend says, "What's new with you?"

.... A simple friend thinks the problems you whine about are recent.
A real friend says, "You've been whining about the same thing for 14 years. Get off your duff and do something about it."

.... A simple friend has never seen you cry.
A real friend has shoulders soggy from your tears.

.... A simple friend doesn't know your parent's first names.
A real friend has their phone numbers in his address book.

.... A simple friend brings a bottle of wine to your party.
A real friend comes early to help you cook and stays late to help you clean.

.... A simple friend hates it when you call after he has gone to bed.
A real friend asks you why you took so long to call.

.... A simple friend seeks to talk with you about your problems.
A real friend seeks to help you with your problems.

.... A simple friend wonders about your romantic history.
A real friend could blackmail you with it.

.... A simple friend, when visiting, acts like a guest.
Real friend opens your refrigerator and helps himself/herself.

.... A simple friend thinks the friendship is over when you have an argument.
A real friend knows that it's not a friendship until after you've had a fight.

.... A simple friend expects you to always be there for them.
A real friend expects to always be there for you!