A holiday classic ... version 2:

Twas two nights before tapings, and Ashley, with Whosers,
Was getting decked out for the night, like a loser.
She put on a skirt, 'round the room she did rage,
Trying to look quite older than her age.
Having dressed to the nines, Lil' Ashley to eights,
They left the Best Western for, with destiny, a date.

At the Improv tonight, they knew they'd see Ryan,
Drew, he was sick, but heck, they weren't cryin'!
Just Ryan was fine, they would never say "just,"
For talking to the Mutant Dwarf was a must.
They'd bandied about the idea that dear Colin
Might be there tonight, but who were they kidding??
He wouldn't show! No way! What were they: nuts??

With fluttering hearts, they waited in line,
Running into Denny who they'd met last time.
She remembered them well, the nuts in the lot,
Well, she didn't say THAT, what she said, I forgot!;-)
Soon herded in, Whosers sat at the back,
And Denny sat lonely, though friends she didn't lack.

Vanessa had been to this place long before,
And urged Lil' Ashley to watch the side door.
She did watch the door for many a minute,
Hoping that Ryan would soon appear in it.
But what to her wondering eyes should appear?
It was Brad, the studmuffin, in black leather gear.
Brad was unexpected and caused quite a buzz,
And Ash hid 'neath her coat cause embarrassed she was!

While she writhed there a'freakin', thinking she couldn't win,
The others nudged as a bald man sauntered in.
Now THIS was a great show for such a small fee,
Cause the bald man in question was C. Mochrie!
The bud of a squeal was there clenched in her throat,
And in spite of herself she dove back 'neath the coat!

"Perhaps they won't notice and we'll get away!"
She said as on-stage appeared Kathy Kinney.
But once they called Brad's name a reflex shout rose,
And Colin looked over as Ash-el-y froze.
He gave a small wave and to the stage strode,
And they screamed for him too as was Whoser Code.
Last Ryan appeared, Mr. Neon Love Chicken,
And so the show started and man, was it kickin'!

Too soon though, it ended and outside they bounded,
To make all their guys feel so loved and, well, hounded.

First they bugged Colin, but weary he grew,
So they let him go home, for like always they knew,
That Saturday morning a taping would bring,
With games to be watched and hoe-downs to sing.

Then Ashley bumped Brad, she says unintentional,
But all knew she was hot for his parts one and all.
He said "Just a minute!" the Whosers did gloat,
But Ash was embarrassed and grabbed for her coat.
He talked to them kindly and pictures they took,
As Ashley amused him with gobbledygook!

She had brought a picture she was gonna get signed,
But Brad grabbed it from her, and she stared 'behind.'
Ashley then said, the horn....er, freakiest Whoser,
"Would you please sign it too?" ....on the back, like a loser..
He noted this and "I'm a loser," did say,
But he signed on the back "P.S. Ryan is gay."

Now Whosers to Ryan did turn to attack,
But poor Lil' Ashley waited at the back.
Julie's calendar proved to be right on the money,
As Ryan perused it and said "This is funny!"

Vanessa saw Ash and to the forefront did drag,
She showed Ryan where Bradley had called him a .... differently life-styled individual.
Ryan called Brad to perhaps start a fray,
But Ryan said "Nothing Lover!" and Brad said "Ix-nay!"
"That's what he calls me," said he, tall as a pole,
And what does he call Brad? In his own words, "@sshole."

He offered the Whosers the pic of their dreams,
No, not the kind with naked contestants it seems!
Shame on your minds! This pic was a treat,
The entire cast all at once, what a feat!
They thanked him profusely and then turned to go,
For later they would see him too they did know.
As they exited slowly, a huffin' and puffin',
They all shouted "Bye bye to our favorite muffins!"

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