I hope that this page will be able to help family members reunite with lost or missing member's CAUSED BY THE FOSTERCARE/COURT SYSTEM.
Once long ago there was a family which included three children. We thought we were happy. We lived like most low-income families, modest, but we were all together as one family. Then one day while the kids were at the doctor's office, one child told the doctor what would prove that this family was not a normal family. So the doctor took matters into her own hands and contacted the authorities...a move that would forever change this family for generations to come. Well, the next week the doctor had arranged for the girls to take a tour of the courthouse or at least that was the story that the girls and their mother were told. While at the courthouse, the girls learned that they would not be going home that night or the next. Instead, they would be going to what is called a foster home, where they would live with total strangers until the court, the doctor and the caseworker's could determine "what is in the best interest of the children". All this time, the girls thought and felt that their family didn't love them or care what happened to them...and in the process...learning not to trust or care about anyone. Only depending on one another, cutting the rest of the world off. After what seemed like forever, the girls were allowed to see their mother and brother but only in a small room in the Social Service Building for 1 short hour, with a caseworker watching and listening. This so-called visiting went on for weeks or months. Finally, the girls were forced to go to court and testify with the promise that when this was over, they would be able to go home to their mother and brother and become a family again. To say the least, after weeks of court hearings, the girls were still in foster care, now getting used to being in this foster home. Once again the girls were uprooted and moved to a "group home", just another word for a foster home but this kind has more children living in the same home. Needless to say, it was not home with their mother and brother like they were told. Once a child is put in the foster care system, they learn real quickly "don't believe or trust anyone", or at least my family did. The next move was to our "legal father", a man that neither one us had ever known, but now at 9 years old, he had decided that he wanted his "daughters" and that court system moved us in with him saying "it was in the best interest of the children". That so-called "in the best interest of the children" lasted almost six months and then it was back to another foster home. Finally, a few months later, we did get to go back and live with our mother and brother, only to hate everyone including our mother and brother. Our mother because she didn't come take us home and our brother because he got to stay at home with her. By now, my sister was getting into fights with our mom, always doing what she wanted, knowing all she had to do was tell the courts what they wanted to hear even if was not true, just to get what she wanted. Now for me, I just hated everybody and started being known as a "loner". Mom made arrangements for my sister to stay with a family member hoping that they could work things out. After awhile, I got out of control and mom's health was not doing well so I was put back into a foster home on a temporary basis. After a couple of weeks I went back home. My sister stayed with our aunt, but finally we were all reunited again and we all moved to a new town hoping for a new start, but that only lasted a short time. I started running around with the wrong crowd and got into drugs, started drinking, and sleeping around with grown men. All of this happened in less then 13 years. My sister, on the other hand, hated everyone and she let it be known. Our mom had a stroke and she was only 30 years old. She knew that there was no way she could care for us and we let her know that we didn't want to be with her, so once again it was back to foster care. This time for the rest of our childhood. By this time, none of us got along, so my sister was put in one foster home in one town and I was put into another foster home in another town. Little did we both know that we really did not want to be alone in a strange place but when you are hurt and angry, you say things that you don't mean and that can hurt the people that you love most. We both stayed in foster care until we were almost 18 years old. I ran away from my 4th foster home after we were put back into foster care about two weeks before I turned 18 years old. After meeting a man who was 11 years older than me, and thinking I had finally found someone who really cared for and about me, I got married a couple of years later and had a little boy. But then I got a divorce. I then met my present husband. We have two daughters. We have had our bad times and good times but I still find it very hard to trust most people. I still don't like or trust caseworkers, but all with good reason. Now the two sisters are both 30 years old and have children of our own. One of the girls had both of her sons's taken away from her and put into foster care, after she asked for help to learn how to help her oldest child, and to have help in dealing with his disabilities. She also had a disagreement with the caseworker in charge of getting her help. For that her parental rights have been terminated on both children and the oldest one is living in foster care, and on occasion in a mental institution for the same problem that she was told she was making up, to get people to feel sorry for her. The reason for her losing all of her rights to ever see her children grow up. Thankfully, the youngest one is living with a family member on his father's side but both of the boys feel like their family, most of all their mother, doesn't want or love them. Please don't get me wrong. I am not saying that all foster care parents or systems are bad or that no child ever needs to be taken away from a parent. But I do feel that if the court system would really try to put themselves in the place of the family or at least the child or children in the case. That they could help keep families together and maybe have children in this and future generation’s respect their families and other people a whole lot more than what children do now.
IF ANYONE READING THIS HAS A STORY OR SIMILAR EXPERIENCE AND WOULD LIKE TO SHARE IT WITH OTHERS, PLEASE SEND ME AN EMAIL. I WILL BE ADDING A COMMENT PAGE AS SOON AS I CAN.
Also, if I can help anyone who has been or is a foster child in any way or you just need someone to talk to please feel free to send me an email, and I will get back to you as soon as possible.
I would be very greatful,if anyone has any information that could help me find my nephews, I truely want them to know that they are cared for and loved very much.
FOSTERCARE
I had this page made to help find any information about my nephews Sterling and Quint. Any information about either one of them or both would be great and thank you would not say how GREATFUL I WOULD BE.
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And all the foster children out there. This is how they use to be before foster care.
And this is during foster care
BUT LIKE I SAID USED TO BE BUT THAT WAS 3 YEARS AGO.
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